BRM Reviews the 9/3/2012 Raw

[Big Red Machine]

PUNK & LAWLER BRAWL- So Punk jumped Lawler (that’s what Cole said) and only got the advantage when refs were holding Lawler back (Punk later said that Lawler was the one who jumped him, which would make this okay).

OPENING SEGMENT- ABSOLUTELY AWESOME… except for one thing. Punk’s comment that “if you disagree with me, that means you are disrespecting me” is just too far for me. I know that it actually fits in a bit with Punk’s character since his heel turn back in 2009, but it is just such a ridiculous assertion to make. Actually saying that (which is just so incredibly fascist) is just too quick a transition from where Punk was just a few months ago. It is like Bobby Roode just waking up and deciding that all of his friendships mean nothing to him or like Dragon just randomly telling AJ to shut up out of nowhere. This is something that needs to develop slowly, but instead, WWE has decided to just flip the magic switch in Punk’s head from “good” to “evil.”

RANDY ORTON vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/Vickie Guerrero)- 6.5/10

Cole says that Dragon & Kane’s anger management courses “might be the most talked-about thing in the whole WWE right now.” If that is anywhere close to being true, that is a problem.

ANGER MANAGEMENT SKIT #1- sh*t.

REY MYSTERIO & SIN CARA vs. CODY RHODES & TENSAI (w/Sakamoto)- 4.25/10
Dammit. Cody loses again! They are killing all of his credibility!

ANGER MANAGEMENT SKIT #2- If Kane & Dragon come out of this as a tag team, I will throw something heavy.

WHAT THE F*CK! THE CHAMPION VS. CHAMPION MATCH TAKES A BACKSEAT TO THE MATCH BETWEEN THE #1 CONTENDERS? WHAT THE F*CK!
If this sh*t keeps up, I am going to need anger management.

CM PUNK vs. SHEAMUS- maybe I spoke too soon. At least Punk addressed my above comments and also got pissed off about it, but I still think it makes WWE look silly (from a kayfabe point of view) to not have Champion vs. Champion (in one champion’s home town, to boot!) as the main event. I will also give them credit for finding just about the only way Punk could stay decently in character and get booed in Chicago (I have no doubt that he wil show up at the end of the show and attack someone, though). I also liked the fact that there was an explanation for why Punk was allowed to leave early, but I still just didn’t like the segment. It was good, but I didn’t like it.
I also hated AJ not knowing who Matt Striker was and Punk doesn’t strike me as the type of guy to have a personal driver. He seems a lot more like the drive himself around type.

SHEAMUS vs. JACK SWAGGER- DUD!
I popped for Sheamus using a random submission… but then SWAGGER TAPPED TO IT! Jack Swagger can’t last more than three minutes without giving up? WTF?! This guys is a former WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! He was the United States Champion just six months ago! And now he can’t last three minutes!

AFTERMATH- Once again, WWE made Del Rio look like chump with no chance of beating Sheamus. I just do not understand this booking. First Sheamus beats Del Rio cleanly at Money In The Bank. Then Del Rio earns another title shot and loses that one because of questionable tactics by Sheamus and a refereeing mistake. Then Del Rio earns another title shot… but rather than doing things that might continue to make us question whether Del Rio might be able to win the title this time, they just make him constantly look like a chump. What gives?

EVE TORRES vs. KAITLYN- I can’t rate this match because I barely got to see any of it because the camera spent too much damn time on Miz and Layla arguing. I do like the booking here, though. Kaitlyn has been booked extremely weekly, so having Eve win cleanly here gives her a legitimate claim to a title shot at some point in the future.
Dear G-d! How many times do they have to show us Kaitlyn wining that damn battle royale? I’m pretty sure they’ve shown it on every damn show since it happened!
During this match, Layla joined Cole and Miz on commentary… and she was ATROCIOUS! She first criticizes Eve for using her looks to manipulate men, then retorts to one of Miz’s comments by saying “I was in Maxim!” Not hypocritical, but pretty close. Her comments on Eve not really turning over a new leaf were just poorly backed up. Her basic argument can be summed up as “based on what we’ve seen, Eve seems to have turned over a new leaf, but what about the things that we haven’t seen?” Sorry Layla, but all we can judge people on is what we have seen. Unless you have heard about her doing something that would contradict her new friendliness, we have no reason believe that she isn’t sincere. If we judge people by what they may or may not be doing when where not looking and you don’t have any proof, we end up arguments like “well sure, based on what we have seen JR seems like he isn’t an axe murderer, but what about the things we haven’t seen?”
She says that Kaitlyn won NXT two years ago, and then, in the next sentence (and multiple times later on, calls Kaitlyn a “rookie.” I face-palmed.
Miz claims to be a highly decorated champion in WWE, and Layla replies “oh yeah? In whose eyes?” Well Miz is a three-time former tag team champion, a two-time former US Champion, a former WWE Champion, and the current Intercontinental Champion… so I’d say in most people’s eyes.

JACK SWAGGER & AJ BACKSTAGE- good segment.

