BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
- Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
OPENING SEGMENT-The crowd was right. This WAS boring.
Dixie’s stable came out and cut promos. Magnus was decent, but everything else was dull and boring. MVP and Joe came out and announced that Joe would get his title shot at Lockdown. If Joe is the “#1 Contender” then this would violate the 30 Days Rule. Then Gunner came out and announced that he would cash in his briefcase next week. Dixie then announces that Gunner will put the Feast or Fired Briefcase on the line tonight against EC III. MVP made EC III put his briefcase on the line in this match, too… then he made it a ladder match. So we are getting a VERY high stakes ladder match on free TV with no build at all. And I mean NO build, because Tenay told us that that match would be next. How Mike knew this, I have no idea.
MVP also called EC III “C-3PO.” That made me laugh.
LADDER MATCH FOR THE TAG TEAM TITLE AND WORLD TITLE FEAST OR FIRED BRIEFCASES: Gunner vs. Ethan Cater III- DUD! (it ended BY DQ!)
Mike Tenay needs to go. He is just so f*cking annoying. Gunner hit what was clearly a simple powerbomb, but Mike had to call it a “powerbomb-type move.” He also thought that this match was a great time to plug a “Twitter War” between MVP and Dixie.
So when he made this match, MVP had said that Dixie’s people had better not interfere, or else. Magnus, of course, did interfere. James Storm came out to make the save and cleared the heels out of the ring. Gunner and Storm just stand around, and I start screaming “CLIMB THE F*CKING LADDER, YOU MORON!” at my TV. Well apparently the reason he wasn’t doing so was that, as MVP told us, this match had been “thrown out.” In other words, THEY HAD A DISQUALIFICATION IN THE MIDDLE OF A F*CKING LADDER MATCH! Putting the stupidity of that concept aside for the moment, I will also say that if that is the case RING THE F*CKING BELL AND HAVE CHRISTY ANNOUNCE IT TO US SO THAT WE KNOW WHAT HAS HAPPENED! It’s not that hard!
MVP then restarts the match as a tag team match, pitting Magnus and EC III against Storm and Gunner with the same stips. Or at least I think he did. When he was announcing it, he never actually said it was a tag team match. When we got back from commercial, Tenay clarified for us that indeed it was now a tag team match, so we have…
LADDER MATCH FOR THE TAG TEAM TITLE AND WORLD TITLE FEAST OR FIRED BRIEFCASES: James Storm & Gunner vs. Ethan Carter III & Magnus- 0.5/10
So the heels beat the sh*t out of the babyfaces. They are then about to win, but get into a stupid argument about who should climb the ladder to get the win. This stupid argument allows the babyfaces to get the win. The problem is that heels look like idiots for arguing over something that doesn’t matter at all, and the babyfaces look even worse because they got their asses kicked so badly that they only won because the heels couldn’t get along with each other.
ANDERSON PROMO- he says that tonight ‘s casket match is about family because he has one and Bully doesn’t, then shows me a picture of his newborn twins. This angle has been so terrible that I don’t care.
ZEMA BRO-MANS, & SPUD BACKSTAGE- good. Then MVP showed up. Apparently this arena only has one fancy VIP suite, so he and Dixie have to share. Spud mentions something about “the interests of fairness” (because they can’t resist ripping off the WWE), so MVP says it would be fair to strip Bro-Mans of the tag titles. HOW IN THE HELL WOULD THAT BE FAIR?!
Then MVP books Bro-Mans & Zema against the Wolves and a mystery partner… and apparently that match is next. A few problems here:
1) Why would you not build the Wolves’ in-ring debuts up at all? Tenay tried to tell us it was a “special moment,” but because of how sudden and random it was and the total lack of hype, it didn’t feel like anything other than a regular tag team match.
2) What is the purpose of assigning a mystery partner if we are going to find out who it is three minutes, anyway?
3) Why would you give the Wolves a partner of any sort? All that does is divert the attention from where it should be: The Wolves.
They also revealed that there was a deal in place between EC III and Bro-Mans that EC III would not cash in his tag team title shot for a very long time. Upon learning of this, Mike Tenay just dismisses this act of unethical collusion by saying the equivalent of “well… that deal isn’t in place anymore.” When something similar happened in ROH, they played it off as if it was a HUGE scandal. In TNA, the babyface announcer doesn’t even bat an eyelash at unethical behavior.
ZEMA ION & THE BRO-MANS vs. THE WOLVES & SAMOA JOE- 5.25/10... but a total creative failure.
In this, the Wolves in-ring debut, they decide not to highlight the Wolves tag team work, but rather… JOE is the one who gets the hot tag and the win. THESE PEOPLE ARE F*CKING IDIOTS!
VELVET PLEADS WITH DIXIE- F*CKING IDIOTIC!
1) Despite knowing about this match for a week, Velvet Sky decided to wait until HALF WAY THROUGH THE SHOW THE MATCH IS SUPPOSED TO TAKE PLACE ON to try to get out of it.
2) Despite the myriad times we have been told that man-on-women violence is not allowed on Spike TV (it was actually AN IMPORTANT PART OF AN ANGLE AT ONE POINT!), Dixie does nothing to prevent this match. I guess she doesn’t care if they get in trouble with their TV network. Also, how the hell did this even get officially booked in the first place?
3) Velvet’s logic completely fails. She asks Dixie to cancel the match because Dixie “has always been a strong proponent of the Knockouts.” If she is a strong proponent of the Knockouts, would she WANT to see them take that next step and break down the gender barrier and start competing against male wrestlers?
4) MVP is all outraged because this match will be “a man vs. a woman.” Tell me, MVP. What is wrong with that? Are you suggesting that women are somehow inherently weaker or less physically capable or perhaps not smart enough to compete against men? Because that’s what it sounds like here. And yet, I can’t help but think that if the match were Awesome Kong against Amazing Red, no one would bad an eyelash.
If the problem is one of a size mismatch, just say so (though that is its own can of worms). If the problem is one of gender, then you need to address it in a way that isn’t sexist. The “Spike TV won’t allow it” thing actually does a fantastic job of this, but TNA decides not to use that because they are stupid.
Anyhow, you would think that, with his big objection here, MVP would actually DO SOMETHING about this match which he sees as unfair along gender lines, which is a major issue in society and booking it would certainly get TNA a lot of bad press… But no. Instead, this results in MVP saying that he isn’t a wrestler anymore… then point out that Spud is a wrestler… then booking himself against Spud… and that he will call the director’s truck to make sure that match will be next. So they are also giving away MVP’s in-ring debut in a bullsh*t match with almost no build.
WHAT THE F*CK?!
So you know how MVP, the new investor with equal power to Dixie, just said he would call the director’s truck and make sure that his match with Spud was next? Well apparently MVP has the power to hire and fire people and make matches, does not have the power to control the order of the card because the next thing on the show was…
ABYSS SPEAKS- He says that he never wanted this to happen, and calls EY out to speak with him. EY comes out and the first words he says are “I was just trying to help.”
Oh. You were just trying to “help?” Well let’s look at the end result of your help: “You took a nice, happy go-lucky lawyer and, against his desires, turned him into a psychopathic killing machine which you have now unleashed on the world. I think I speak for everyone when I say “thanks for the ‘help,’ asshole!
Joseph/Abyss was actually really awesome here. He says he doesn’t want to be Abyss anymore. EY offers to help, but Joseph says he doesn’t want EY’s help. He says that he needs to go away and fix EY’s mistake. He says he needs to find someone who truly understands him. So the big pay-off to Abyss returning is… Abyss going away again. Way to go, TNA!
CHRISTY HEMME & SAM SHAW BACKSTAGE- very good
ROCKSTAR SPUD vs. MVP- an entirely pointless squash that gains you nothing.
Taz describes MVP’s finisher as a “gang-style kick.” This would be the same MVP who has spent most of his adult life trying to DISTANCE HIMSELF from the gang lifestyle that he led in his childhood.
ROODE LOOKS FOR DIXIE BACKSTAGE- this happened last week. Snore.
WILLOW THE WISP VIDEO PACKAGE- WHY?! Just… WHY?! Jeff Hardy is one of the (if not THE) most over wrestlers on TNA’s roster. They could have him be his established, over self… or they could have him be a lunatic in a weird mask with a stupid name. TNA chooses the latter. That is really all you need to know to understand why this company is in such a sh*tty place right now.
