BRM Reviews the 10/24/2013 Impact

[Big Red Machine]

OPENING SEGMENT- Dixie gives a good insincere heel speech… but the crowd crap all over it by chating “we want Hogan!”
Dear Salt Lake City crowd; WHY THE F*CK DO YOU WANT HULK HOGAN RIGHT NOW! It is 2013, and he completely pissed on TNA on the way out. Why do you want him back?
I never thought I’d ever type this, but Dixie Carter’s promo was F*CKING FANTASTIC! It was like she was possessed by the spirit of heel Mickie James! Bully came out and he was great, as was AJ. Then Bully gets tons of heat on AJ with a vicious beatdown to weaken him for tonight’s title match. This segment was AWES…!
ANDERSON?! WHAT THE F*CK?! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Anderson can’t return now! He has to return during the main event to cost Bully the title match!

ANDERSON PROMO- I’m not quite sure what it is that Bully is doing that he claims that “the boys” and “the agents” are sick and tired of, but if they are all so sick and tired of it, wouldn’t they have tried to stop it? Or at least said something?
Dixie has Anderson arrested by security.

After this has happened, Tenay tells us that Anderson “is on a mission to end Aces & Eights and to end Bully Ray.” How do you, Mike? He hasn’t told us this yet! Are you a mind reader?! I absolutely hate it when an announcer passes of speculation as fact!

VELVET SKY & ODB vs. BROOKE TESSMACHER & GAIL KIM (w/Lei’D Tapa)- 2.5/10
Why would Brooke team with Gail? Shouldn’t this match be Gail & Tapa vs. ODB & Brooke (you know… the two women who get screwed out of the title against the two women who conspired to screw them out of the title). All we got to see in this match was Tapa interfering again. It’s time to move this forward and have her actually wrestle.

ETHAN CARTER III vs. DEWEY BARNES- another extended squash.
Why would you waste time at BFG debuting EC III in a squash if all he is going to after BFG is keep squashing jobbers?

STING & MAGNUS BACKSTAGE- if you were going to have them be buddies afterwards, why not just have Magnus shake Sting’s hand after the match at BFG and use this time for something productive?

KURT ANGLE & BOBBY ROODE SEGMENT- okay

ACES & EIGHTS BACKSTAGE- Bully Ray sends Garrett & Knux to the jail where Anderson is being held to ensure that he doesn’t post bail. How, exactly, are they going to do this? By breaking into a jail and beating him up?

DIXIE ON THE PHONE BACKSTAGE- Dixie needs something from someone. She also apparently has a servant-girl who is the only person in the company who is smart enough to CLOSE THE F*CKING DOOR when someone is trying to have a private conversation. Maybe they should make her the booker.

TAG TEAM TITLE SEGMENT- bad
The production department forgot to put the hyphen in Bro-Mans, so it came out looking as if Robbie and Jessie were the “BROMANS” like that was their last name or something, effectively killing the joke.
Anyway, this crap basically put me to sleep until Bad Influence came out and started a brawl. Then EY and Joseph Park came out and Daniels made Joseph bleed. This caused him to go all Abyss chokeslam Bro-Mans, then chase after Bad Influence.
To recap the segment:
1. We learned there will be a tag team title match next week (good)
2. We learned that the tag team title picture is basically exactly the same as it was before BFG, with basically everyone in the division in the title picture… so BFG didn’t mean anything
3. Joseph Park did the same thing he has been doing for a year and a half now. While he Abyssed out he beat up two guys who he could beat as lowly Joseph Park, then chased after the guys who he already beat up at BFG. NOTHING IS MOVING FORWARD IN THIS DIVISION!

NO COUNT-OUTS, NO DQ’S MATCH FOR THE TNA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH: AJ Styles(c) vs. Bully Ray (w/Brooke Tessmacher)- 6/10
Would you know it, they did the exact same finish that everyone knew they were going to do. AJ retains when Anderson comes back and distracts Bully, allowing AJ to pin him. I ask again, WHY would you spoil your surprise in the opening segment when you could reveal it in the main event? AJ’s win is tainted either way, so why not save the surprise for the main event?

AJ & DIXIE SEGMENT- Dixie offers AJ a contract. He tries to rip it up, but his wrestling gloves get in the way, so he wipes his ass with it instead. He then says that the people deserve a champion and therefore he is leaving the promotion and taking the title with him. HUH?

Overall, another bad Impact. Unless this new creative direction is ripping off the CM Punk angle, I have no idea what they are going for.

[cero2k]

OPENING SEGMENT- Dixie gives a good insincere heel speech… but the crowd crap all over it by chating “we want Hogan!”
Dear Salt Lake City crowd; WHY THE F*CK DO YOU WANT HULK HOGAN RIGHT NOW! It is 2013, and he completely pissed on TNA on the way out. Why do you want him back?
I never thought I’d ever type this, but Dixie Carter’s promo was F*CKING FANTASTIC! It was like she was possessed by the spirit of heel Mickie James! Bully came out and he was great, as was AJ. Then Bully gets tons of heat on AJ with a vicious beatdown to weaken him for tonight’s title match. This segment was AWES…!
ANDERSON?! WHAT THE F*CK?! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Anderson can’t return now! He has to return during the main event to cost Bully the title match!

this so much, i loved the segment, if you have a chance, re-watch this segment and pay attention to every single face and reaction Dixie does while AJ and Bully are shooting at eachother. She may be slowly getting the hand of this. I've also started thinking that it was a good move to make Dixie the heel authority now, since they can't seem to move away from having one, Dixie works because she's someone that generates real heel heat and so the fans react like TNA wants.

