BRM Reviews the 5/13/2015 Lucha Underground

[Big Red Machine]

OPENING BIT- intriguing. We learn the following:
1. Dario was not speaking metaphorically when he said that Matanza was his “brother.”
2. Dario spent a whole sh*t-to of money to purchase seven special medallions - one from each of the Aztec tribes- and when a person has all seven, he/she will be “as powerful as the gods themselves.”
3. Dario will be putting these medallions up in matches, and that starts tonight.

AERO STAR vs. JACK EVANS!- 6.25/10
Do you remember in Dragonball Z when Cell swallowed the other androids up, and each time he did, he would evolve into a new form? Well Jack Evans now has really shaggy hair and a beard, and looks exactly like what I would imagine Jack Evans’ new form would look like after swallowing Chris Sabin.
The match itself was spotty, but perfectly fine as an opener. The one thing that really disappointed me was Jack losing simply because I think he has a lot more star potential than Aero Star. I get that it’s a Lucha Libre show and they are trying to push Lucha in the American market (both to Hispanics and non-Hispanics), but there are other Luchadors en mascarada that I think have a lot more star potential and Aero Star (Fenix, Mil Muertes, Drago, Prince Puma), and Jack is one of the most unique workers in wrestling (a bit less unique than he was ten years ago, but having a slinky for a spine is a great asset for a babyface to get sympathy by being stretched. For evidence of this, just see the Cheerleader Melissa vs. MsChif matches, or Jack’s own matches against guys like Bryan Danielson- and the finish of their match at the inaugural ROH Survival of the Fittest comes to mind immediately).

BIG RYCK AND THE MACK BACKSTAGE- GREAT!
The only question is which one of these guys is going to turn on the other. Both are perfectly likely possibilities coming out of this segment.

WINNER GETS ONE OF THE AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Sexy Star vs. King Cuerno vs. Killshot vs. The Mack vs. Fenix vs. Pentagon Jr. vs. Cage- 7/10
They told a clear and simple story here: how the hell are you going to pin someone when there are so many guys who can run in and break it up. Also, HOLY SH*T THAT GORY BUSTER/PACKAGE PILEDRIVER SPOT WAS F*CKING AMAZING! Being the only feud in here, the Sexy Star vs. Pentagon Jr. feud was given a little extra time to shine, but in the end, it was Fenix picking up the first medallion.

DARIO AND THE TRIOS CHAMPS- very good. We’ve got a ladder match for the tag titles next week.

FENIX & CATRINA SEGMENT- weird.
Apparently Mil Muertes losing his casket match was all part of Catrina’s evil plan because that somehow transferred Fenix’s “power of a thousand lives” to Mil, so now Mil will be reborn stronger. Then she disappeared and three weirdos in skull masks appeared, perched on top of a locker, then jumped off onto Fenix. As I said: weird.

#1 CONTENDERSHIP MATCH THAT CAN BE WON ONLY BY PINFALL OR SUBMISSION: Hernandez vs. Alberto El Patron- really conflicted here. I’m halfway between calling it a dud and calling it a good segment. It was short and they did nothing until Mundo’s interference, so it feels like a segment, but I was REALLY looking forward to this match and didn’t get it. I know I’m supposed to be annoyed at Johnny Mundo, but I’m honestly a bit annoyed at the promotion, too. I guess if I’m being objective, I really should just rate this as a segment, in which case it was good. The stretcher part was very well done.

That being said… not only do I not like the Mundo heel turn, but I think the major misstep here, booking wise, was the “pinfall and submission only” stip. It came completely out of nowhere and only existed to justify Mundo’s interference being completely blatant. Furthermore, those rules FORCED them to have Alberto, one of their biggest stars and also the AAA Mega Champion, get pinned. Why would you do that if you don’t have to? You’re doing a f*ck finish anyway, so why not just do a ref bump and have the ref recover to see Alberto lying there, halfway through the window? Or just make it a No DQ’s match, which is essentially what this was, anyway? Doing that would allow you to have Del Rio lose by ref stoppage, which not only saves him the pin, but seeing Alberto lying there, halfway through a window, completely dead, really felt like the exact definition of someone who was “unable to continue the match.”

A good show from Lucha Underground, despite my dislike of the way the main event went down.

STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Striker tries to push that the “pinfalls and submissions only” stip gives Alberto an advantage by bringing up that seven of Alberto’s nine MMA victories have been by submission. The problems with this all stem from the following:
THIS IS PRO WRESTLING, NOT MMA! The situations are not analogous! MMA matches can end by submission, ref stoppage, or decision. This match not only can’t be won by decision or ref stoppage, but THIS MATCH HAS PINFALLS! MMA DOESN’T! That’s a BIG F*CKING DIFFERENCE! Why bring up MMA when it would be much more relevant to put over how many PROFESSIONAL WRESTING MATCHES Alberto has won by submission?!
And to make things even stupider, I’d ask why bringing up how many matches Alberto has won by pinfall is supposed to give Alberto an advantage? Alberto has won a bunch of matches by submission? SO WHAT?! This match can be won by either submission or by pinfall… and we know that Hernandez wins most of his matches by pinfall… so why do these rules favor Alberto?