DIXIE & ROODE BACKSTAGE- okay.
Dixie is calling someone for help. I assume that this will lead to something big. Roode interrupts her, saying she owes him a title shot and calls her a sore loser. Dixie refuses to give him a title shot. Roode warns Dixie that she doesn’t want him as her enemy.
CHRIS SABIN vs. VELVET SKY-
Sabin made fun of Velvet’s entrance by pretty much dry-humping the ropes. That was funny. Remember how MVP was clearly not okay with this match going down. Well to stop it, he… DID NOTHING! Your babyface, ladies and gentlemen: See an unfair match and a damsel in distress… and not lifting a f*cking finger.
Sabin yells at Velvet a lot and offers her the first shot. She kicks him in the knee. For some reason, the ref didn’t even ring the bell. Sabin yells at her some more, so she kicks him in the nuts… but he has a cup on, which he takes off and proudly holds up, bragging to everyone about how he outsmarted Velvet… so while he is holding the cup up and showing it off, she runs over and gives him a low blow.
I really don’t know how to rate this segment. It was fantastic (for the most part, the kick to the knee was dumb. They should have gone straight for the nut shot), with the heel definitely getting just comeuppance… but from a point of view of the company as a whole, it should never have happened and the company (and our new babyface authority figure) look like idiots and hypocrites for letting it happen in the first place.
Wait… sh*t. I spoke too soon.
Velvet starts pounding on Sabin, which was really unnecessary. It just takes away from the nut shot. Less is more. Then Alpha Female shows up (Taz and Tenay have no idea who she is, so I guess she just jumped the guardrail and no one tried to stop her) and beat Velvet up. She put he in the Masterlock, then Sabin pinned Velvet and Alpha Female counted the three (the idiot ref went down to count it, too… in a match that never even officially started. The individual components were all good, but they blew threw about six week’s worth of angles in five minutes. WHY?!
BULLY RAY GOES THROUGH ANDERSON’S STUFF BACKSTAGE- Apparently Anderson doesn’t know that the point of a “locker room” is that it is a room filled with lockers in which you can put your stuff so that no one f*cks with it. Bully pulled out Anderson’s passport (really, Ken! Anyone could walk into that room and steal your identity! That is horribly irresponsible. Haven’t you seen a single identity theft commercial on TV?!), but then put it back and took out Anderson’s phone. Apparently Ken is too dumb to set up a password for his phone, either, because Bully picks it right up and makes a long-distance call to Anderson’s house, promising Anderson’s wife that he will send Ken home to her “in a coffin” and telling her to say goodbye to his children for him. This whole thing with Anderson’s family is just not doing anything for me at all.
THE CAMERAMAN INTERVIEWS BOBBY ROODE- Roode says he flipped out in Dixie’s office, that he “can’t handle it anymore” and that “it has to come to an end.” He also says “it’s over” and that he needs to take some time to think things over. Apparently he is being kicked out of the arena on Dixie’s orders, and he seems accepting of this punishment. This was very well done, but I REALLY don’t want to see Roode turn babyface. He is BY FAR the strongest heel they have right now.
Taz and Tenay mention that Dixie apparently has an offer for MVP that she will present before the end of the shows… so once again, the big hyped up match isn’t really the main event.
CASKET MATCH: Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson- 6/10
Bully wore a Lieverpool Jersey in order to get cheap heat. This would be good under normal circumstances, but it just felt sooooo out of place with Bully’s current character. The match was decent. It got ten minutes, plus a commercial. They went at a very slow pace. Great finish, but not too much else. With just how “personal” TNA seems to want this feud to be, this really didn’t seem like a big enough blowoff.
During this match, Taz and Tenay spoil the fact that Dixie’s offer to MVP will be a buyout offer. Does anyone really think there is a chance in hell of MVP accepting this?
DIXIE OFFERS TO BUY MVP OUT- he refuses. Who could have seen that coming?
MVP counters by offering to but his shares of the company up against Dixie’s at Lethal Lockdown… so they are going to blow this off after LESS THAN A MONTH AND A HALF?!
Dixie refused the offer at first, but then it seemed like she accepted it, so I really have no idea whether the match was made or not. This was a horribly over-scripted segment with a horribly confusing result.
A terrible show from TNA. They have NO F*CKING IDEA how to hype matches. They didn’t even try. They just kept making a match and then announcing that that match would be next. They only went into the show with TWO matches announced, and one of those was an intergender match which Spike’s rules do not allow, so how it got booked was a mystery. They f*cked the Wolves debut up horrendously, wasted MVP’s debut, and failed at pretty much everything they tried. They feel the need to make absolutely everything on the show about MVP vs. Dixie, and as a result, it is suffocating everything else.
STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Tenay mentions that Taz has called the Wolves “legit.”
As opposed to what? Some sort of fake wrestlers? Why the f*ck would you ever say something like this? It doesn’t help the Wolves and it just sh*ts on everyone else!
2. Taz notes that the beginning of MVP’s music “kind of had a Godzilla feel to it.”
In four and a half years in TNA, he has never once said that about Joe’s music, which ACTUALLY HAS THE GODZILLA THEME in the beginning of it.
3. “Professor” Tenay believes that Spud saying that he has “a bit of artful dodger” in him is a reference to a gang of some sort, rather than some osrt of reference to British wrestling.
Dixie’s stable came out and cut promos. Magnus was decent, but everything else was dull and boring. MVP and Joe came out and announced that Joe would get his title shot at Lockdown. If Joe is the “#1 Contender” then this would violate the 30 Days Rule. Then Gunner came out and announced that he would cash in his briefcase next week. Dixie then announces that Gunner will put the Feast or Fired Briefcase on the line tonight against EC III. MVP made EC III put his briefcase on the line in this match, too… then he made it a ladder match. So we are getting a VERY high stakes ladder match on free TV with no build at all. And I mean NO build, because Tenay told us that that match would be next. How Mike knew this, I have no idea.
MVP also called EC III “C-3PO.” That made me laugh.
LADDER MATCH FOR THE TAG TEAM TITLE AND WORLD TITLE FEAST OR FIRED BRIEFCASES: Gunner vs. Ethan Cater III- DUD! (it ended BY DQ!)
Mike Tenay needs to go. He is just so f*cking annoying. Gunner hit what was clearly a simple powerbomb, but Mike had to call it a “powerbomb-type move.” He also thought that this match was a great time to plug a “Twitter War” between MVP and Dixie.
So when he made this match, MVP had said that Dixie’s people had better not interfere, or else. Magnus, of course, did interfere. James Storm came out to make the save and cleared the heels out of the ring. Gunner and Storm just stand around, and I start screaming “CLIMB THE F*CKING LADDER, YOU MORON!” at my TV. Well apparently the reason he wasn’t doing so was that, as MVP told us, this match had been “thrown out.” In other words, THEY HAD A DISQUALIFICATION IN THE MIDDLE OF A F*CKING LADDER MATCH! Putting the stupidity of that concept aside for the moment, I will also say that if that is the case RING THE F*CKING BELL AND HAVE CHRISTY ANNOUNCE IT TO US SO THAT WE KNOW WHAT HAS HAPPENED! It’s not that hard!
MVP then restarts the match as a tag team match, pitting Magnus and EC III against Storm and Gunner with the same stips. Or at least I think he did. When he was announcing it, he never actually said it was a tag team match. When we got back from commercial, Tenay clarified for us that indeed it was now a tag team match, so we have…
LADDER MATCH FOR THE TAG TEAM TITLE AND WORLD TITLE FEAST OR FIRED BRIEFCASES: James Storm & Gunner vs. Ethan Carter III & Magnus- 0.5/10
So the heels beat the sh*t out of the babyfaces. They are then about to win, but get into a stupid argument about who should climb the ladder to get the win. This stupid argument allows the babyfaces to get the win. The problem is that heels look like idiots for arguing over something that doesn’t matter at all, and the babyfaces look even worse because they got their asses kicked so badly that they only won because the heels couldn’t get along with each other.
ANDERSON PROMO- he says that tonight ‘s casket match is about family because he has one and Bully doesn’t, then shows me a picture of his newborn twins. This angle has been so terrible that I don’t care.