ETHAN CARTER III vs. DEWEY BARNES- another extended squash.
Why would you waste time at BFG debuting EC III in a squash if all he is going to after BFG is keep squashing jobbers?

they're hyping a debut they want to invest in. it makes sense. and being a Carter, EC3 obviously wants to debut on a PPV and he books himself in squash matches he knows he can win.

ACES & EIGHTS BACKSTAGE- Bully Ray sends Garrett & Knux to the jail where Anderson is being held to ensure that he doesn’t post bail. How, exactly, are they going to do this? By breaking into a jail and beating him up?

if they were a real MC, they would likely have a dirty cop on their payroll that would allow them have alone time in the cell with Anderson.

To recap the segment:
1. We learned there will be a tag team title match next week (good)
2. We learned that the tag team title picture is basically exactly the same as it was before BFG, with basically everyone in the division in the title picture… so BFG didn’t mean anything
3. Joseph Park did the same thing he has been doing for a year and a half now. While he Abyssed out he beat up two guys who he could beat as lowly Joseph Park, then chased after the guys who he already beat up at BFG. NOTHING IS MOVING FORWARD IN THIS DIVISION!

1. this, 2. it may be the same teams, but the titles changed, this removes the upper hand the super overpowered team of cowboy and viking had. 3. i personally don't care about this, but what really grinds my gears is that on sunday, because they bloodied Parks in the pre-show, we actually got the real Abyss, costume and all, EY even said that they had created a monster, these inconsistencies need to stop.

AJ & DIXIE SEGMENT- Dixie offers AJ a contract. He tries to rip it up, but his wrestling gloves get in the way, so he wipes his ass with it instead. He then says that the people deserve a champion and therefore he is leaving the promotion and taking the title with him. HUH?

worst thing is i don't really understand what AJ meant, is he leaving the company with the title?, is he coming back but not under contract?, did he just stole a car?

either way, if they're trying to go with the Summer of AJ here, i really hope when it comes to asking for changes in the company in order to resign AJ, they really do go for some of those changes, easy changes that AJ could ask that TNA could do without a problem. AJ could ask for more PPVs, more a 6 Sided Ring, stuff that TNA should do regardless. It'd be a nice touch.

[Big Red Machine]

OPENING SEGMENT- Dixie gives a good insincere heel speech… but the crowd crap all over it by chating “we want Hogan!”
Dear Salt Lake City crowd; WHY THE F*CK DO YOU WANT HULK HOGAN RIGHT NOW! It is 2013, and he completely pissed on TNA on the way out. Why do you want him back?
I never thought I’d ever type this, but Dixie Carter’s promo was F*CKING FANTASTIC! It was like she was possessed by the spirit of heel Mickie James! Bully came out and he was great, as was AJ. Then Bully gets tons of heat on AJ with a vicious beatdown to weaken him for tonight’s title match. This segment was AWES…!
ANDERSON?! WHAT THE F*CK?! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Anderson can’t return now! He has to return during the main event to cost Bully the title match!

this so much, i loved the segment, if you have a chance, re-watch this segment and pay attention to every single face and reaction Dixie does while AJ and Bully are shooting at eachother. She may be slowly getting the hand of this. I've also started thinking that it was a good move to make Dixie the heel authority now, since they can't seem to move away from having one, Dixie works because she's someone that generates real heel heat and so the fans react like TNA wants.

Absolutely! Compare the way she says "We're the Carters. People need us" to the way that EC III says it. He seems angry and forceful when he says it. When Dixie says it, she has this air of that she genuinely believes that she is being generous! With some experience not being a pathetic crying caricature of women, she could be big.

ACES & EIGHTS BACKSTAGE- Bully Ray sends Garrett & Knux to the jail where Anderson is being held to ensure that he doesn’t post bail. How, exactly, are they going to do this? By breaking into a jail and beating him up?

if they were a real MC, they would likely have a dirty cop on their payroll that would allow them have alone time in the cell with Anderson.

But they're not a real MC. They have been established as being WAY too pathetic to be a real MC, so that argument goes out the window... and do you really think that they have a dirty cop in every ward in every city in America?

AJ & DIXIE SEGMENT- Dixie offers AJ a contract. He tries to rip it up, but his wrestling gloves get in the way, so he wipes his ass with it instead. He then says that the people deserve a champion and therefore he is leaving the promotion and taking the title with him. HUH?

worst thing is i don't really understand what AJ meant, is he leaving the company with the title?, is he coming back but not under contract?, did he just stole a car?

either way, if they're trying to go with the Summer of AJ here, i really hope when it comes to asking for changes in the company in order to resign AJ, they really do go for some of those changes, easy changes that AJ could ask that TNA could do without a problem. AJ could ask for more PPVs, more a 6 Sided Ring, stuff that TNA should do regardless. It'd be a nice touch.

All of the reports I have read seem to say that they are ripping off the Punk angle, and that is also how I read it, especially with the ending shot of the show.
I love your idea to bring back the changes in question. One thing TNA has NEVER done (and it has been hurting their angles for years) is that they always tell but never show, and this is especially true in the whole Titles=power thing (hmmm... might write an article on that, because Sting/Magnus had a lot of trouble with that, too).

[Big Red Machine]

Oh! I forgot to mention, but the tag match was fantastic.

[cero2k]

Absolutely! Compare the way she says "We're the Carters. People need us" to the way that EC III says it. He seems angry and forceful when he says it. When Dixie says it, she has this air of that she genuinely believes that she is being generous! With some experience not being a pathetic crying caricature of women, she could be big.

definitely, with some good work the name The Carters could get established as a household name as much as The McMahons. a name that regardless of the era, will always have some sort of significance for TNA