BRM Reviews the 12/3/2014 Lucha Underground

[Big Red Machine]

DARIO CUETO & BIG RYCK BACKSTAGE- Cueto signs Ryck to an exclusive contract. Ryck likes money. Cueto promises that things will get more “entertaining” by which he made it clear that he means “violent.”

IVELISSE & SON OF HAVOC PROMO- Ivelisse complains about the fact that Son of Havoc has been given opponents who are insulting to him. Unfortunately this required Ivelisse, who has looked great in both of her appearances, to say that it was insulting to Son of Havoc to wrestle a woman. She says that if they wanted to put up with this disrespect, they wouldn’t have signed a “seven-year contract” to fight in Lucha Underground. Yeah… I’m not a big fan of the concept of Lucha Underground (the kayfabe underground fight club run by Dario Cueto, not the legit promotion) signing people to big contracts. It just goes against the feel they have done such a good job of setting up (I was okay with it with Ryck because the way I interpreted the previous segment was that the unwritten terms of the contract were that Ryck would also protect Cueto from those he has angered).
She says they would be “living in Nashville,” though I’m not sure why. I assume this was supposed to be a TNA reference, but TNA did most of their taping in Orlando, so living in Nashville wouldn’t have helped them much. Her delivery was good, but all the talk of contracts and working for other promotions instead felt very out of place in Lucha Underground.
Son of Havoc then made an open challenge to anyone “man enough” to face him. I was expecting Sexy Star to answer the challenge, but what we got was much better…

SON OF HAVOC (w/Ivelisse) vs. PIMPINELLA ESCARLATA- 4/10
Yes, we have our first exotico. Major props to them for finding a new way to keep this angle going without making it feel repetitive. You’ve also got to give the bookers a lot of credit for the sheer amount of cajones they have shown so far. They have not shied away from things that will probably make some people uncomfortable (male vs. female matches, exoticos) or that some people might see and immediately dismiss as a joke (minis) in their first season. They wanted to bring us Lucha Libre and that’s what they are doing. These things deserve to be here because they are a part of Lucha Libre.
Major props are also due to Vampiro for pointing out that flamboyant characters have always been a part of wrestling, so this really shouldn’t be looked at as anything strange. Unfortunately, instead of using perfectly ambiguous term “character,” he used the more kayfabe-breaking word “persona,” and then following it up by outright using the word “gimmick.”
The match itself started with Son of Havoc jumping Pimpinella from behind, but Pimpinella quickly made a comeback and did one of those rope-walk things where you grab the opponent’s arm... and while he did this, Ivelisse just jumped in the ring to yell at him… and the referee did NOTHING to remove her. (Fortunately Pimpinella did, hitting her with a crossbody which got a huge pop).
The match was good for the time it got and the crowd was very into Pimpinella. Mascarita Sagrada came out to chase Ivelisse away after she interfered too many times. This wound up distracting Son of Havoc, which allowed Pimpinella to do the lip lock and then roll him up for the win. I get that the lip lock is part of the gimmick, but that’s sexual assault right there and thus people really shouldn’t be cheering for it.

JOHNNY MUNDO & DARIO CUETO BACKSTAGE- Mundo is about to beat Cueto up. Cueto promises he can get Johnny the $100,000 he owes him from the first episode. Johnny gives him the chance to get it, but steals the big key Cueto wears around his neck (which I assume is the key to the temple) as insurance.

FAMOUS B vs. MIL MUERTES (w/Catrina)- squash
When Muertes came out, Matt Striker and Vampiro had an exchange that can be paraphrased as follows:
Striker: Wow. Catrina’s really hot. Doesn’t she distract you?
Vampiro: No. I’m focused on doing my job, which is to focus on the wrestlers and get over the important angles rather than blather on about how hot some chick is.
This made me extremely happy.
Unfortunately, their very next exchange ruined it as Striker speculated that Mil Muertes dropping to one knee and posing on the seal in the middle of the ring had some sort of religious/superstitious significance to him, but Vampiro said that in his opinion, what was happening was Muertes “getting on his knees before” Catrina, and thus meant that she must be manipulating him. Not only does Vampiro’s idea not match up with what we have seen so far, it isn’t even an accurate representation of what is happening in the ring right now because she is standing behind him, SHOWING DEFERENCE TO HIM, as he goes down to only one knee, right in the middle of the symbol. Even worse, Vampiro’s actual wording could easily be called misogynistic.

DRAGO VIDEO PACKAGE- TOTALLY AWESOME!

KING CUERNO vs. DRAGO- 4/10
Short, but very fast-paced. Cuerno kicked out of the roll-up that Drago pinned him with last time, then hit his finisher for the win. The mystery woman showed up again, but also quickly left again. Once again, I’m not sure that anyone other than Striker, Vampiro, and the cameraman even noticed her. Cuerno kicked Drago after the match and declared that “the hunt has just begun.”

