Bob-O's Random Ramblings: RAW 3/14/11

[Bob-O]

I don't think I've sat down and watched an episode of Raw with anyone remotely smarky since the Monday Night Wars when I was in college. A few times with my father-in-law who thinks Vince McMahon owns TNA because Hulk Hogan works there. A few times with my wife who says "Hey! That's Mike from the Real World!" every time Miz is on screen and asks me "Is that hot?" every time there's a diva. Yes. Every time. I miss the days when five or six of my closest friends would pitch in on a 30 pack, fill the couches, and have us a Wrestlin' Night. The commentary was priceless. These days I keep my comments to myself because there's nobody in earshot that would understand. Tonight, and maybe many more to come, I loaded up a new topic, hit play on the DVR, and typed whatever came to mind. The results are below, and very reminiscent of one of those Monday Nights back in college. I present to you, The Revolution, Bob-O's Random Ramblings. Enjoy!

-Raw opens with another taped Rock segment. Just to make sure I'm up to speed, John Cena doesn't like The Rock because Rocky bailed on "The Universe". Rock retaliates by making fun of Cena. Cena returns the favor with "Rap". Rock makes fun of Cena more. Through all the garbage and mud slinging, the fact remains. Cena called Rock out about abandoning his WWE fans, and The Rock's got nothing for that. Make all the jokes you want, Rock's avoiding the point. Also, for somebody that claims his in-ring career is over, Rocky sure is promising a lot of ass-whoopin's. The less he delivers here, the more he confirms Cena's allegations. Just sayin...

-FINALLY, they're letting Miz do some self promotion. You know, maybe people would be more excited about this championship match if they let THE CHAMPION do what he does best. The Road To Wrestlemania should have been PAVED with Miz promos, especially when building to a match with somebody who can hang with him in that department. I dunno, maybe that's why I don't book things. I can't blame them for giving the Rock/Cena thing lots of airtime, it's compelling and entertaining. But, Miz's credibility (or lack there of) as WWE Champion is being exposed like a transvestite mistakenly walking into a men's room.

-Was Miz trying to make a statement by smashing up Khali with that chair? I'm not sure how comfortable I am with Miz needing a chair and outside interference to beat The Great Khali. I mean, what's he gonna do against Cena who can do things that Khali can't? You know, like run and jump? That's the statement I saw. Let Miz make his statements on the mic. Please. This is just wasting valuable time. We know Miz is athletically inferior to Cena. We will not believe that Miz is any kind of physical threat to him. That's not what this is about. It's about the possibility that Miz might weasel out a win and retain his championship on the big night.

-I REALLY do not give two turds about Triple H vs Undertaker. Who cares who wins!? I think we've gotten used to them BOTH not being around - and it's not so bad. I'm beating a dead horse here, but why not put the streak up against somebody that could stand to benefit from ending it? Answer: WWE does not have enough faith in any of their noobs to handle the kind of longevity that push would provide. That's my theory.

-Daniel Bryan's entrance really wasn't designed to sync up with a valet. I caught a chuckle as he came out with Gail and ditched her on the ramp in front of thousands. I'll bet when they eat out he's at the table before she's out of the car. I'll bet he's in the shower before she's got her clothes off. I'll bet... forget it, I could go on all night.
Mathews: "Daniel Bryan should be confident. He beat King Sheamus last week!"
Cole: "That was due to an injury."
Mathews: "It was still a victory, Cole."
Haha, what!? Mathews has been very disappointing tonight. So, Sheamus is the new US Champ. Uh oh Daniel Bryan. They had him working dark matches BEFORE this. It was fun while it lasted, but unless this writing on the wall was by dishonest vandals, I think Bryan might be headed to Superstars. It's sad that WWE Creative can't come up with anything to do with the best wrestler in the world. The man carried Sheamus for 10 minutes tonight! An awesome match, that if anything, tells me that if they continue to feature Daniel Bryan it will likely be to make other guys look good in the ring. I smell a Mason Ryan feud. Better than nothing I suppose. Some people are likely pissed because Sheamus is officially out of the World Title scene, but I disagree. I think the US Belt and Sheamus are a nice fit at this point in time. The reign should add some luster to a belt that's been off of TV for some time. I'm looking forward to it.

-Wow!? Did Jeff Jarrett get stung by bees!? Nope, this is what Brian Christopher looks like in 2011. It's what I'd imagine a love child between Dolph Ziggler and Dusty Rhodes to look like. Bizarre. I'll go on record saying that I've always been a fan of Brian Christopher, I think he's a very talented heel. Like the kind of talented that could have made Vince a lot of money had they not taken the "Comedy Low Road" with him. Christopher says Jerry Lawler never wanted a child. Megan's Law says otherwise. This segment was hard to watch, "I'm glad you didn't use the Lawler name" - "I didn't want to use the Lawler name" - "I'm glad." - "Good." - "Good!" - "But I didn't want to use it BEFORE you didn't want me to." - "Doesn't matter." - "Good! Wanna fight?" - "Nope." - "Good." The portion of this segment where Christopher kept calling Lawler "daddy" is usually the point in the evening where my wife walks in the room and wonders what the hell I'm watching. Jim Ross came out to remind us why we want him to return as an announcer and not as something we'd see a whole lot of on screen. I really hope Cole wins this match. He won't. But I hope he does. His character development is the only enjoyable thing to come out of this feud.

