By Big Red Machine
From September 19, 2014
CHIKARA King of Trios 2014: Night 1 (9/19/2014)- Easton, PA
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: Bloc Party vs. Team UK (Mark Andrews, Damien Dunne, & “Dynamite” Pete Dunne)- 5.25/10
The fans gave this a ridiculously undeserved “this is awesome!” chant. I’m not saying that match was bad. It wasn’t. But it wasn’t anything CLOSE to awesome. Sean Waltman joined Mike Quackenbush on commentary, and they made reference to the fact that Bloc Party member Prakash Sabar seems to be a copy of X-Pac, but nothing came of it. Maybe they’ll do it later in the weekend.
GEKIDO PROMO- 17 and Jigsaw don’t seem to be getting along. The Shard wants to prove that he is a “killing machine.”
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: Gekido (17, Jigsaw, & The Shard) vs. Knight Eye for the Pirate Guy & Princesss Kimberlee- 6.75/10
Apparently this was a big grudge match because of some angle where Kimberlee bought the Campeonatos de Parejas and gave them to Knight Eye for the Pirate Guy. Does anyone have any memory of this? If this is something that happened in a Wrestling Is… promotion, they really should have built it up (or at least MENTIONED IT) on previous shows. Until Quack brought it up, I just assumed this as a first-round filler match and that Knight Eye for the Pirate Guy and Kimberlee were a randomly thrown-together babyface filler team.
Jolly Roger and Lance Steel I can take or leave, but my only previous experiences with Kimberlee were as a heel manager in CZW, and to be honest, I found her to be very flat and boring. So as a babyface wrestler in CHIKARA, I was quite pleasantly surprised with how much fire she showed.
The finish saw Jigsaw taking on Jolly Roger (his legit brother- I’m not sure if this is kayfabe true as well), but when Jigsaw wanted to tag out, his partners wouldn’t let him. Jigsaw went for a big superkick to the head, but stopped at the last moment. The Shard then yanked him out of the ring and 17 came in, applied one of his “seventeen forgotten holds,” made Roger tap out, and also injured his wrist. Jigsaw tried to help Roger after the match, but the other babyfaces ordered him to stay away while Roger shouted “you’re supposed to be my brother!” at him.
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: Kizarny & The Odditorium vs. The Spirit Squad (Kenny, Johnny, & Mikey)- 4/10
Yeah… neither Kiazrny nor the Odditorium are very good.
Leonard F. Chikarason referred to Mike Mondo’s time in ROH as “very successful.” I guess it’s a god think he isn’t running CHIKARA anymore. For those of you wondering how bad Mikey’s run in ROH was, at one point during this match, I found myself thinking “wow. He is a lot less annoying when he is playing an obnoxious male cheerleader than he is as himself.”
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: The Spectral Envoy vs. The Flood (Jimmy Jacobs, Eddie Kingston & Volgar)- 4.5/10
Kingston is now billed as “the Mad King” and has “Mad King” written on his chest. Jimmy Jacobs had the Lithuanian Snow Troll chained up, and tied him to the ringpost. Apparently he wasn’t kidnapped by The Flood so much as he tried to join them and sold out his two Baltic Siege compatriots.
At one point Deucalion showed up with Delirious and sent Delirious after UltraMantis Black, which led to the Flood winning (with Kingston hitting the Backfist to the Future but Jacobs getting the pin).
OLD FASHINONED & THUNDERKITTY PROMO- If their match doesn’t end with Deucalion committing a triple-homicide I will be very unhappy.
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: The Devastation Corporation (w/Sydney Bakabella) vs. Thunderkitty & Old Fashioned (Jervis Cottonbelly & Marion Fontaine)- 1/10
Dull match, and a bad botch on the finish.
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: 3 Peck 0 (Archibald Peck & 3.0) vs. Dr. Cube, Ares, & Nokken- 4.25/10
The story of the match was that Dr. Cube kept tagging himself in, which made Ares unhappy. Their inability to get along led to the heels’ undoing.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- bombshell after bombshell after bombshell!
Ares and Dr. Cube yell at each other. Cube slaps Ares. Ares goes to punch Cube, but Nokken stops him and turns on Ares!
Then Dr. Cube unmasks himself and…
HOLY FRICKIN’ POOP!
IT’S JAKOB HAMMERMEIER!
AND HE’S GOT THE EYE OF TYR!
Jakob admits that he had to make a deal with some devils to procure the Eye of Tyr. He also declares himself to be the new leader of the BDK, and will right all of the wrong that have befallen him in his career!
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: LAX (Chavo Guerrero Jr. Hernadez, & Homicide) vs. The Golden Trio (Icarus, Dasher Hatfield, & “Mr. Touchdown” Mark Angelosetti)- 6.5/10
Mr. Touchdown called LAX “nerds.” That was fantastic. The rest of the match was good, but nothing great.
GREEN HORN MILITIA PROMO- Kid Cyclone was the one who did all of the talking. His compatriots were Create-A-Wrestler II and Equinox III. They are unhappy that the vets aren’t fighting the Flood (in their opinion, anyway). They also want to avenge the deaths of the Latvian Proud Oak, the Estonian ThunderFrog, and Kobald… so they call out Deucalion. These guys are gonna diiiiiiiiiieeeeeee…
Or not. Deucalion didn’t show up… but Hallowicked did. He ordered the students to the back. Kid Cyclone was very good here. He’s definitely got a future.
KING OF TRIOS FIRST ROUND MATCH: The Colony vs. The Colony: Xtreme Force- 7/10
Great old-school babyfaces vs. heels stuff, good action, and a great story.
A weak opening night to what should still be a huge weekend for CHIKARA.