ZEMA BRO-MANS, & SPUD BACKSTAGE- good. Then MVP showed up. Apparently this arena only has one fancy VIP suite, so he and Dixie have to share. Spud mentions something about “the interests of fairness” (because they can’t resist ripping off the WWE), so MVP says it would be fair to strip Bro-Mans of the tag titles. HOW IN THE HELL WOULD THAT BE FAIR?!
Then MVP books Bro-Mans & Zema against the Wolves and a mystery partner… and apparently that match is next. A few problems here:
1) Why would you not build the Wolves’ in-ring debuts up at all? Tenay tried to tell us it was a “special moment,” but because of how sudden and random it was and the total lack of hype, it didn’t feel like anything other than a regular tag team match.
2) What is the purpose of assigning a mystery partner if we are going to find out who it is three minutes, anyway?
3) Why would you give the Wolves a partner of any sort? All that does is divert the attention from where it should be: The Wolves.
They also revealed that there was a deal in place between EC III and Bro-Mans that EC III would not cash in his tag team title shot for a very long time. Upon learning of this, Mike Tenay just dismisses this act of unethical collusion by saying the equivalent of “well… that deal isn’t in place anymore.” When something similar happened in ROH, they played it off as if it was a HUGE scandal. In TNA, the babyface announcer doesn’t even bat an eyelash at unethical behavior.
ZEMA ION & THE BRO-MANS vs. THE WOLVES & SAMOA JOE- 5.25/10... but a total creative failure.
In this, the Wolves in-ring debut, they decide not to highlight the Wolves tag team work, but rather… JOE is the one who gets the hot tag and the win. THESE PEOPLE ARE F*CKING IDIOTS!
VELVET PLEADS WITH DIXIE- F*CKING IDIOTIC!
1) Despite knowing about this match for a week, Velvet Sky decided to wait until HALF WAY THROUGH THE SHOW THE MATCH IS SUPPOSED TO TAKE PLACE ON to try to get out of it.
2) Despite the myriad times we have been told that man-on-women violence is not allowed on Spike TV (it was actually AN IMPORTANT PART OF AN ANGLE AT ONE POINT!), Dixie does nothing to prevent this match. I guess she doesn’t care if they get in trouble with their TV network. Also, how the hell did this even get officially booked in the first place?
3) Velvet’s logic completely fails. She asks Dixie to cancel the match because Dixie “has always been a strong proponent of the Knockouts.” If she is a strong proponent of the Knockouts, would she WANT to see them take that next step and break down the gender barrier and start competing against male wrestlers?
4) MVP is all outraged because this match will be “a man vs. a woman.” Tell me, MVP. What is wrong with that? Are you suggesting that women are somehow inherently weaker or less physically capable or perhaps not smart enough to compete against men? Because that’s what it sounds like here. And yet, I can’t help but think that if the match were Awesome Kong against Amazing Red, no one would bad an eyelash.
If the problem is one of a size mismatch, just say so (though that is its own can of worms). If the problem is one of gender, then you need to address it in a way that isn’t sexist. The “Spike TV won’t allow it” thing actually does a fantastic job of this, but TNA decides not to use that because they are stupid.
Anyhow, you would think that, with his big objection here, MVP would actually DO SOMETHING about this match which he sees as unfair along gender lines, which is a major issue in society and booking it would certainly get TNA a lot of bad press… But no. Instead, this results in MVP saying that he isn’t a wrestler anymore… then point out that Spud is a wrestler… then booking himself against Spud… and that he will call the director’s truck to make sure that match will be next. So they are also giving away MVP’s in-ring debut in a bullsh*t match with almost no build.
WHAT THE F*CK?!
So you know how MVP, the new investor with equal power to Dixie, just said he would call the director’s truck and make sure that his match with Spud was next? Well apparently MVP has the power to hire and fire people and make matches, does not have the power to control the order of the card because the next thing on the show was…
ABYSS SPEAKS- He says that he never wanted this to happen, and calls EY out to speak with him. EY comes out and the first words he says are “I was just trying to help.”
Oh. You were just trying to “help?” Well let’s look at the end result of your help: “You took a nice, happy go-lucky lawyer and, against his desires, turned him into a psychopathic killing machine which you have now unleashed on the world. I think I speak for everyone when I say “thanks for the ‘help,’ asshole!
Joseph/Abyss was actually really awesome here. He says he doesn’t want to be Abyss anymore. EY offers to help, but Joseph says he doesn’t want EY’s help. He says that he needs to go away and fix EY’s mistake. He says he needs to find someone who truly understands him. So the big pay-off to Abyss returning is… Abyss going away again. Way to go, TNA!
CHRISTY HEMME & SAM SHAW BACKSTAGE- very good
ROCKSTAR SPUD vs. MVP- an entirely pointless squash that gains you nothing.
Taz describes MVP’s finisher as a “gang-style kick.” This would be the same MVP who has spent most of his adult life trying to DISTANCE HIMSELF from the gang lifestyle that he led in his childhood.
ROODE LOOKS FOR DIXIE BACKSTAGE- this happened last week. Snore.
WILLOW THE WISP VIDEO PACKAGE- WHY?! Just… WHY?! Jeff Hardy is one of the (if not THE) most over wrestlers on TNA’s roster. They could have him be his established, over self… or they could have him be a lunatic in a weird mask with a stupid name. TNA chooses the latter. That is really all you need to know to understand why this company is in such a sh*tty place right now.
DIXIE & ROODE BACKSTAGE- okay.
Dixie is calling someone for help. I assume that this will lead to something big. Roode interrupts her, saying she owes him a title shot and calls her a sore loser. Dixie refuses to give him a title shot. Roode warns Dixie that she doesn’t want him as her enemy.
CHRIS SABIN vs. VELVET SKY-
Sabin made fun of Velvet’s entrance by pretty much dry-humping the ropes. That was funny. Remember how MVP was clearly not okay with this match going down. Well to stop it, he… DID NOTHING! Your babyface, ladies and gentlemen: See an unfair match and a damsel in distress… and not lifting a f*cking finger.
Sabin yells at Velvet a lot and offers her the first shot. She kicks him in the knee. For some reason, the ref didn’t even ring the bell. Sabin yells at her some more, so she kicks him in the nuts… but he has a cup on, which he takes off and proudly holds up, bragging to everyone about how he outsmarted Velvet… so while he is holding the cup up and showing it off, she runs over and gives him a low blow.
I really don’t know how to rate this segment. It was fantastic (for the most part, the kick to the knee was dumb. They should have gone straight for the nut shot), with the heel definitely getting just comeuppance… but from a point of view of the company as a whole, it should never have happened and the company (and our new babyface authority figure) look like idiots and hypocrites for letting it happen in the first place.
Wait… sh*t. I spoke too soon.
Velvet starts pounding on Sabin, which was really unnecessary. It just takes away from the nut shot. Less is more. Then Alpha Female shows up (Taz and Tenay have no idea who she is, so I guess she just jumped the guardrail and no one tried to stop her) and beat Velvet up. She put he in the Masterlock, then Sabin pinned Velvet and Alpha Female counted the three (the idiot ref went down to count it, too… in a match that never even officially started. The individual components were all good, but they blew threw about six week’s worth of angles in five minutes. WHY?!
BULLY RAY GOES THROUGH ANDERSON’S STUFF BACKSTAGE- Apparently Anderson doesn’t know that the point of a “locker room” is that it is a room filled with lockers in which you can put your stuff so that no one f*cks with it. Bully pulled out Anderson’s passport (really, Ken! Anyone could walk into that room and steal your identity! That is horribly irresponsible. Haven’t you seen a single identity theft commercial on TV?!), but then put it back and took out Anderson’s phone. Apparently Ken is too dumb to set up a password for his phone, either, because Bully picks it right up and makes a long-distance call to Anderson’s house, promising Anderson’s wife that he will send Ken home to her “in a coffin” and telling her to say goodbye to his children for him. This whole thing with Anderson’s family is just not doing anything for me at all.
THE CAMERAMAN INTERVIEWS BOBBY ROODE- Roode says he flipped out in Dixie’s office, that he “can’t handle it anymore” and that “it has to come to an end.” He also says “it’s over” and that he needs to take some time to think things over. Apparently he is being kicked out of the arena on Dixie’s orders, and he seems accepting of this punishment. This was very well done, but I REALLY don’t want to see Roode turn babyface. He is BY FAR the strongest heel they have right now.