For the first time, they announced tonight’s main event, which will be Pentagon Jr. & Chavo vs. Sexy Star & Fenix. They really should be announcing these at the start of the show.

JOHNNY MUNDO DEMANDS THAT CUETO GIVE HIM THE $100,000-
Big Ryck shows up instead and demands that Johnny scram. Johnny takes him out with a dive. Konnan then shows up (to a huge pop) and tells Mundo that the money in question rightfully belongs to Prince Puma. This would be a lot easier to justify if Mundo hadn’t beaten Puma clean. Konnan blamed Puma’ problems with Ryck and his henchman on Johnny, and announced that Prince Puma would no longer have Johnny’s back.
Speaking of Johnny’s back, the fact that he was talking to Konnan meant that his back was turned to Big Ryck, who attacked him from behind (and Konnan easily could have warned him, but chose not to). Prince Puma showed up to make the save, but once he and Johnny had disposed of Ryck with a double dropkick, Puma punched Mundo in the face (nothing cheap-shotty about it at all) and they started brawling before refs and security showed up to pull them apart.
Then Dario Cueto showed up with a briefcase full of money. He announced that Big Ryck did not read the fine print on the contract he had signed earlier, which said that he would have to earn a $100,000 signing bonus, so books a $100,000 ladder match for next week. According to Striker, the match is a three way. Striker called this news “bombshell-social-media-dirtsheet-quality.” Yeah… calling something “social-media-quality” is not a complement.

The announcers noted that Blue Demon Jr. has begun training for his return and will be coming after Chavo soon. Cool.

Melissa Santos looks a lot less generic this week, but she also dropped the Spanish pronunciation of Texas, which was one of those little touches that I had really been enjoying about Lucha Underground.

CHAVO GUERRERO JR. & PENTAGON JR. vs. SEXY STAR & FENIX- 5.75/10
Matt Striker claimed that Sexy Star was the first person who came out to defend Blue Demon Jr. from Chavo after Chavo’s turn. She was actually one of the last. Matt Striker also fails to understand the important distinction between “redemption” and “revenge.” She did not fail at anything, therefore these is no redemption to be had. Sexy Star is looking for revenge. Chavo attacked her, so now she wants to kick his ass in return.

On that note, I wasn’t a fan of the way this match started. They shined Fenix up and then he tagged Sext Star in while Chavo was down and she got her offense in. If you are going to portray as a woman who is tough enough to wrestle with the men, then you need to let her actually be equal to them! SHE should have been the one who got shined, not Fenix. What they did when she got the hot tag was much more like what they should have done here. The match was pretty solid otherwise, although Fenix getting his hot tag, doing two moves, then immediately getting cut off just made me laugh at him because he looked like such a chump.

Matt Striker points out to us that the fans are letting Chavo know what they think of him by chanting “gulero!” at the top of their lungs. Unfortunately, Matt did not explain to us English-speakers- on this the English version of the show- what “gulero” means.

This was my least favorite episode of Lucha Underground yet, and I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that the unique feel of the show was often absent. There weren’t many of their great backstage segments, we got a pull-apart, a lot of talk about “contracts,” and people saying they would rather be somewhere else, and that sort of stuff. And Striker’s announcing didn’t help.

STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1 & 2. Matt Striker said that Fenix was “doing the valiant thing here by taking the beating for Sexy Star. “
No, Matt. Just… no. He clearly isn’t taking this beating to protect her because he is trying to tag her in, so that she can fight while he recovers, just like he did for her a few minutes ago. What is really going on he is something FOLLOWING THE RULES! Fenix is taking the beating right now while Sexy Star is not because HE IS THE LEGAL COMPETITOR RIGHT NOW AND SHE IS NOT! She is being virtuous by obeying the agreed-upon rules of the fight!
I get that Striker likes to tell stories, but he needs to stop imposing his own stories on the action and instead tell the stories that the wrestlers and bookers are trying to tell. After Sexy Star got the hot tag, Striker told us that she wanted revenge on Chavo. When she started getting her offense in Striker said that she was fighting for every little girl who was ever told that they couldn’t play with the boys. The problem is… THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHY SHE IS PISSED AT CHAVO!

3. Matt Striker- “The Five Star Frog Splash: an homage to Eddie Guerrero.”
Yes. And what better way to pay homage to a wrestler then by doing his signature move but calling the name of the other guy most famous for using at that same time.

[cero2k]

Melissa Santos looks a lot less generic this week, but she also dropped the Spanish pronunciation of Texas, which was one of those little touches that I had really been enjoying about Lucha Underground.
we're in the second set of tapings, i guess we still have two more weeks until she changes the look again. hopefully


Matt Striker points out to us that the fans are letting Chavo know what they think of him by chanting “gulero!” at the top of their lungs. Unfortunately, Matt did not explain to us English-speakers- on this the English version of the show- what “gulero” means.
Culero, either used as 'asshole' or as 'this sucks' depending if you're referencing a person or an event