-It looks like Punk will have to wrestle his match with Randy Orton with NO ONE IN HIS CORNER. I think we all saw this coming 3 weeks ago. Orton's match with Mason tonight looked like a carbon copy of his match with Otunga. We've still got a few weeks before Wrestlemania, I wonder what Punk has up his sleeve...

-Drew Carey's going to the HOF, let the flame war begin! Apparently to make it to the Celebrity Wing of WWE's Hall you just have to be B-List and make one appearance with the company. With the criteria in mind, Carey isn't a bad choice. His Rumble appearance was awesome. The announcement also showed Raven. Raven was on Raw tonight.

-DAMMIT! I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR ZACK RYDER / SNOOKIE INTERACTION ALL EFFING NIGHT AND THEY GIVE ME, "uhhhh how 'bout this situation?" "Pretty solid." Whatever... such a shame. Ever get the feeling that they keep Zack Ryder around because they plan on putting him in a tag team? They just haven't found him a partner or a tag team division yet. His character is gold, he just needs someone to play off of.

-OK, if Vickie's shoes weren't supposed to come off in that match with Trish she's got a new fan. That was brilliant. LayCool helps Vickie win a spot on the RAW roster because they'll be damned if she's coming back to Smackdown. I'm not sure I agree with WWE presenting Snookie as a face tonight. If the rest of the WWE Universe is anything like me, and I know I am, they hate Jersey Shore as much as they hate The Lifetime Movie Network. I've got a gif someplace in my library of the scene where that dude punches Snookie in face. I can watch that thing loop for hours, it doesn't get old. I really hope Awesome Kong debuts at Wrestlemania by ripping Snookie's legs off, feeding them to her, and throwing her legless torso into the crowd. How would TMZ approach that one? I'm not sure I care.

-Skipped Shawn Micheals hyping the Trips/'Taker match. Meh. They could make this thing hair vs hair and I wouldn't give a rip.

-Del Rio vs Cena could have used some more hype, I think some people might have chosen Raw over other shows had they known they'd get Del Rio vs Cena in the main event. I'm dead set against Del Rio toting Brodus Clay around with him. Alberto has done just fine to date without any help, it's what makes his character so great. It's also beginning to smell a little like Miz and Riley. Not a lot like Miz and Riley, just a little. Just a thought here, but having Miz impersonate Rock is counterproductive. It's just a bad situation that WWE's created. People WANT to see Cena vs Rock, and they're not going to get it. Rock's made that clear. They should be making people want to see Cena vs MIZ, and Miz's promo to start the show was a good start that was completely ruined by dressing him up as the guy that all the fans would rather see. Let downs rarely work, unless you're CM Punk.

-Thanks for reading! I'll see you in the threads!
Bob-O

[Lynas]

THIS IS AWESOME! *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*

THANK YOU BOB-O *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*



I'm right with you man, me and 2 guys used to watch Raw & Smackdown every week, always us 3, we were always pumped, always had snacks & watched the shows & PPVs... We'd take it in turns if there was one to pay for (UK only ever has to pay for Royal Rumble, Wrestlemania, Survivor Series & Summerslam) & we'd just sit round, talk a wrestler up, talk a wrestler down... they were the best wrestling days of my life personally... Now they host UFC events all the time & I'm excluded because I find UFC boring. (Yes I said it... BORING).

You're not the only one who misses those days Bob-O

Who knows man, one day when I'm a millionaire and could afford the phone bill I'd call you and we can shoot the shit on Raw together as & when it happens!

[cero2k]

great read Bob-O,

i agree with the whole Miz/Cena/Rock thing, they need to stop the Cena/Rock hype if they wanna get people interested in the Miz/Cena match. I've been waiting for Miz to one up Rock for a while, forcing Cena and Rock to ignore eachother so Cena can focus on Miz...but oh well, i guess things will play out eventually.

On the Dragon thing, i think they didn't want Dragon coming in to WM as a champ, and thus they gave it to Sheamus, who will defend it against Daniel at WM....hopefully...

[Big Red Machine]

Great stuff. Absolutely hilarious at times (especially the Brian Christopher stuff). Good review

[Bob-O]

Now they host UFC events all the time & I'm excluded because I find UFC boring.

Same. I'm always invited, and I sometimes go, but it's not the same because I'm not passionate about it.

On the Dragon thing, i think they didn't want Dragon coming in to WM as a champ, and thus they gave it to Sheamus, who will defend it against Daniel at WM....hopefully...

Yeah, in retrospect, I may have jumped the gun. A feud with Sheamus isn't the worst thing that could happen to Danielson. I'm just skeptical due to the beatdown he took a few weeks back when Sheamus jumped him. If they pair them up as peers, it could do worlds of good for the both of them.

Great stuff. Absolutely hilarious at times (especially the Brian Christopher stuff). Good review

Thanks! Thanks for all the kind words, fellas. It's appreciated.

[cero2k]

On the Dragon thing, i think they didn't want Dragon coming in to WM as a champ, and thus they gave it to Sheamus, who will defend it against Daniel at WM....hopefully...

Yeah, in retrospect, I may have jumped the gun. A feud with Sheamus isn't the worst thing that could happen to Danielson. I'm just skeptical due to the beatdown he took a few weeks back when Sheamus jumped him. If they pair them up as peers, it could do worlds of good for the both of them.
.

yeah,for sure, at this point, Dragon needs to get into a feud with a main eventer (or at least former main eventer), and Sheamus needs someone that can make him look good and help develop more skill...