Taz and Tenay mention that Dixie apparently has an offer for MVP that she will present before the end of the shows… so once again, the big hyped up match isn’t really the main event.
CASKET MATCH: Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson- 6/10
Bully wore a Lieverpool Jersey in order to get cheap heat. This would be good under normal circumstances, but it just felt sooooo out of place with Bully’s current character. The match was decent. It got ten minutes, plus a commercial. They went at a very slow pace. Great finish, but not too much else. With just how “personal” TNA seems to want this feud to be, this really didn’t seem like a big enough blowoff.
During this match, Taz and Tenay spoil the fact that Dixie’s offer to MVP will be a buyout offer. Does anyone really think there is a chance in hell of MVP accepting this?
DIXIE OFFERS TO BUY MVP OUT- he refuses. Who could have seen that coming?
MVP counters by offering to but his shares of the company up against Dixie’s at Lethal Lockdown… so they are going to blow this off after LESS THAN A MONTH AND A HALF?!
Dixie refused the offer at first, but then it seemed like she accepted it, so I really have no idea whether the match was made or not. This was a horribly over-scripted segment with a horribly confusing result.
A terrible show from TNA. They have NO F*CKING IDEA how to hype matches. They didn’t even try. They just kept making a match and then announcing that that match would be next. They only went into the show with TWO matches announced, and one of those was an intergender match which Spike’s rules do not allow, so how it got booked was a mystery. They f*cked the Wolves debut up horrendously, wasted MVP’s debut, and failed at pretty much everything they tried. They feel the need to make absolutely everything on the show about MVP vs. Dixie, and as a result, it is suffocating everything else.
STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Tenay mentions that Taz has called the Wolves “legit.”
As opposed to what? Some sort of fake wrestlers? Why the f*ck would you ever say something like this? It doesn’t help the Wolves and it just sh*ts on everyone else!
2. Taz notes that the beginning of MVP’s music “kind of had a Godzilla feel to it.”
In four and a half years in TNA, he has never once said that about Joe’s music, which ACTUALLY HAS THE GODZILLA THEME in the beginning of it.
3. “Professor” Tenay believes that Spud saying that he has “a bit of artful dodger” in him is a reference to a gang of some sort, rather than some osrt of reference to British wrestling.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
once again we find ourselves on different sides, i loved this show, i marked out several times actually.
but i know how you feel, i feel that way every monday night
but i know how you feel, i feel that way every monday night

- Big Red Machine
- Posts: 27378
- Joined: Dec 16th, '10, 15:12
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
Really? Not to call you out or anything because your opinion is your opinion and all... but I cannot see how you could possibly view this show as having been good, well-booked, or constructive in any way.cero2k wrote:once again we find ourselves on different sides, i loved this show, i marked out several times actually.
but i know how you feel, i feel that way every monday night
And comparing that to Raw...
Care to do your own review of the show?
Hold #712: ARM BAR!
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
not a full review, but here's an idea on how i see impact.Big Red Machine wrote:Really? Not to call you out or anything because your opinion is your opinion and all... but I cannot see how you could possibly view this show as having been good, well-booked, or constructive in any way.cero2k wrote:once again we find ourselves on different sides, i loved this show, i marked out several times actually.
but i know how you feel, i feel that way every monday night
And comparing that to Raw...
Care to do your own review of the show?
Opening segment:
man i'm getting tired of authority stables opening shows every week, but just watching Dixie, Spud, and ECIII is a treat, i'd watch a spinoff series if it came out. Magnus was good, Dixie's reaction to the president being under the champ was nice. MVP was great, i love how he counters DIxie, he's lines come out as a real couple one upping each other. Gunner was good, even if it's Gunner, he seems really imposing while holding a title shot contract, like something to worry about. we get a ladder match between ECIII and Gunner for both briefcases. I'm worried about the outcome.
ECIII vs Gunner -> ECIII/Magnus vs Gunner and Storm
no more than 10 minutes ago, MVP said that if anyone interfere in the match, he would have to do something about it, and Magnus still came out. Loved how MVP was like 'really? I JUST said that there wouldn't be any interference!'. match was good for what it was, kinda sucks that ECIII lost the contract, but i makes sense since he's bigger than the tag titles now and when he turns face, he needs to go against Magnus. on the other side, this way Gunner can lose the title shot next week and still get some titles down the line. I only worry that this will keep the titles away from the Wolves for a while longer.
On the match itself. I have no problem the match being thrown out, refs didn't stop it, but it got 'thrown out' since MVP said 'NO INTERFERENCE' and he himself restarted as a tag match, i'm happy with that. When it came to the end, it's obvious that there would be a drift between Magnus and ECIII, they haven't been liking each other for a while now. I did wonder if Gunner and Storm would go back to the team problems tho.
Anderson Promo - ok
BroMans, Spud, Ion and MVP - great! Spud, BroMans like always awesome, Ion and MVP were good. MVP mentioned that bringing in lawyers and interest of fairness would mean stripping the titles from BroMans, not sure what he meant, unless they haven't defended in 30 days. good segment, MVP announces The Wolves will get a mystery partner.
Zema/BroMans vs Wolves and Joe - great match!
Marked out at the idea of the wolves and joe teaming. Good showing for the debut of the wolves, the match was short, but still good. Joe gets the win, since well, he's the No 1 Contender to the World Title. Wolves hint that they're going for the titles. awesome!
Velve/Dixie/MVP stuff - good. must have missed the video where Sabin requested the match. Velvet was good, Dixie was great and heelish, and MVP comment at the end was the exact comment i needed to hear from him, I was wondering if he would overturn Dixie's ruling, but just going like 'dafuck are you doing?' was great. that should be an interesting segment.
Spud then got in MVP's face and MVP figured it was a good chance to debut.
ABYSS/EY Stuff - AWESOME! Maskless Abyss under the hood is sooo creepy, he looks like he's gonna rape someone on a back alley. EY was awesome here, reminded me why i've always liked serious EY. I was wondering if EY would continue feuding with Abyss or finalize the TNA version of Team Hell No, but it seems Abyss is gonna be taking some time off now. Hope we don't get less EY because of this. The intensity on this segment was off the charts.
Samuel Shaw/Hemme stuff - good, i really wonder how this will end keeping Shaw an in-ring competitor and Hemme alive.
Spud vs MVP - the squash i was expecting. MVP seems to be in great shape. glad i get to see him ballin' again.
Roode/Dixie stuff - holy shit that was intense too, Roode getting on Dixie's face was nerve-wrecking, i felt Dixie couldn't stop herself and wanted to kiss Roode. Dixie being heelish and making sense at the same time. good. Plus i love how Dixie, even though she's the president, still fears the wrestlers because of the physicality.
Willow is coming. at least his promos have gotten better. wonder if TNA will acknowledge this is Hardy, this whole thing made me wish that Hardy lost some kind of 'loser leaves town' match against Magnus, and he would come back as Willow during the X Division contract tourny and win it, later on revealing he was Hardy and he had a contract. surely we all know Willow is Hardy, but who cares? Anyway, interested to see where this goes
Sabin vs Velvet - velvet and sabin were both good, velvet botch the first kick, Sabin handled it perfectly. I can only see this segment with Aries saving Velvet or someone returning to save Velvet. I was wrong, I"M MARKING OUT! THE MOTHERFUCKING ALPHA FEMALE! YES! YES! YES! kinda wished that she didn't debut as a muscle bodyguard, since we already have Tapa, but as the calculating powerhouse AKA lady bane that she is. still pretty happy that she's here, and i can totally see Sabin with a chick bodyguard and a she's a great counter to Aries too.
Bully ray stuff - great, still the amazing heel that he's been in the last 2 yrs. Anderson should be more careful with his stuff.
bobby roode stuff. wait, is he taking time off too? dang is this gonna become an x division show now?
casket match - great match, i'd give it between 6-7.5/10. Loved that powerbomb on the table, vicious. only thing i didn't like was the casket they got, it's weird to me when the lid comes completely off.
