CHIKARA You Only Live Twice





By Big Red Machine
From May 25, 2014

CHIKARA You Only Live Twice
CHIKARA You Only Live Twice (5/25/2014)- Easton, PA

I apologize for the lack of Bond puns, but with all of the upcoming shows having Bond names, I figured that would get old really quickly. Also, I used them all up last year at ROH Live and Let Die.

THE SPECTRAL ENVOY vs. THE BRUDERSCHAFT DES KREUZES (Ares, Nokken, & Tursas) (w/Milo Schnitzler)- 6.25/10
HUGE chants for UltraMantis Black. Tursas returns to jump babyfaces before the bell. The crowd was ultra-hot for this match. We also got loud “dueling” chants of “HALLOWICKED!” Good trios action here (and an ugly-ass Stinger Splash from UMB), and a nice clean finish. Wrestling-wise this was really only about a 6, but the crowd bumped it up.

CHUCK TAYLOR vs. “SMOOTH SAILIN’” ASHLEY REMINGTON (w/two unnamed valets)- 5.5/10
Because this is CHIKARA, I should specify that Ashley Remington is a dude. He got chants of “LET’S GO SAILING!” I LOVE the Chikarmy. Both guys looked good and provided some levity. Remington is the world’s most babyface-ish babyface, and is a true gentleman. A great foil for “the Kentucky Gentleman” Chuck Taylor. For those who are wondering, I don’t think that the nautical jokes from the commentators during Remington’s matches will ever get old.

NEW CHIKARA OWNER ROBBIE ELLIS ADDRESSES THE CROWD-
Shane Hawke is with him, wearing glasses and a suit. He looks hilarious… but strangely resembles Wink Vavasseur. Robbie puts CHIKARA over as a “work of art” and introduces the new Director of Fun: Mike Quackenbush!
HUGE pop and standing ovation for Quack, as expected. He is still walking with a cane. He puts over the importance of “community” and puts over both the wrestlers and the fans, even calling out a few fans by name (the only name I recognized was Danielle Matheson of the Mandible Claw Podcast, so I assume that the rest of them are all also Podcasters or bloggers).

THE BATIRI vs. SINN BODHI & THE ODDITORIUM (Oliver Grimsley & Kefka the Quiet)-5/10
They do stuff to build up to the Batiri finally getting their hands on Sinn Bodhi, but Bodhi quickly gets himself DQed with a blatant low blow.

JUAN FRANCISCO DE CORONADO vs. JERVIS COTTONBELLY- 4.75/10
“PLEASE DON’T TALK!” chants for Coronado. When he did talk, the crowd booed so loudly that I couldn’t understand a word he was saying. The match was standard babyface vs. heel stuff, but I wasn’t into Jervis’ comedy moveset.

FOUR CORNERS TAG TEAM ELIMINATION MATCH: 3.0 vs. Pieces of Hate vs. The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & “Mr. Touchdown” Mark Angelosetti) vs. Gekido (17 & deviANT)-7.25/10
Jigsaw and The Shard don’t have the Campeonatos de Parejas belts with them. There is apparently a kayfabe reason for that, which is that when the Titor Conglomerate sold off all of CHIKARA’s assets, they sold of the Campeonatos de Parejas, too, and they were bought by someone who awarded them to Lance Steel and Jolly Roger (Knight Eye for the Pirate Guy).
The heels (who, last time I checked, were all still part of the same stable) worked together on the two teams of babyfaces. After 17 & deviANT were eliminated they did some angle with a few guys who were apparently students of Hallowicked’s attacked them on the outside, but Hallowicked ordered his students to go to the back. Apparently this was a result of something that happened at last night’s Wrestling is Fun! 2014 Tag World Grand Prix: Night 3.
The match was your standard CHIKARA mix of good action, good storytelling and fun. The announcers tried to convince us that Mr. Touchdown NOT coming in to break up a pin on Dasher was somehow a good thing. I’m not buying it. Anyway, the Throwbacks get the win, last eliminating Pieces of Hate, meaning that they now have three points (four actually) and a win over the currently recognized tag champions.

ARCHIBALD PECK vs. JIMMY JACOBS (w/two masked mystery men)- 5/10
HUGE pop for Archie! They do stuff. Jimmy wins via interference from his pals.

THE COLONY (Fire Ant, Green Ant, & Worker Ant) vs. THE COLONY: XTREME FORCE (Missile Assault Ant, Orbit Adventure Ant, & Arctic Rescue Ant) (w/combatANT)- 7.5/10
combatANT disappeared soon after the entrance. The new Worker Ant is the former assailANT. The Colony got a HUGE pop, as expected. They also have new outfits. The Colony: Xtreme Force taunted the original Colony with the medals that the Colony received for winning the 2011 King of Trios Tournament, which Wink Vavasseur stripped them of and awarded to the Colony: Xtreme Force last year. A ton of great Trios action, and a nice heel finish, but the babyfaces got some revenge after the match by taking back their King of Trios medals. And speaking of King of Trios, there will be one in 2014!

CHIKARA GRAND CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Eddie Kingston(c) vs. Icarus- 7.5/10
Icarus has new gear which looks terrible. Like an adult-sized child’s Halloween costume of a crappy superhero. Despite this, he is ridiculously over, which, he totally deserves after everything he has done to help bring CHIKARA back.
Kingston works over Icarus’ head and neck, and Icarus sells it well. All of the babyfaces came out to see Icarus win the Grand Championship, which he does via CHIKARA Special (although it really didn’t look very good). The match was still awesome, and felt like a big moment. A great way to close the show.


Wait... we're not one yet?

SHOW CLOSING SEGMENT AFTER THINGS WENT TO BLACK-
The entirety of The Flood (the evil anti-CHIKARA heels) came out, including guys who hadn't been on this show, like the Devastation Corporation and Dr. Cube. With them they had some gigantic dude dragging around a captive Delirious and Soldier Ant... but apparently it was a ruse and Delirious and Soldier Ant attacked the Technicos (with Solider Ant diving onto the Colony). A big brawl started, and the giant dude totally no-sold Kobald's spear, then murderized him with a ridiculously sick chokebreaker. The heels leave and the babyfaces all check on Kobald, who is carried off, unmoving.


A great first show back from CHIKARA. The stream and sound quality were fantastic, and the crowd was one of the best I have ever seen... and perhaps even more importantly, the story progressed.

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