BRM Reviews the 6/22/2016 Lucha Underground
Posted: Jun 23rd, '16, 14:25
DARIO CUETO GIVES ONE OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS TO NIGHT CLAW- who is Night Claw, you ask? Well apparently he is a top up-and-coming Luchador who, like Prince Puma, traces his lineage back to the Jaguar Tribe. Also like Prince Puma, he gets those goody growling sound effects. His mask is that of a black panther, so like Prince Puma he has also chosen a different big cat to represent him even though he is part of the Jaguar Tribe.
Anyway, he’s a new guy on the roster and now he’s got a medallion. He speaks using a voice distorter. Before he leaves, Dario gives him a warning (or perhaps just some friendly advice): the Jaguar Tribe’s overconfidence left them vulnerable and they were the first to be destroyed by the gods.
Also, during this segment Dario mentioned that tonight we would see the other six ancient Aztec medallions earned in combat, so that’s the theme of our show. Striker tells us that in addition to that, Prince Puma come out to the ring to tell everyone what he wants to do at Ultima Lucha II
WINNER GETS ONE OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Daga vs. Mascarita Sagrada (w/Famous B & Brenda)- 2.5/10
The match was short, but did its job. Daga was being a douche on the finish, purposely turning Sagrada away from the referee so the ref wouldn’t see him tap out. Kobra Moon was watching from on top of Dario’s office, cheering for Daga.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- great.
Famous B turns on Mascarita Sagrada, superkicking him and beating him with his shoe. Brenda was very upset about this. This should make for a fun but short match for Ultima Lucha II.
DARIO MEETS WITH EL DRAGON AZTECA JR. IN HIS OFFICE- he lets it slip that Black Lotus was the one who killed El Dragon Azteca and tells him about his match with Black Lotus at Ultima Lucha II. From the way they shot this, it seemed to me that they are trying to make us think that Dario is in El Dragon Azteca Jr.’s head.
TRIOS MATCH FOR THREE OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Joey Ryan, Cortez Castro, & Mr. Cisqo vs. Kill Shot, Sinestro de la Muerte, & Marty “The Moth” Martinez- 5.5/10
Before the match Marty tried to make peace with Killshot, offering him his stolen dog tags back. I can only assume he will steal them again at the end of the match. They told their story teamwork among theoretically dysfunctional teams very well, with Joey running it in the end for his guys. Marty did, indeed, steal the dog tags back after the match.
Striker is talking about Sexy Star’s “backstory” of having been a victim of domestic abuse. When have they ever mentioned this before? It feels like they keep changing her backstory every time to be more and more dramatic but as a result of the fact that it has changed every time to make her appear to be more of a victim, it feels like cheap overdrama instead of a real backstory.
TAG TEAM MATCH FOR TWO OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Sexy Star & Mariposa vs. Ivelisse & Taya- 6/10
A very underwhelming reappearance for Mariposa after her feud with Sexy Star ended. She doesn’t feel at all like she is her own character. She just feels like she is Sexy Star’s bogeywoman, but she is a previously-vanquished bogeywoman so she’s not even scary anymore.
I didn’t like doing parejas increibles for two matches in a row on the same show with the same prize. I get why they did it (to build up heat between Ivelisse and Taya heading into Ultima Lucha II while giving all of the medallions out in as few matches as possible to save time), but I don’t like it. Striker tried to sell that this match would be different by saying that on average, women are more mature and less ego-driven than men. Whether that is true or not is a moot point because THIS IS PRO WRESTLING. Case in point: Sexy Star… a woman who calls herself “Sexy Star” and multiple times in her life has no-showed matches and quit promotions instead of dropping a title in the ring. Also, isn’t ego basically the entire basis of Taya and Mundo’s characters?
Striker said the following: “The Ice Queen melting among the chairs here at The Temple. Now The Butterfly will fly.” A few sentences later he went out of his way to mention Mikhail Baryshnikov (the famous Soviet ballet choreographer). Matt Striker needs something like the “Stupid Helmet” from That 70’s Show, but instead of letting him put it on before hitting him, someone should just whack him in the head with the helmet.
PRINCE PUMA PROMO- he started by talking WAY too fast. He wants to wrestle Rey Mysterio Jr. at Ultima Lucha II. Rey came out and cut a good promo accepting his challenge.