Dixie/MVP last segment - both were good. I'm worried that they have rushed this match but to be honest, i can't remember how much it took for Flair and Vince to have this match either, but it's more than enough time, and i guess this will end up with MVP staying as a wrestler and Dixie keeping control. Also LOVED mvp and dixie fighting all show about the flowers on the table, that was golden
see Red, I really don't care if things get promoted beforehand, way i see it, i watch impact because i really don't know what to expect from the show other than small hints like one or two matches announced. On the other hand, and i can't not compare with WWE, but the last 4 shows i've known that Orton is gonna fight Bryan, Cena, Christian, Cesaro, and Sheamus (i honestly don't care about anything else in the show, they fucked up my liking the tag division, i hate that shield vs wyatts is all about Reigns, Emma's debut was horrible, Lesnar is missing, Authority sucks, i just can't take wwe right now), so WWE announcing what they're doing just makes me not wanna watch at all, Orton/Bryan and Orton/Cena i've seen a million times already, Orton/Christian is boring, Orton/Cesaro was the only one i wondered about but i figured that Orton would win, after reading the results, THEN i decided to watch the match. Orton/Sheamus also sounds boring so i'll be missing that too. Only Raw i'm expecting to watch between today and WM is the night after EC and the Chicago one (are they the same?) . So having things promoted before the show is not necessarily good
With TNA, i just come in to enjoy the show, if i'm gonna care about the little things in booking, I wouldn't never watch a WWE/TNA/ROH products ever again. This show was entertaining, most stories advanced in a good way, with some of them potentially ending. Wrestling was decent for a thursday night show, when i need to satisfy my in-ring quality, i turn to New Japan and PWG really.

- Big Red Machine
- Posts: 27378
- Joined: Dec 16th, '10, 15:12
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
I want TNA to succeed, and they're doing sh*t that is just plain not a recipe for success. They aren't doing anything at all to make me CARE about their characters. At the moment, as CHARACTERS, I care about The Wolves (who came in looking like badasses), Velvet Sky, Chris Sabin, and James Storm (and to a lesser extent, Samoa Joe and Gunner). No one else is doing anything that this both interesting and doesn't have any glaring flaws that ruin it for me. I enjoy Spud in his role, but I don't care what happens to him. I was liking MVP in his role until some of his comments this week.cero2k wrote:
see Red, I really don't care if things get promoted beforehand, way i see it, i watch impact because i really don't know what to expect from the show other than small hints like one or two matches announced. On the other hand, and i can't not compare with WWE, but the last 4 shows i've known that Orton is gonna fight Bryan, Cena, Christian, Cesaro, and Sheamus (i honestly don't care about anything else in the show, they F'ed up my liking the tag division, i hate that shield vs wyatts is all about Reigns, Emma's debut was horrible, Lesnar is missing, Authority sucks, i just can't take wwe right now), so WWE announcing what they're doing just makes me not wanna watch at all, Orton/Bryan and Orton/Cena i've seen a million times already, Orton/Christian is boring, Orton/Cesaro was the only one i wondered about but i figured that Orton would win, after reading the results, THEN i decided to watch the match. Orton/Sheamus also sounds boring so i'll be missing that too. Only Raw i'm expecting to watch between today and WM is the night after EC and the Chicago one (are they the same?) . So having things promoted before the show is not necessarily good
With TNA, i just come in to enjoy the show, if i'm gonna care about the little things in booking, I wouldn't never watch a WWE/TNA/ROH products ever again. This show was entertaining, most stories advanced in a good way, with some of them potentially ending. Wrestling was decent for a thursday night show, when i need to satisfy my in-ring quality, i turn to New Japan and PWG really.
On Raw, on the other hand, I care about pretty much everyone aside from Batista, Del Rio, Fandango, Miz, Ryback, and Axel. I want to know who will come out of the Elimination Chamber with the WWE Title. I want to know whether the Shield will be able to work together. I want to know what the Wyatt's are up do, what, if anything, Bray's cryptic statements mean. Is he speaking in riddles, or is he just a lunatic spouting nonsense that happens to hit home. I want to see Daniel Bryan prove that he can be the face of the WWE, I want to see those plucky Usos win the tag titles. I want to see Emma get her revenge on Summer Rae for ripping up her sign, and I want to see Alexander Rusev show up and CRUSH people.
Orton running the gauntlet of his EC opponents? That's an ongoing story that I can get into. When he lost to Dragon, I assumed that all of them would beat him, but when he beat Christian on SD, I had no idea which way any of the matches were going to go. He lost to Cena, but I had no idea which way the Cesaro match would go, and I have no idea whether or not he'll beat Sheamus. (I agree with you that Brock not being around is BS and makes no sense).
I will take great wrestling wherever I can get it (for the most part, I normally won't go out of my way for stuff that isn't in English and/or semi-easily accessible), but I like American wrestling the most because that is where there is the potential for bigger, overarching stories and in-ring action to combine into the awesome product that I love (Lucha has this, too, but I don't speak Spanish). When I watch it, that is what I want. It's not about picking every little thing apart, but when something jumps out at me and interferes with my enjoyment of the story, I'm going to comment out it. When something in the overall art disappoints me, I'm going to comment on it.
I've seen Orton vs. Cena just as many times as you have. Their match on Raw was awesome! So was Orton's match with Dragon. Orton and Christian have also had awesome matches in the past, so I was excited for that one. I was excited for Cesaro and Orton, and I am excited for Orton and Sheamus. Things on Raw get me excited to see who will win or what will happen. Things on Impact make me dread whatever stupid finish TNA will surely do.
I also think you are looking at Shield vs. Wyatts all wrong. It's not about Reigns. It's about whether the Shield can work together despite the fact that there seem to be rifts forming between them.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
I too want TNA to succeed, hell, i'm the guy that would wish to a genie that TNA would destroy WWE. But i think this is where we are in opposing teams, to me it's WWE that has lost me when it comes to stories and characters.Big Red Machine wrote: I want TNA to succeed, and they're doing sh*t that is just plain not a recipe for success. They aren't doing anything at all to make me CARE about their characters. At the moment, as CHARACTERS, I care about The Wolves (who came in looking like badasses), Velvet Sky, Chris Sabin, and James Storm (and to a lesser extent, Samoa Joe and Gunner). No one else is doing anything that this both interesting and doesn't have any glaring flaws that ruin it for me. I enjoy Spud in his role, but I don't care what happens to him. I was liking MVP in his role until some of his comments this week.
On Raw, on the other hand, I care about pretty much everyone aside from Batista, Del Rio, Fandango, Miz, Ryback, and Axel. I want to know who will come out of the Elimination Chamber with the WWE Title. I want to know whether the Shield will be able to work together. I want to know what the Wyatt's are up do, what, if anything, Bray's cryptic statements mean. Is he speaking in riddles, or is he just a lunatic spouting nonsense that happens to hit home. I want to see Daniel Bryan prove that he can be the face of the WWE, I want to see those plucky Usos win the tag titles. I want to see Emma get her revenge on Summer Rae for ripping up her sign, and I want to see Alexander Rusev show up and CRUSH people.
Dragon: I've been waiting for the payoff since Summeslam, at this point, especially after RR, i really don't care, it won't be the same, giving him the title will be like 'here have it, stop complaining'.
the Authority? i don't care about them either anymore, it's become the most fair and unbiased authority ever, they don't have a champion, they kinda just talk with no substance.
Ziggler, Del Rio, Lesnar, Punk, Barrett. all my favorite wrestlers are either gone or being fed to someone else for WM season
The only one i'm keeping my eye on is Cesaro, because the name change and the sudden push seems promising, but i'll hold my judgment til after WM.
Shield? i love them, don't get me wrong, but i just can't help seeing how anything that happens with them is to push Reigns at the expense of everyone else. REIGNSWINSLOL
Wyatts? it's like nothing ever happens with them, none of their stories have fulfilled. not kane, not bryan, not cena, nothing.
