ROH Conquest Tour: Milwaukee
ROH Conquest Tour: Milwaukee (3/13/2015)- Milwaukee, WI
RODERICK STRONG vs. ARIYA DAIVARI- 6/10
Kevin Kelly and Joe Dombrowski (always a fun combination) are on commentary tonight. Dombrowski told us that Ariya Daivari is looking to make sure that people know he isn’t a stereotypical Muslim of Middle Eastern descent in wrestling- that he is not some sort of evil terrorist. Unfortunately for him, I remember his more well-known older brother cutting a very similar promo his first night in ROH, tossing his keffiyeh into the crowd, shouting â€"I AM NOT A SHEIK! I AM NOT A TERRORIST!â€, and then proceeding to turn heel and wear the keffiyeh all the time. Then again, Ariya has actually done a great of job of giving himself some real personality that his brother never really seemed able to convey, so the odds of him getting typecast like that are significantly lower.
To accomplish this goal, Ariya has taken a route that is either idiotic or brilliant, and I’m not sure which. His gimmick is that he is the â€"Persian Party-boy,†who likes to hang out in nightclubs… so basically his plan to avoid being typecast as one stereotype is to fully embrace a different one.
He brought his â€"Persian carpet†out of the ring with him (and left it right in the corner, which really doesn’t seem safe). He had it so that he could hit his brother’s Magic Carpet Ride finisher. He also did a Camel Clutch, at which point he’s just asking for trouble, which Steve Corino, of course, gave him, calling what was basically an Argentine version of a Samoan Drop as an â€"Iranian Drop†which made me laugh out of sheer absurdity.
Daivari definitely held his own here, but he really struck me as someone who is better suited as a babyface than as a heel. On this night, though, that certainly wasn’t what the crowd wanted. What they wanted, as they made clear many times, was for Roddy to break young Ariya’s back- and Roddy certainly tried his best.
WILL FERRARA vs. SILAS YOUNG- 6.25/10
Big pop and lots of streamers for Silas, who is returning to ROH here in his home town for the first time in about seven months after breaking his leg. They told a good story with Ferrara always being able to avoid Silas’ Finlay Roll and Handstand into and Arabian Moonsault finish until Silas got frustrated and kicked Ferrara in the nuts, but got caught for the DQ. This would have worked a lot better if they weren’t in Milwaukee so Silas could have actually gotten a heel reaction from the crowd.
MARK BRISCOE vs. THE BEER CITY BRUISER- 4.5/10
Hopefully this will be the last match the Beer City Bruiser ever wrestles in ROH. Or in any other promotion I watch.
THE DECADE vs. ROPPONGI VICE (Rocky Romero & Barreta)- 7/10
Roppongi Vice’s music is HORRIBLE. Just SOOOO ANNOYING! It’d be fine without the vocals, most of which are someone repeating â€"Roppongi. Roppongi Vice.â€
The match was good, and surprisingly it was Whitmer who impressed me most of all. They did a standard babyface in peril story with Barreta as the babyface in peril, but they gave them a lot of time to go out there and do their thing. Roppongi Vice are exactly what they seem like, which is a hastily thrown-together Forever Hooligans 2.0.
POST-MATCH ANGLE- Jacobs wants follow the Code of Honor after the match, but Whitmer yells at him for doing so. They shove each other a big and Jacobs angrily walks off.
MATT TAVEN vs. CHEESEBURGER- 4.75/10
Taven cut a great heel promo before the match. The crowd LOVED Cheeseburger. The match was short, but very fun, and they did a great job with their twists and turns: every time you though that this HAD to be the start of Cheeseburger’s comeback, Taven would cut him off, and it just made you want Cheeseburger to win all the more.
MICHAEL ELGIN vs. JOSH ALEXANDER- 7.75/10
Two big, tough, strong motherf*ckers beating the sh*t out of each other and not wanting to be the one to finally go down. A Tomohiro Ishii match done right. Would have been an 8/10 if the finish didn’t feel so abrupt.
SAMOA JOE vs. ACH- 8.25/10
Matt Sydal dropped by to do guest commentary.
And just like that, Joe’s got it all back. That presence and charisma that have been missing for the last six years in TNA was all back the moment Joe stepped through that curtain. This was an awesome match. ACH’s ability to be extremely brash and cocky and still remain a babyface made him a perfect opponent for Joe here, as it let Joe prove that he’s still got it. Before this match, ACH thought he knew what it meant to face Samoa Joe. After this match, he KNOWS what it REALLY means to face Samoa Joe.
reDRagon vs. Jay Briscoe & Jay Lethal (w/the House of Truth)- 8/10
They did an awesome job telling their story, which was that Lethal and Briscoe didn’t get along. Of course, we all knew that this would be the story going in, so it felt like any little thing could set them off for good. The only thing I didn’t like was that Briscoe, the babyface was being more of a dick than the heel Lethal was.
An awesome show from ROH, and the main event (as well as the post-match shouting match) marks an important escalation in the â€"who is the better champion?†angle that they have been quietly building up since the beginning of the year.
STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Joe Dombrowski- â€"The ring has been cut off at its hypotenuse.â€
Not it hasn’t because the ring is not a triangle and thus doesn’t have a hypotenuse.
