BRM Reviews WWE Crown Jewel 2022

[Big Red Machine]

WWE Crown Jewel 2022 (11/5/2022)- Riyadh, Saudi Arabia

BROCK LESNAR vs. BOBBY LASHLEY- 4.75/10
Lashley shoved Brock into the steps to injure Brock’s knee. Then they copied and pasted the several minutes of spears, German Suplexes, and F-5s from every Brock vs. Roman match. Lashley then got the Hurt Lock, but Brock managed to kick off the ropes and pin Lashley. Lashley beat Brock up a bit after the match.
I was already sick and tired of Brock several years ago, and him beating Lashley here in this short match has not endeared him to me any more. This was a dream match for me- basically the only match I was interested in seeing Brock have at this point- and we got the six-minute special.
The announcers put as much focus as they could on Lashley’s “accomplishment” of proving that he could hang with Brock and framing Brock’s win as a fluke, to the point where it makes me wonder why they put Brock over in the first place. Is Brock refusing to do jobs?

BYRON SAXTON INTERVIEWS ALEXA BLISS & ASUKA- fine
Alexa was good. Asuka said her catchphrase. Some sort of stupid Bray Wyatt thing appeared behind Alexa was when she was talking, momentarily throwing her off. PLEASE don’t do this to her again.

WWE WOMEN’S TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: Alexa Bliss & Asuka vs. Damage CTRL (Dakota Kai & IYO SKY)- 6.75/10
I’m not a fan of this new music Alexa has. I want her old music back!
The action here was very good. Nikki Cross interfered, attacking Alexa, to cost Alexa and Asuka the titles.

BYRON SAXTON INTERVIEWS LOGAN PAUL- good… assuming Logan is supposed to be a heel, because he comes off like a total douchebag. One should not be counting on luck to win the world title.

STEEL CAGE MATCH: Drew McIntyre vs. Karrion Kross (w/Scarlett)- 6.75/10
Drew won, overcoming interference by Scarlett. Yes, in a cage match.

BYRON SAXTON IS IGNORED BY ROMAN REIGNS AND MOCKED BY PAUL HEYMAN- fine

AJ STYLES, LUKE GALLOWS, & KARL ANDERSON vs. JUDGEMENT DAY (w/Rhea Ripley)- 7/10
Action happened until Rhea interfered, allowing Judgment Day to win. In other words, nothing new has happened.

BRAUN STROWMAN vs. OMOS- 4.5/10
Omos dominated the entire match… and the Braun hit a powerslam and won. WTF?

WWE UNIFIED TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: The Usos(c) vs. the Brawling Brutes (Ridge Holland & Butch)- 7.5/10
Jey Uso apparently has a broken wrist. The crowd chanted “WE WANT SAMI!” Lots of great action here. The Usos won cleanly. They will defend against New Day on Friday, and if they win, they break New Day’s record for longest tag title reign.

LAST WOMAN STANDING MATCH FOR THE WWE RAW WOMEN’S TITLE: Bianca Belair(c) vs. Bayley- 7.5/10
There was some good action in here, but they got too silly for me, both with the golf cart, and with trying to trap each other with various things. If they had only done the spot with the equipment case, I would have been fine with it, because it came about naturally and the heel was the one doing it. Three of them, however, was too many, and both the one with the steps and the one on the finish looked ridiculous. I especially hated Bianca getting the win with one of these. To win a Last Woman Standing match, you’re supposed to incapacitate your opponent, not win on a semi-clever technicality.

BRAY WYATT PROMO- fine
He was addicted to the power of being The Fiend. An entity appeared on the screen and played a video whose purpose seemed to be to try to give someone a headache. It said that Bray would wind up going too far in the end, so why not just skip to the end and go too far right away.

WWE UNDISPUTED UNIVERSAL TITLE MATCH: Roman Reigns(c) (w/Paul Heyman) vs. Logan Paul (w/Jake Paul)- 7.5/10
So how upset do you think certain people got when a guy who looks a little bit like Adam Page hit a Buckshot Lariat and Roman Reigns kicked out?
They did a good job telling the story they had built up about Roman taking Paul lightly and Paul looking to win with “one lucky punch,” but they lost me when they started with all of the interference. Do we really need Jake Paul punching out both tag champs? And if both competitors are down on the outside for that long, it should at the very least be a count-out, if not just a ref stoppage because both guys are down.

This was a meh show from WWE. There was a lot of TV main event-level stuff, but nothing to write home about, and several of the matches were disappointing (particularly Brock vs. Lashley). Next up is Survivor Series. They’re not doing Raw vs. Smackdown, so I probably won’t skip it like I have in the past, but no promises.