TNA on the other hand, in addition to guys like Roode, Joe, Shaw, ECIII, Wolves, Abyss, who i really wanna see where they take their stories, i have a bunch of guys that while i may not really care where they go, i LOVE seeing them on screen, Dixie, Spud, Sabin, BroMans, Bully Ray, just for pure entertainment, it may not be necessarily wrestling, but i enjoy their stuff and segments.
yeah, the matches were good, but i didn't care about them until i saw the reviews, hyping any of those matches didn't do anything for me to get me to watch, it was the day after that i considered watching the match.Big Red Machine wrote: I've seen Orton vs. Cena just as many times as you have. Their match on Raw was awesome! So was Orton's match with Dragon. Orton and Christian have also had awesome matches in the past, so I was excited for that one. I was excited for Cesaro and Orton, and I am excited for Orton and Sheamus. Things on Raw get me excited to see who will win or what will happen. Things on Impact make me dread whatever stupid finish TNA will surely do.
yeah, i know kayfabe wise is about that, it's a dream match to be honest, but this is one of those feuds that i just can't ignore the non-kayfabe and i know it'a all about making Reigns look like Superman, one or two years further this dude is gonna be the new Cena getting shoved down our throats. When i watched the 'staredown' two weeks ago, just having Reigns be the one taking the first step always kinda tells them that it's about making him look good, and this may be my indy mark inside talking, but he has shit on Ambrose character wise, and shit on Rollins wrestling wise. I don't enjoy it, it's like going back and watching Cena make Jericho or Angle tap out. I can't eat that shit.Big Red Machine wrote: I also think you are looking at Shield vs. Wyatts all wrong. It's not about Reigns. It's about whether the Shield can work together despite the fact that there seem to be rifts forming between them.

- Big Red Machine
- Posts: 27378
- Joined: Dec 16th, '10, 15:12
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
1. You have a point with Dragon winning the belt possibly feeling like "here have it, stop complaining," if they make it feel that way. But if they work it into an angle well, though, it will feel like Dragon (and US!) triumphing over the machine. If they just put the belt on him in the chamber, it will be the former. If they have him win his way into the Mnaia match and win it, or win a title shot at Mania by beating Hunter and then go into Seattle at Extreme Rules and beat an Authority-backed Batista, it will be the latter.cero2k wrote:I too want TNA to succeed, hell, i'm the guy that would wish to a genie that TNA would destroy WWE. But i think this is where we are in opposing teams, to me it's WWE that has lost me when it comes to stories and characters.Big Red Machine wrote: I want TNA to succeed, and they're doing sh*t that is just plain not a recipe for success. They aren't doing anything at all to make me CARE about their characters. At the moment, as CHARACTERS, I care about The Wolves (who came in looking like badasses), Velvet Sky, Chris Sabin, and James Storm (and to a lesser extent, Samoa Joe and Gunner). No one else is doing anything that this both interesting and doesn't have any glaring flaws that ruin it for me. I enjoy Spud in his role, but I don't care what happens to him. I was liking MVP in his role until some of his comments this week.
On Raw, on the other hand, I care about pretty much everyone aside from Batista, Del Rio, Fandango, Miz, Ryback, and Axel. I want to know who will come out of the Elimination Chamber with the WWE Title. I want to know whether the Shield will be able to work together. I want to know what the Wyatt's are up do, what, if anything, Bray's cryptic statements mean. Is he speaking in riddles, or is he just a lunatic spouting nonsense that happens to hit home. I want to see Daniel Bryan prove that he can be the face of the WWE, I want to see those plucky Usos win the tag titles. I want to see Emma get her revenge on Summer Rae for ripping up her sign, and I want to see Alexander Rusev show up and CRUSH people.
Dragon: I've been waiting for the payoff since Summeslam, at this point, especially after RR, i really don't care, it won't be the same, giving him the title will be like 'here have it, stop complaining'.
the Authority? i don't care about them either anymore, it's become the most fair and unbiased authority ever, they don't have a champion, they kinda just talk with no substance.
Ziggler, Del Rio, Lesnar, Punk, Barrett. all my favorite wrestlers are either gone or being fed to someone else for WM season
The only one i'm keeping my eye on is Cesaro, because the name change and the sudden push seems promising, but i'll hold my judgment til after WM.
Shield? i love them, don't get me wrong, but i just can't help seeing how anything that happens with them is to push Reigns at the expense of everyone else. REIGNSWINSLOL
Wyatts? it's like nothing ever happens with them, none of their stories have fulfilled. not kane, not bryan, not cena, nothing.
TNA on the other hand, in addition to guys like Roode, Joe, Shaw, ECIII, Wolves, Abyss, who i really wanna see where they take their stories, i have a bunch of guys that while i may not really care where they go, i LOVE seeing them on screen, Dixie, Spud, Sabin, BroMans, Bully Ray, just for pure entertainment, it may not be necessarily wrestling, but i enjoy their stuff and segments.
2. The Authority not being overtly evil and unfair is a breath of fresh air for me. We know they are heels in the overall scheme of things because they are trying to keep Dragon down and they treated Big Show like sh*t and may or may not have instructed the Outlaws to screw Punk and then helped the Outlaws screw Cody & Goldust... but they are, in most cases, being pretty fair (I tried to get a similar vibe going with Heyman in my fantasy booking). They really are doing what they think is "best for business," rather than pooping on Dragon because they are being egotistical heels. Compare them to Dixie who had a disagreement with AJ Styles over a contract, which then caused the magic switch in her head to flip from "good" to "evil" and now she is hates all of the babyfaces. Which one of them is more real and human?
3. I'm not saying WWE isn't making some big mistakes. I'd love to see all of those guys be on top of the card. I'm saying that WWE has taken guys that I really didn't care too much for like Goldust, Titus O'Neil, the Usos, and Jack Swagger, and they have made me care about the outcomes of their matches and where their characters go.
4. For the Shield stuff... (and yes, I know this is silly coming from me), but you're being too... (for lack of a better word) smarky... about it. You're too focused on the destination to enjoy the journey. They have done a good job recently trying to develop Rollins and especially Ambrose into their own personalities that won't just die off when the group breaks up and Reigns gets a huge push.
5. I agree with you about the Wyatts (I'm the guy who is still waiting to find out what the "real reason" was for Nexus taking out The Undertaker that Otunga threatened Barrett with revealing) but I'm willing to give them a bit more time on the Wyatt front.
6. With Abyss, they killed it for me the moment they decided that Joseph Park and Abyss were the same person because THEY HAD THEM IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME TWICE IN THE SUMMER OF 2012. That, to me, is an absolutely inexcusable and offensive lack of attention to their art. Add in all of the horridly obvious questions that this angle has produced that have gone not just unanswered, but completely unacknowledged, and it just kills Abyss for me. I can never care about him anymore.
While that is an extreme example, TNA does so much stuff like that that just plain doesn't make sense (the Roode-Angle thing is another example, but on a smaller scale) that completely take me out of their stories and make me not care about their characters. I really don't even care that much about Joe just because they haven't really done anything with him. he showed up one day and won a match that gave him #1 contendership. There was no build. No reason for me to care about Joe anymore. Yeah, Spud is entertaining, but the stooge being entertaining is, to me, a bonus. That's a background detail that brings a segment up from being good to being great. If the segment sucks and the angle it i part of sucks, Spud being entertaining doesn't make it worthwhile to me.
As for EC III, I really don't see what anyone sees in him. He's been a f*cking chickensh*t heel, and now, all of a sudden and I am supposed to feel sorry for him because Magnus is snubbing EC III's contributions to Magnus' won chickensh*t activities? I much prefer Bro-Mans who manage to be simultaneously annoying and hilarious and TNA isn't asking me to all of a sudden buy them as top talent. We all know that they are paper champions and thus I can't wait to see them get in their with the Wolves with the titles on the line because I know the Wolves will tear them apart, and they are such great heels that I will relish seeing it happen.
That's your own jaded-ness or cynicism or being "tired of it" or whatever (which is totally fine because it's your opinion), but consider this: the next time they advertise Orton vs. Dragon or Orton vs. Cena, are you going to want to see it any more because of how good these matches were?cero2k wrote:yeah, the matches were good, but i didn't care about them until i saw the reviews, hyping any of those matches didn't do anything for me to get me to watch, it was the day after that i considered watching the match..Big Red Machine wrote: I've seen Orton vs. Cena just as many times as you have. Their match on Raw was awesome! So was Orton's match with Dragon. Orton and Christian have also had awesome matches in the past, so I was excited for that one. I was excited for Cesaro and Orton, and I am excited for Orton and Sheamus. Things on Raw get me excited to see who will win or what will happen. Things on Impact make me dread whatever stupid finish TNA will surely do.