RODERICK STRONG vs. ARIYA DAIVARI- 6/10
Kevin Kelly and Joe Dombrowski (always a fun combination) are on commentary tonight. Dombrowski told us that Ariya Daivari is looking to make sure that people know he isn’t a stereotypical Muslim of Middle Eastern descent in wrestling- that he is not some sort of evil terrorist. Unfortunately for him, I remember his more well-known older brother cutting a very similar promo his first night in ROH, tossing his keffiyeh into the crowd, shouting â€"I AM NOT A SHEIK! I AM NOT A TERRORIST!â€, and then proceeding to turn heel and wear the keffiyeh all the time. Then again, Ariya has actually done a great of job of giving himself some real personality that his brother never really seemed able to convey, so the odds of him getting typecast like that are significantly lower.
To accomplish this goal, Ariya has taken a route that is either idiotic or brilliant, and I’m not sure which. His gimmick is that he is the â€"Persian Party-boy,†who likes to hang out in nightclubs… so basically his plan to avoid being typecast as one stereotype is to fully embrace a different one.
He brought his â€"Persian carpet†out of the ring with him (and left it right in the corner, which really doesn’t seem safe). He had it so that he could hit his brother’s Magic Carpet Ride finisher. He also did a Camel Clutch, at which point he’s just asking for trouble, which Steve Corino, of course, gave him, calling what was basically an Argentine version of a Samoan Drop as an â€"Iranian Drop†which made me laugh out of sheer absurdity.
Daivari definitely held his own here, but he really struck me as someone who is better suited as a babyface than as a heel. On this night, though, that certainly wasn’t what the crowd wanted. What they wanted, as they made clear many times, was for Roddy to break young Ariya’s back- and Roddy certainly tried his best.
WILL FERRARA vs. SILAS YOUNG- 6.25/10
Big pop and lots of streamers for Silas, who is returning to ROH here in his home town for the first time in about seven months after breaking his leg. They told a good story with Ferrara always being able to avoid Silas’ Finlay Roll and Handstand into and Arabian Moonsault finish until Silas got frustrated and kicked Ferrara in the nuts, but got caught for the DQ. This would have worked a lot better if they weren’t in Milwaukee so Silas could have actually gotten a heel reaction from the crowd.
MARK BRISCOE vs. THE BEER CITY BRUISER- 4.5/10
Hopefully this will be the last match the Beer City Bruiser ever wrestles in ROH. Or in any other promotion I watch.
THE DECADE vs. ROPPONGI VICE (Rocky Romero & Barreta)- 7/10
Roppongi Vice’s music is HORRIBLE. Just SOOOO ANNOYING! It’d be fine without the vocals, most of which are someone repeating â€"Roppongi. Roppongi Vice.â€
The match was good, and surprisingly it was Whitmer who impressed me most of all. They did a standard babyface in peril story with Barreta as the babyface in peril, but they gave them a lot of time to go out there and do their thing. Roppongi Vice are exactly what they seem like, which is a hastily thrown-together Forever Hooligans 2.0.
POST-MATCH ANGLE- Jacobs wants follow the Code of Honor after the match, but Whitmer yells at him for doing so. They shove each other a big and Jacobs angrily walks off.
MATT TAVEN vs. CHEESEBURGER- 4.75/10
Taven cut a great heel promo before the match. The crowd LOVED Cheeseburger. The match was short, but very fun, and they did a great job with their twists and turns: every time you though that this HAD to be the start of Cheeseburger’s comeback, Taven would cut him off, and it just made you want Cheeseburger to win all the more.
MICHAEL ELGIN vs. JOSH ALEXANDER- 7.75/10
Two big, tough, strong motherf*ckers beating the sh*t out of each other and not wanting to be the one to finally go down. A Tomohiro Ishii match done right. Would have been an 8/10 if the finish didn’t feel so abrupt.
SAMOA JOE vs. ACH- 8.25/10
Matt Sydal dropped by to do guest commentary.
And just like that, Joe’s got it all back. That presence and charisma that have been missing for the last six years in TNA was all back the moment Joe stepped through that curtain. This was an awesome match. ACH’s ability to be extremely brash and cocky and still remain a babyface made him a perfect opponent for Joe here, as it let Joe prove that he’s still got it. Before this match, ACH thought he knew what it meant to face Samoa Joe. After this match, he KNOWS what it REALLY means to face Samoa Joe.
reDRagon vs. Jay Briscoe & Jay Lethal (w/the House of Truth)- 8/10
They did an awesome job telling their story, which was that Lethal and Briscoe didn’t get along. Of course, we all knew that this would be the story going in, so it felt like any little thing could set them off for good. The only thing I didn’t like was that Briscoe, the babyface was being more of a dick than the heel Lethal was.
An awesome show from ROH, and the main event (as well as the post-match shouting match) marks an important escalation in the â€"who is the better champion?†angle that they have been quietly building up since the beginning of the year.
STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Joe Dombrowski- â€"The ring has been cut off at its hypotenuse.â€
Not it hasn’t because the ring is not a triangle and thus doesn’t have a hypotenuse.