BRM Reviews the 9/22/2011 Impact

[Big Red Machine]

OPENING SEGMENT- Mostly terrible. Hogan’s “medical clearance” excuse is good, but the rest of this segment was bad. Sting did extremely well with the crap he was given, but Hogan just sounded like a whiny nine year old the whole segment, dragging things down. I also really hated Bischoff getting punched out. All it was was a cheap pop, and a face getting his or her hands on a hated non-wrestler heel should never be cheap. Even worse, though, is that we have been told (and shown) multiple times that Eric Bischoff is a trained martial artist, and yet we are supposed to believe that one punch from Sting will not only knock him out, but cause him to oversell like The Rock taking a Stunner?

KAREN, TRACI, & KAZ- Kaz comes in to stand up for his wife while she is being unfairly berated by a heel. This would have been touching, if we didn’t know that just a few weeks ago, Traci was cheating on him with Bischoff.

QUEEN’S QUALIFIER MATCH: Miss Tessmacher vs. Mickie James- 3/10. Short, but it got over the stuff it needed to for whatever they are doing with Karen & Tessmacher.

MEXICAN AMERICA SEGMENT- um… okay…

TNA X-DIVISION TITLE MATCH: Austin Aries(c) vs. Jesse Sorensen- 4.25/10

INK INC ATTACK MEXICAN AMERICA- MORONIC! Anarquia, who has tons of tattoos… is afraid of needles? HE WAS THE ONE WHO WANTED TO GET THE TATTOO IN THE FIRST PLACE! Then, for no apparent reason, Ink Inc. attack them. WTF? Mexican America were minding their own business! And Ink Inc. just assaulted them! And why the hell did the cameraman follow Mexican America to the tattoo parlor? Seriously, why are we even seeing thi-WHOA!!!!!!! CHRISTINA VON EERIE! FINALLY! She has been under TNA contract for a whole damn year now! It’s about f*cking time that they used her! Anyway, this segment was dumb, but it definitely got CVE over well with that elbow to Anarquia’s face… wait… It’s not over? Jesse Neal comes back and… WHAT THE F*CK? THE BABYFACES ARE TORTURING SOMEONE! FOR NO REASON! As much as I want to cheer for CVE, Ink Inc are now heels in my book.

JEFF HARDY SEGMENTS (for the whole night)- very good to great.

SOMEONE JUMPED RVD- ooh. Some suspense.

KURT ANGE & BOBBY ROODE SEGMENT- How nice of them to wait for the four minute commercial that they didn’t even know about to be over before they started talking. It must have been boring as hell for the live fans, as they stood there silently. Other than that, this segment was good.

JERRY LYNN & BULLY RAY vs. MR. ANDERSON- 4.75. Jerry Lynn was great here, with his mocking of RVD.

AJ & DANIELS SEGMENT- good. Brawling in the sponsor’s offices. Now that is what I call clever product placement. I liked the fact that they stayed with this for a long time, as it made it feel much more significant than any old brawl.

KURT ANGLE vs. JAMES STORM- WTF? This match was awesome… and then it never ended! WTF? The bell never rang, no one was ever announced the winner… WTF? They just ended the show IN THE MIDDLE OF MATCH? “Wrestling Matters?” Bullsh*t.

Overall, this was a episode of Impact with an awesome main event that just left a bad taste in my mouth because of the way (or lack thereof) that it ended. In addition to that, we had babyfaces torturing people, and Kaz getting angry that someone called his wife a whore, completely ignoring the fact that she whored herself out a few weeks ago.

[cero2k]

KURT ANGE & BOBBY ROODE SEGMENT- How nice of them to wait for the four minute commercial that they didn’t even know about to be over before they started talking. It must have been boring as hell for the live fans, as they stood there silently. Other than that, this segment was good.

they were starting their feud a la Taker/trips by just staring at each other.

I'm gonna go ahead and call it for BfG
Kaz/Jarrett
Aj/Daniels
Tattoo team No 1/Tattoo team No 2
bubba ray/anderson
roode/angle
the queen thing final
and i guess Aries/Kendrick (maybe add Kash and Sorensen for the Ultimate X)

[Big Red Machine]

KURT ANGE & BOBBY ROODE SEGMENT- How nice of them to wait for the four minute commercial that they didn’t even know about to be over before they started talking. It must have been boring as hell for the live fans, as they stood there silently. Other than that, this segment was good.

they were starting their feud a la Taker/trips by just staring at each other.

I'm gonna go ahead and call it for BfG
Kaz/Jarrett
Aj/Daniels
Tattoo team No 1/Tattoo team No 2
bubba ray/anderson
roode/angle
the queen thing final
and i guess Aries/Kendrick (maybe add Kash and Sorensen for the Ultimate X)

All of this, but you forgot RVD vs. Jerry Lynn.

[cero2k]

True true true i forgot that one. Hogan sting too. Wow bfg seems packed as hell. And there still some feuds like gunner/storm that im not even considering. Morgan/joe/crimson too dang