"All about making Reigns look like Superman"... you think the Shield is going to win?cero2k wrote:yeah, i know kayfabe wise is about that, it's a dream match to be honest, but this is one of those feuds that i just can't ignore the non-kayfabe and i know it'a all about making Reigns look like Superman, one or two years further this dude is gonna be the new Cena getting shoved down our throats. When i watched the 'staredown' two weeks ago, just having Reigns be the one taking the first step always kinda tells them that it's about making him look good, and this may be my indy mark inside talking, but he has s**t on Ambrose character wise, and s**t on Rollins wrestling wise. I don't enjoy it, it's like going back and watching Cena make Jericho or Angle tap out. I can't eat that s**t.Big Red Machine wrote: I also think you are looking at Shield vs. Wyatts all wrong. It's not about Reigns. It's about whether the Shield can work together despite the fact that there seem to be rifts forming between them.
I loved Reigns taking the first step. Reigns going first makes him more of a babyface for being willing to fight. The team is clearly having problems with each other,but Rollins and Ambrose followed Reigns every step of the way because they are still a team and they are going to stand together!
They're not crapping on the other two. They just aren't pushing them as babyfaces. I think you'll start to see more from Rollins and Ambrose after they lose at Elimination Chamber and begin to bicker over whose fault it was.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
1. at this point, i think that's the only desirable solution, for Bryan to defeat Batista, it's not against Orton anymore, he NEEDS to defeat Batista.Big Red Machine wrote: 1. You have a point with Dragon winning the belt possibly feeling like "here have it, stop complaining," if they make it feel that way. But if they work it into an angle well, though, it will feel like Dragon (and US!) triumphing over the machine. If they just put the belt on him in the chamber, it will be the former. If they have him win his way into the Mnaia match and win it, or win a title shot at Mania by beating Hunter and then go into Seattle at Extreme Rules and beat an Authority-backed Batista, it will be the latter.
2. The Authority not being overtly evil and unfair is a breath of fresh air for me. We know they are heels in the overall scheme of things because they are trying to keep Dragon down and they treated Big Show like sh*t and may or may not have instructed the Outlaws to screw Punk and then helped the Outlaws screw Cody & Goldust... but they are, in most cases, being pretty fair (I tried to get a similar vibe going with Heyman in my fantasy booking). They really are doing what they think is "best for business," rather than pooping on Dragon because they are being egotistical heels. Compare them to Dixie who had a disagreement with AJ Styles over a contract, which then caused the magic switch in her head to flip from "good" to "evil" and now she is hates all of the babyfaces. Which one of them is more real and human?
3. I'm not saying WWE isn't making some big mistakes. I'd love to see all of those guys be on top of the card. I'm saying that WWE has taken guys that I really didn't care too much for like Goldust, Titus O'Neil, the Usos, and Jack Swagger, and they have made me care about the outcomes of their matches and where their characters go.
4. For the Shield stuff... (and yes, I know this is silly coming from me), but you're being too... (for lack of a better word) smarky... about it. You're too focused on the destination to enjoy the journey. They have done a good job recently trying to develop Rollins and especially Ambrose into their own personalities that won't just die off when the group breaks up and Reigns gets a huge push.
5. I agree with you about the Wyatts (I'm the guy who is still waiting to find out what the "real reason" was for Nexus taking out The Undertaker that Otunga threatened Barrett with revealing) but I'm willing to give them a bit more time on the Wyatt front.
6. With Abyss, they killed it for me the moment they decided that Joseph Park and Abyss were the same person because THEY HAD THEM IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME TWICE IN THE SUMMER OF 2012. That, to me, is an absolutely inexcusable and offensive lack of attention to their art. Add in all of the horridly obvious questions that this angle has produced that have gone not just unanswered, but completely unacknowledged, and it just kills Abyss for me. I can never care about him anymore.
While that is an extreme example, TNA does so much stuff like that that just plain doesn't make sense (the Roode-Angle thing is another example, but on a smaller scale) that completely take me out of their stories and make me not care about their characters. I really don't even care that much about Joe just because they haven't really done anything with him. he showed up one day and won a match that gave him #1 contendership. There was no build. No reason for me to care about Joe anymore. Yeah, Spud is entertaining, but the stooge being entertaining is, to me, a bonus. That's a background detail that brings a segment up from being good to being great. If the segment sucks and the angle it i part of sucks, Spud being entertaining doesn't make it worthwhile to me.
As for EC III, I really don't see what anyone sees in him. He's been a f*cking chickensh*t heel, and now, all of a sudden and I am supposed to feel sorry for him because Magnus is snubbing EC III's contributions to Magnus' won chickensh*t activities? I much prefer Bro-Mans who manage to be simultaneously annoying and hilarious and TNA isn't asking me to all of a sudden buy them as top talent. We all know that they are paper champions and thus I can't wait to see them get in their with the Wolves with the titles on the line because I know the Wolves will tear them apart, and they are such great heels that I will relish seeing it happen.
2. I kinda feel that this is the wrong case for unbiased characters, since they first started out as heels. Steph and Hunter are a group that i already want to hate, but i can't since they're being fair sometimes, if they had done this with Maddox it would be great, but with Steph and Hunter i just can't take their unbiased characters.
3. yeah, it hasn't been all bad, but for every good Big E story, you get a Ziggler, you know what i mean?
4. yeah, definitely being smarky here. don't get me wrong, i like the little things that have been making Reigns look strong, but sometimes i think it's a bit too much, or too soon for it. Reigns breaking Kane's record for instance, i would be 100% ok with this, but i felt it was too soon. And i'm sure they're not gonna bury ambrose and rollings here, i just have little fate on creative here. A story i've been reading on the internet fantasy bookings is that Shield should break up in a triple threat for the US title, where Reigns spears Ambrose, but Rollins Blackouts Reigns taking the pin on ambrose, that way Reigns and Ambrose can continue while Rollins takes the US title route for now. I just don't see something like this happening. But i'll give you this one, like Cesaro, i'll hold my final judgment until WM
6. Abyss, yeah i'll give you that one, but at least i'm willing to forget that knowing that the story finally got somewhere, and it's something that i can get behind, like i said, i liked how Abyss and Parks are kinda merged now. the fact is that Abyss as a character had stopped being relevant for a while, he had not much left for him, Joseph was a breath of air that was good, but it also ran its course, i really can't think how they could keep either relevant without doing something like this.
Joe, he didn't just come out of nowhere, he had been involved as a 'friend of AJ' stuff and he won the match to become No 1 contender, plus it's Joe, he's someone i like enough to not really need an excuse to care about him as No 1 contender. it's like if Punk right now became No 1 contender, i'd be ok with that because Punk is a main eventer and i like him.
ECIII, it's not about Magnus' snubbing, but about Dixie's, that's the one that will build up ECIII's turn, and he's a great talent, his work during segments is fantastic, his facial expressions, and he's not that bad of a wrestler.
Something i feel about TNA ever since Hogan left and A&8s died is kinda like a clean slate, i'm willing to look past some of the long ass stories that they have if they get somewhere right now. There's a bunch of stuff that would be inconsistent since they have gone through three bookers on the same storyline. But at least since the AJ angle, i've been more forgetful on anything that happened prior to that.
maybe i will, depending what's on the line, but to be honest, even 5 star matches get repetitive after a while. Tanahashi/Okada for the last two years have been great, but believe me that if they announce another one, i'm not gonna rush to watch it, it will go to the queue, it will be good, but after 5 or 6, these matches start to lose the epicness in them. Same thing happened with Punk/Cena or last year's Shield/Hell No matches, after a while, as good as they are, they're kinda the same.Big Red Machine wrote:
That's your own jaded-ness or cynicism or being "tired of it" or whatever (which is totally fine because it's your opinion), but consider this: the next time they advertise Orton vs. Dragon or Orton vs. Cena, are you going to want to see it any more because of how good these matches were?
yeah, those points are true, again it's my smarkiness that doesn't wanna get Reigns shoved down my throat. I already like him, i don't need him to become the Samoan Superman. But i still don't like Reigns taking the fist step, something i liked about Shield (and actually the first stages of Nexus) is that cohesiveness, everyone wanting to fight and stepping in at the same time, I wanna see Rollins or Ambrose doing more for the team, either sacrificing themselves for the team or something. I don't want Reigns always being the one that has to save the team.Big Red Machine wrote: "All about making Reigns look like Superman"... you think the Shield is going to win?
I loved Reigns taking the first step. Reigns going first makes him more of a babyface for being willing to fight. The team is clearly having problems with each other,but Rollins and Ambrose followed Reigns every step of the way because they are still a team and they are going to stand together!
