BRM Reivews the 11/25/2015 Impact

[Big Red Machine]

They have this f*cking annoying floating CGI turkey that that I wish I could reach into my TV and smack it in the head with a broom.

GROUP X-DIVISION TIE-BREAKER: DJ Zema Ion vs. Manik vs. Tigre Uno- 6.5/10
Probably was a bit better but my idiot sister insisted on standing right in front of the TV half of the time.

DREW GALLOWAY PROMO- fine

WORLD TITLE SERIES GROUP UK MATCH: Rockstar Spud(3) vs. Drew Galloway(6)- 6.75/10

WORLD TITLE SERIES GROUP UK MATCH: Bram(3) vs. Grado(0)- DUD!
Grado is a retard who is too dumb to stop dancing when the bell rings, so Bram just school boys him and gets the pin. What was the point of this? The only thing it accomplished was making Grado look like an idiot, which just makes using him on your TV a complete and total waste.
Josh completely buried Spud and Grado’s World Title Series match, saying that they “did every wrestling move that every kid has ever done,” which is exactly the problem with matches like that (or even just single spots like when ACH does a stunner and then does Austin’s mannerisms): it makes you look like someone who is playing wrestler instead of making you look like an actual wrestler.

The f*cking turkey is back.

WORLD TITLE SERIES GROUP FUTURE 4 MATCH: Jesse Godderz(3) vs. Micah(4)- 5.75/10

KURT ANGLE VIDEO PACKAGE- Kurt’s narrating voice was WAY too loud. It felt like he was trying too hard to make what he was saying sound natural, and as a result, he sounded phony.

GROUP TAG TEAM SPECIALISTS MATCH: Robbie E.(3) vs. Davey Richards(1)- 6.5/10

WORLD TITLE SERIES GROUP WILD CARD MATCH: Kenny King(3) vs. Crazzy Steve(0)- 4/10
Josh Matthews attempts to explain Crazzy Steve’s backstory with the Menagerie. Josh ran into two problems:
1. He continuously referred to it as a “circus” instead of a carnival
2. This required him to attempt to explain why Steve was still here when the rest of the Menagerie has long since disappeared.

AUSTIN ARIES PROMO- great.
Also, Rosita was there.

WORLD TITLE SERIES GROUP CHAMPIONS MATCH: Bobby Lashley(3) vs. Austin Aries(4) (w/Thea Trinidad)- 7.5/10
Great match! Aries smacks his head on the guardrail doing the Heat-Seeking Missile… and all Josh can talk about is how Aries might have caught his foot on the ropes.
This was a night of solid wrestling from TNA, but for some reason, most of these matches didn’t feel as urgent as they should have (I guess I have to blame the commentary for that). At this point, I am just so happy that this group play stage of the tournament is over.