This show really felt like a rush towards Ultima Lucha II, although they did a good job of trying to disguise it via the medallions matches. It certainly accomplished everything it set out to do and accomplished it well, but in and of itself it wasn’t really an enjoyable show.
Anyway, he’s a new guy on the roster and now he’s got a medallion. He speaks using a voice distorter. Before he leaves, Dario gives him a warning (or perhaps just some friendly advice): the Jaguar Tribe’s overconfidence left them vulnerable and they were the first to be destroyed by the gods.
Also, during this segment Dario mentioned that tonight we would see the other six ancient Aztec medallions earned in combat, so that’s the theme of our show. Striker tells us that in addition to that, Prince Puma come out to the ring to tell everyone what he wants to do at Ultima Lucha II
WINNER GETS ONE OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Daga vs. Mascarita Sagrada (w/Famous B & Brenda)- 2.5/10
The match was short, but did its job. Daga was being a douche on the finish, purposely turning Sagrada away from the referee so the ref wouldn’t see him tap out. Kobra Moon was watching from on top of Dario’s office, cheering for Daga.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- great.
Famous B turns on Mascarita Sagrada, superkicking him and beating him with his shoe. Brenda was very upset about this. This should make for a fun but short match for Ultima Lucha II.
DARIO MEETS WITH EL DRAGON AZTECA JR. IN HIS OFFICE- he lets it slip that Black Lotus was the one who killed El Dragon Azteca and tells him about his match with Black Lotus at Ultima Lucha II. From the way they shot this, it seemed to me that they are trying to make us think that Dario is in El Dragon Azteca Jr.’s head.
TRIOS MATCH FOR THREE OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Joey Ryan, Cortez Castro, & Mr. Cisqo vs. Kill Shot, Sinestro de la Muerte, & Marty “The Moth” Martinez- 5.5/10
Before the match Marty tried to make peace with Killshot, offering him his stolen dog tags back. I can only assume he will steal them again at the end of the match. They told their story teamwork among theoretically dysfunctional teams very well, with Joey running it in the end for his guys. Marty did, indeed, steal the dog tags back after the match.
Striker is talking about Sexy Star’s “backstory” of having been a victim of domestic abuse. When have they ever mentioned this before? It feels like they keep changing her backstory every time to be more and more dramatic but as a result of the fact that it has changed every time to make her appear to be more of a victim, it feels like cheap overdrama instead of a real backstory.
TAG TEAM MATCH FOR TWO OF THE SEVEN ANCIENT AZTEC MEDALLIONS: Sexy Star & Mariposa vs. Ivelisse & Taya- 6/10
A very underwhelming reappearance for Mariposa after her feud with Sexy Star ended. She doesn’t feel at all like she is her own character. She just feels like she is Sexy Star’s bogeywoman, but she is a previously-vanquished bogeywoman so she’s not even scary anymore.
I didn’t like doing parejas increibles for two matches in a row on the same show with the same prize. I get why they did it (to build up heat between Ivelisse and Taya heading into Ultima Lucha II while giving all of the medallions out in as few matches as possible to save time), but I don’t like it. Striker tried to sell that this match would be different by saying that on average, women are more mature and less ego-driven than men. Whether that is true or not is a moot point because THIS IS PRO WRESTLING. Case in point: Sexy Star… a woman who calls herself “Sexy Star” and multiple times in her life has no-showed matches and quit promotions instead of dropping a title in the ring. Also, isn’t ego basically the entire basis of Taya and Mundo’s characters?
Striker said the following: “The Ice Queen melting among the chairs here at The Temple. Now The Butterfly will fly.” A few sentences later he went out of his way to mention Mikhail Baryshnikov (the famous Soviet ballet choreographer). Matt Striker needs something like the “Stupid Helmet” from That 70’s Show, but instead of letting him put it on before hitting him, someone should just whack him in the head with the helmet.
PRINCE PUMA PROMO- he started by talking WAY too fast. He wants to wrestle Rey Mysterio Jr. at Ultima Lucha II. Rey came out and cut a good promo accepting his challenge.
This show really felt like a rush towards Ultima Lucha II, although they did a good job of trying to disguise it via the medallions matches. It certainly accomplished everything it set out to do and accomplished it well, but in and of itself it wasn’t really an enjoyable show.