They're not crapping on the other two. They just aren't pushing them as babyfaces. I think you'll start to see more from Rollins and Ambrose after they lose at Elimination Chamber and begin to bicker over whose fault it was.

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Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
2. But only started out being biased against a few people. You are supposed to dislike Hunter and Steph, but that doens't mean they can't still be fair. So long as they are biased against Dragon or the Rhodes Brothers or some other babyfaces, you can dislike them.cero2k wrote:1. at this point, i think that's the only desirable solution, for Bryan to defeat Batista, it's not against Orton anymore, he NEEDS to defeat Batista.Big Red Machine wrote: 1. You have a point with Dragon winning the belt possibly feeling like "here have it, stop complaining," if they make it feel that way. But if they work it into an angle well, though, it will feel like Dragon (and US!) triumphing over the machine. If they just put the belt on him in the chamber, it will be the former. If they have him win his way into the Mnaia match and win it, or win a title shot at Mania by beating Hunter and then go into Seattle at Extreme Rules and beat an Authority-backed Batista, it will be the latter.
2. The Authority not being overtly evil and unfair is a breath of fresh air for me. We know they are heels in the overall scheme of things because they are trying to keep Dragon down and they treated Big Show like sh*t and may or may not have instructed the Outlaws to screw Punk and then helped the Outlaws screw Cody & Goldust... but they are, in most cases, being pretty fair (I tried to get a similar vibe going with Heyman in my fantasy booking). They really are doing what they think is "best for business," rather than pooping on Dragon because they are being egotistical heels. Compare them to Dixie who had a disagreement with AJ Styles over a contract, which then caused the magic switch in her head to flip from "good" to "evil" and now she is hates all of the babyfaces. Which one of them is more real and human?
3. I'm not saying WWE isn't making some big mistakes. I'd love to see all of those guys be on top of the card. I'm saying that WWE has taken guys that I really didn't care too much for like Goldust, Titus O'Neil, the Usos, and Jack Swagger, and they have made me care about the outcomes of their matches and where their characters go.
4. For the Shield stuff... (and yes, I know this is silly coming from me), but you're being too... (for lack of a better word) smarky... about it. You're too focused on the destination to enjoy the journey. They have done a good job recently trying to develop Rollins and especially Ambrose into their own personalities that won't just die off when the group breaks up and Reigns gets a huge push.
5. I agree with you about the Wyatts (I'm the guy who is still waiting to find out what the "real reason" was for Nexus taking out The Undertaker that Otunga threatened Barrett with revealing) but I'm willing to give them a bit more time on the Wyatt front.
6. With Abyss, they killed it for me the moment they decided that Joseph Park and Abyss were the same person because THEY HAD THEM IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME TWICE IN THE SUMMER OF 2012. That, to me, is an absolutely inexcusable and offensive lack of attention to their art. Add in all of the horridly obvious questions that this angle has produced that have gone not just unanswered, but completely unacknowledged, and it just kills Abyss for me. I can never care about him anymore.
While that is an extreme example, TNA does so much stuff like that that just plain doesn't make sense (the Roode-Angle thing is another example, but on a smaller scale) that completely take me out of their stories and make me not care about their characters. I really don't even care that much about Joe just because they haven't really done anything with him. he showed up one day and won a match that gave him #1 contendership. There was no build. No reason for me to care about Joe anymore. Yeah, Spud is entertaining, but the stooge being entertaining is, to me, a bonus. That's a background detail that brings a segment up from being good to being great. If the segment sucks and the angle it i part of sucks, Spud being entertaining doesn't make it worthwhile to me.
As for EC III, I really don't see what anyone sees in him. He's been a f*cking chickensh*t heel, and now, all of a sudden and I am supposed to feel sorry for him because Magnus is snubbing EC III's contributions to Magnus' won chickensh*t activities? I much prefer Bro-Mans who manage to be simultaneously annoying and hilarious and TNA isn't asking me to all of a sudden buy them as top talent. We all know that they are paper champions and thus I can't wait to see them get in their with the Wolves with the titles on the line because I know the Wolves will tear them apart, and they are such great heels that I will relish seeing it happen.
2. I kinda feel that this is the wrong case for unbiased characters, since they first started out as heels. Steph and Hunter are a group that i already want to hate, but i can't since they're being fair sometimes, if they had done this with Maddox it would be great, but with Steph and Hunter i just can't take their unbiased characters.
3. yeah, it hasn't been all bad, but for every good Big E story, you get a Ziggler, you know what i mean?
4. yeah, definitely being smarky here. don't get me wrong, i like the little things that have been making Reigns look strong, but sometimes i think it's a bit too much, or too soon for it. Reigns breaking Kane's record for instance, i would be 100% ok with this, but i felt it was too soon. And i'm sure they're not gonna bury ambrose and rollings here, i just have little fate on creative here. A story i've been reading on the internet fantasy bookings is that Shield should break up in a triple threat for the US title, where Reigns spears Ambrose, but Rollins Blackouts Reigns taking the pin on ambrose, that way Reigns and Ambrose can continue while Rollins takes the US title route for now. I just don't see something like this happening. But i'll give you this one, like Cesaro, i'll hold my final judgment until WM
6. Abyss, yeah i'll give you that one, but at least i'm willing to forget that knowing that the story finally got somewhere, and it's something that i can get behind, like i said, i liked how Abyss and Parks are kinda merged now.
Joe, he didn't just come out of nowhere, he had been involved as a 'friend of AJ' stuff and he won the match to become No 1 contender, plus it's Joe, he's someone i like enough to not really need an excuse to care about him as No 1 contender. it's like if Punk right now became No 1 contender, i'd be ok with that because Punk is a main eventer and i like him.
ECIII, it's not about Magnus' snubbing, but about Dixie's, that's the one that will build up ECIII's turn, and he's a great talent, his work during segments is fantastic, his facial expressions, and he's not that bad of a wrestler.
6. The thing with Joe is that he has been in that situation so many times that the (for lack of a better term) "residual caring" I had for him has worn off. I have a tremendous amount of respect for Joe's talents as a wrestler and I think he would make a great champion, but I have no real desire to see Samoa Joe the character as TNA World Heavyweight Champion.
On EC III- the point is that he has been a chickensh*t heel. I don't care if he isn't getting credit he might rightfully deserve for heelish acts because he has been taking credit he doesn't rightfully deserve for so long. There is some peotic justice here, but it is being delivered tom one heel y another heel. They might be doing a great job telling their story from a purely artistic point of view, but as a fan I don't care about the situation at all.
Fair enough.cero2k wrote:maybe i will, depending what's on the line, but to be honest, even 5 star matches get repetitive after a while. Tanahashi/Okada for the last two years have been great, but believe me that if they announce another one, i'm not gonna rush to watch it, it will go to the queue, it will be good, but after 5 or 6, these matches start to lose the epicness in them. Same thing happened with Punk/Cena or last year's Shield/Hell No matches, after a while, as good as they are, they're kinda the same.Big Red Machine wrote:
That's your own jaded-ness or cynicism or being "tired of it" or whatever (which is totally fine because it's your opinion), but consider this: the next time they advertise Orton vs. Dragon or Orton vs. Cena, are you going to want to see it any more because of how good these matches were?
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Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
I cant be the only one who has a powerful hunch to Abyss's " man who knows him.", huh? Great way to really bring him back and freshen him up.
When they come, they'll come at what you love.
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Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
My assumption is that it is James Mitchell. Who do you think it will be?KILLdozer wrote:I cant be the only one who has a powerful hunch to Abyss's " man who knows him.", huh? Great way to really bring him back and freshen him up.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3
Re: BRM Reviews the 2/13/2014 Impact (horrid)
Yea, gotta be. I read two other slight theories of it being DR. Stevie, but thats not likely to me. The other was "Ray started this whole entire angle 2 years ago, what if he is off television after losing the casket match for the same period of time, and this whole darker side ends up tying it all together towards him , leading to the finish of that original feud ?" I really wouldnt wanna see it, and wouldnt, honestly. This Abyss thing has me half thinking of watching again, but ì dont think id watch that. But the more ì think about it, the more plausible it seems. I really dont think so though, doubt thats the current direction.
When they come, they'll come at what you love.
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