Cero Reviews GCW Orange Cassidy Is Doing Something Or Whatever, Who Knows

[cero2k]

GCW Orange Cassidy Is Doing Something Or Whatever, Who Knows
April 6, 2019
Jersey City, NJ

Orange Cassidy came out to start the show. In the most Orange Cassidy way, he welcomed everyone to the show. He asked the fans for a ring announcer since he didn’t plan for one and found one by the name of Louden Noxious.

Swamp Monster Lumberjack Match
Allie Kat vs Kris Stadtlander vs Saraya Knight vs Shotzi Blackheart - 3/10
This was a fun match, but the wrestling wasn’t much. Saraya was the first eliminated when all women ganged up on her for being a dick. Second eliminated was Stadlander when Shotzi hit a 619 and a top rope Senton. Allie Kat at one point faked out a dive because she got scared, but later gathered the bravery thanks to the chants of the fans. Finish saw Kat win with the Pussy Piledriver. The stupid Swamp Monsters never did their job when the competitors went outside.

Best 7-out-of-13 Falls Match
Chris Brookes (w/Kid Lykos) vs Logan Easton Laroux - 5/10
It started with Brookes low blowing Laroux for the first fall by DQ. The second fall also went to Laroux when Lykos came in and low blowed him. The third fall saw Brookes lock in the Calamari Stretch for the submission. Brookes then started chopping Laroux. The next seven falls were all roll up reversals in the same spot ending 6-6 as we went into sudden death.

Sudden death had something close to a match, but it also had a lot of shenanigans when Lykos put a mask on Bryce to blind him. Finish was CCK going for the Sick F’n Tag Moves, but Laroux caught Lykos with a low blow as he was coming down. Laroux got rid of Lykos. Brookes rolled up Laroux for the pin, winning 7-6. This was fun given the stipulation and time given.

3rd Inaugural Jansport Invitational Scramble to win a $16 Gift Card at Friendly’s
Jigsaw vs Sonny Defarge vs Dan Champion vs Jake Atlas vs Tony Deppen vs Lucky 13 vs Air Wolf - 6.5/10
Last night, Deppen beat up a man with no legs, so today, he is really over as a heel. This was a great, fast paced, action packed match. It had the usual spots for a multi-man match with several pair ups, everyone diving, and the final 'Everyone hits their finish' sequence.

At the end, Champion and Defarge went to toss out Jigsaw into the crowd, but he countered, took out Champion, superkicked Defarge, hit the Jig'n'Tonic and finally picked up the win.

5 o'Clock Somewhere Last Person Standing Match
Session Moth Martina vs Nate "Spyder" Webb - 4/10
The stipulation is that every 30 seconds, the participants need to chug a beer. Webb chugged his first beer during his entrance. Webb, Noxious, and referee Bryce all danced in the ring to Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus. Session Moth has been chugging beers since Wednesday.

They started the match with a Frye/Takayama spot while they chugged beers in between. They ran the ropes, they did the chairs strike-off, they did dives, they did submissions and top rope spots, all while chugging beers every

Ending was Martina and Webb exchanging beer mists and colliding in the middle of the ring after stereo lariats. They fell with each other's arms on each other and Bryce called it a double pin draw to the chants of “AL-CO-HOL”. Kudos to them for pulling a match while chugging beer every 30 seconds.

NOVA dodgeball challenge
Team Blue (Faye Jackson, Jimmy Yuta, Terra Callaway, Arik Royal, & Red Eagle) defeated Team Red (Veda Scott, Shazza McKenzie, Jeff Cannonball, Daniel Makabe, & Sage Phillips) - 5/10
All picks led to jokes on MJF never getting picked. He took the balls at the end, setting up a wrestling match instead. Fans booed the idea and started chanting ‘Wrestling Sucks!” and “Dodgeball is Real!"

The match was short and it was a lot of pairing up, hitting dives, and at the end, all of Team Blue locked in submissions on Team Red for the submission win.

Teddy Hart’s Reading Rainbow - Teddy came out with Mr. Velvet and Caspian. He talked to the fans about going to jail and about what WrestleMania weekend means to the talent. He talked about fans supporting them even when they have dodgeball games and cats in the ring. He thanked the crowd. He put over GCW, the talent backstage, and especially Joey Janela. He talked about Orange Cassidy being one of the most unique wrestlers out there who he brought out to reconcile with Mr. Velvet.

Hart read a book called, "If I Was A Cat". Fans popped huge for each page he read, getting “Read Forever” chants. This was a really nice heartfelt segment.

Shinjiro Otani defeated Jonathan Gresham - 7/10
This was a great technical contest. Gresham worked over Otani’s left arm, manipulating the elbows, looking for flash pins in between. There was a great exchange were Gresham had the Kimura and wouldn’t release it even after Otani hit a scoop slam on him. Otani worked the head. They exchanged forearms with Gresham going for the left arm instead of the neck. Otani hit a Dragon Suplex for a near fall, followed with a spiral bomb to pick up the win. Too short, would had loved for more action like this.

Singles Match with a 60 Second Time Limit
Trent? vs Chuck Taylor - 1/10? 10/10?
It started with both men locking up in the center of the ring and then it ended. Fans asked for five more seconds. Trent then rolled up Taylor to win via pinfall in overtime. After the match, they hugged it out. This was great for the time it got.

Yuletide Deathmatch
Nick Gage w/Dewey Donovan vs Ultramantis Black - 6.5/10
If you've never seen Dewey Donovan, Nick Gage's manager, he is amazing. He moves like Paul Bearer, is annoying like Bill Alfonso, and his look is like a cheap car salesman. The ring was surrounded by barbed wire and Xmas decorations.

As with most Gage deathmathces, this felt chaotic at times and perfectly controlled at others. This was one of those where they're starting the match and they start bumping against the props. They did barbed wire boards, thumbtacks, and a barbed wire Xmas tree. At the end, Mantis started a comeback and went for an Angel’s Wings, but Gage reversed into a chokebreaker for the win. This was a good hardcore match that felt chaotic at points.

Post-match - MJF came out and nailed Gage with a chair. He cut a promo saying he was mad for not being picked in the dodgeball game and called out the fans for liking this show, saying this is not what wrestling is.

Cassidy came out to confront him, hitting the Orange Mist on him and set him up for Gage and Mantis who took him out on top of the tacks. Cassidy gave Gage and Mantis sunglasses to close out the show.

OVERALL THOUGHTS
This was a fun show to watch. Aside from the main event, it was all fun and games and the type of show that fans either love or hate.

[Big Red Machine]

Fans asked for five more seconds.

They read my post!