2. Striker tells us that Alberto has an experience advantage over Hernandez. This comes just a few minutes after telling us that Hernandez has been wrestling for twenty years (which is close to true but not quite). Alberto has only been wrestling for fifteen. If you’re going to go out of your way to do the research for one guy, why not do the research for both of them.

[cero2k]

FENIX & CATRINA SEGMENT- weird.
Apparently Mil Muertes losing his casket match was all part of Catrina’s evil plan because that somehow transferred Fenix’s “power of a thousand lives” to Mil, so now Mil will be reborn stronger. Then she disappeared and three weirdos in skull masks appeared, perched on top of a locker, then jumped off onto Fenix. As I said: weird.

it took me a while to realize that the "man of a thousand lives" was fighting the "man of a thousand deaths"

#1 CONTENDERSHIP MATCH THAT CAN BE WON ONLY BY PINFALL OR SUBMISSION: Hernandez vs. Alberto El Patron- really conflicted here. I’m halfway between calling it a dud and calling it a good segment. It was short and they did nothing until Mundo’s interference, so it feels like a segment, but I was REALLY looking forward to this match and didn’t get it. I know I’m supposed to be annoyed at Johnny Mundo, but I’m honestly a bit annoyed at the promotion, too. I guess if I’m being objective, I really should just rate this as a segment, in which case it was good. The stretcher part was very well done.

That being said… not only do I not like the Mundo heel turn, but I think the major misstep here, booking wise, was the “pinfall and submission only” stip. It came completely out of nowhere and only existed to justify Mundo’s interference being completely blatant. Furthermore, those rules FORCED them to have Alberto, one of their biggest stars and also the AAA Mega Champion, get pinned. Why would you do that if you don’t have to? You’re doing a f*ck finish anyway, so why not just do a ref bump and have the ref recover to see Alberto lying there, halfway through the window? Or just make it a No DQ’s match, which is essentially what this was, anyway? Doing that would allow you to have Del Rio lose by ref stoppage, which not only saves him the pin, but seeing Alberto lying there, halfway through a window, completely dead, really felt like the exact definition of someone who was “unable to continue the match.”

LU has been doing the whole 'we want a winner' thing before, so i wasn't surprised nor i thought it would telegraph the finish. Alberto did get pinned, but it doesn't hurt him at all, he literally had to crash through Dario's office to get taken out, he was bloodied and completely unconscious at the end, i feel he's still looks strong as fuck, and considering Hernandez is a heel now, that pin could work later on if he fails to win the title from Puma, he can then challenge Alberto for his title. I think this works. Mundo's turn I also feel is good, a good change in character, and at least they didn't turn Alberto like they had hinted in the weeks leading up to this

[Big Red Machine]

#1 CONTENDERSHIP MATCH THAT CAN BE WON ONLY BY PINFALL OR SUBMISSION: Hernandez vs. Alberto El Patron- really conflicted here. I’m halfway between calling it a dud and calling it a good segment. It was short and they did nothing until Mundo’s interference, so it feels like a segment, but I was REALLY looking forward to this match and didn’t get it. I know I’m supposed to be annoyed at Johnny Mundo, but I’m honestly a bit annoyed at the promotion, too. I guess if I’m being objective, I really should just rate this as a segment, in which case it was good. The stretcher part was very well done.

That being said… not only do I not like the Mundo heel turn, but I think the major misstep here, booking wise, was the “pinfall and submission only” stip. It came completely out of nowhere and only existed to justify Mundo’s interference being completely blatant. Furthermore, those rules FORCED them to have Alberto, one of their biggest stars and also the AAA Mega Champion, get pinned. Why would you do that if you don’t have to? You’re doing a f*ck finish anyway, so why not just do a ref bump and have the ref recover to see Alberto lying there, halfway through the window? Or just make it a No DQ’s match, which is essentially what this was, anyway? Doing that would allow you to have Del Rio lose by ref stoppage, which not only saves him the pin, but seeing Alberto lying there, halfway through a window, completely dead, really felt like the exact definition of someone who was “unable to continue the match.”

LU has been doing the whole 'we want a winner' thing before, so i wasn't surprised nor i thought it would telegraph the finish. Alberto did get pinned, but it doesn't hurt him at all, he literally had to crash through Dario's office to get taken out, he was bloodied and completely unconscious at the end, i feel he's still looks strong as fuck, and considering Hernandez is a heel now, that pin could work later on if he fails to win the title from Puma, he can then challenge Alberto for his title. I think this works. Mundo's turn I also feel is good, a good change in character, and at least they didn't turn Alberto like they had hinted in the weeks leading up to this
You'd still have a winner... just not by pinfall. It just seemed like the exact sort of spot you'd use a referee stoppage (and it's always nice to establish that as legit finish because American fans aren't used to it), but they couldn't use it for no adequately explained reason.
I had also thought of the Alberto vs. Hernandez title build, but figured they could use this to set up a match in AAA rather than in LU. I don't see either Hernandez vs. Puma or this new Mundo vs. Alberto feud ending soon.