ANGER MANAGEMENT SKIT #3- dumb, but at least it felt like it was building to something.

OTUNGA IS WORKING WITH DEL RIO- could be good.

RYBACK vs. JINDER MAHAL- squash

DRAGON & KANE HUG IT OUT IN THE RING- I will personally hunt down every last person who voted for this option, abduct them, gag them, tie them to a chair and lock them all in a room together where they will be forced to watch this dull, obnoxious, moronic waste of time for the rest of their lives.
By the time this was done, I didn’t even give a damn about two of my all-time favorites fighting (and it was pretty good, too). That is now much I hated this.

WWE UNITED STATES TITLE MATCH: Antonio Cesaro(c) (w/Aksana) vs. Santino Marella- no rating. Decent segment.
Didn’t Santino just get a rematch last week? Why is he getting another title shot?
Anyway, they did advance the story a bit, as this week, Santino was hesitant to use the cobra, but these matches still feel too similar. Some more length would help them.

ZACK RYDER vs. HEATH SALTER- 0.75/10
Two minute match.
WHOA! Was it just me, or was the Miz playing the babyface commentator in this match?

AJ & VICKIE SEGMENT- dragged on a bit too long, but I liked where it ended up… until AJ broke down crying. They should had people come out to calm her down after she through the chair.


FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH: Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena- 7/10
I saw Punk’s return coming… but not Heyman.

Commentary tonight was handled by Michael Cole and The Miz, and they were absolutely awesome. Miz has a bright career as a color commentator ahead of him when he retires from in-ring action. It is also a testament to how great Michael Cole has been that he was so easily able to slip into the babyface role and yet it still felt like the same Michael Cole who has been calling Raw as a heel for the past two years.

Overall, not a good episode of Raw, but with a surprise at the end that will definitely have everybody talking.

[kiel297]

I loved everything to do with the anger management skits, loved the hug it out segment, VOTED for the hug it out segment, and eventually hope Kane and Bryan team at the end of this.

I also thought this was a great RAW.

Downvotes to the... oh wait we don't have those here.

[Big Red Machine]

I loved everything to do with the anger management skits, loved the hug it out segment, VOTED for the hug it out segment, and eventually hope Kane and Bryan team at the end of this.

Well, now I know who to come after first.

[kiel297]

I loved everything to do with the anger management skits, loved the hug it out segment, VOTED for the hug it out segment, and eventually hope Kane and Bryan team at the end of this.

Well, now I know who to come after first.

Excuse me for not taking my wrestling too seriously ;D

[Serujuunin]

I thought the hugging it out part was the funniest thing I've seen like, ever. I was laughing my a** off the whole time.

I like the anger management stuff.

[cero2k]

WHAT THE F*CK! THE CHAMPION VS. CHAMPION MATCH TAKES A BACKSEAT TO THE MATCH BETWEEN THE #1 CONTENDERS? WHAT THE F*CK!
If this sh*t keeps up, I am going to need anger management.

CM PUNK vs. SHEAMUS- maybe I spoke too soon. At least Punk addressed my above comments and also got pissed off about it, but I still think it makes WWE look silly (from a kayfabe point of view) to not have Champion vs. Champion (in one champion’s home town, to boot!) as the main event. I will also give them credit for finding just about the only way Punk could stay decently in character and get booed in Chicago (I have no doubt that he wil show up at the end of the show and attack someone, though). I also liked the fact that there was an explanation for why Punk was allowed to leave early, but I still just didn’t like the segment. It was good, but I didn’t like it.

I think they missed big on this segment. I was hoping that Punk, being more intelligent than what he's been looking, would try to talk sense into Sheamus and sell him the idea that this being a champ vs champ match, it should be the main event, that Sheamus should be demanding respect too, Sheamus may be the seconds best at most, but still deserves the respect of a world champ, etc etc. Sheamus would come back with a "i don't care, i'm here to fight"

EVE TORRES vs. KAITLYN- I can’t rate this match because I barely got to see any of it because the camera spent too much damn time on Miz and Layla arguing. I do like the booking here, though. Kaitlyn has been booked extremely weekly, so having Eve win cleanly here gives her a legitimate claim to a title shot at some point in the future.
Dear G-d! How many times do they have to show us Kaitlyn wining that damn battle royale? I’m pretty sure they’ve shown it on every damn show since it happened!

i read from some sources that Kaitlyn's win was actually a botch, that Eve missed her landing when she was pushed out of the ring.

DRAGON & KANE HUG IT OUT IN THE RING- I will personally hunt down every last person who voted for this option, abduct them, gag them, tie them to a chair and lock them all in a room together where they will be forced to watch this dull, obnoxious, moronic waste of time for the rest of their lives.
By the time this was done, I didn’t even give a damn about two of my all-time favorites fighting (and it was pretty good, too). That is now much I hated this.

i actually liked this, I was really expecting the tag match, and a match between the two would have been the same shit, different day. Hug in it out was an interesting thing, it's obvious these two are in a comedy run and they still delivered some good strong fighting. Dragon's hometown nickname is Mr Hug It Out

WWE UNITED STATES TITLE MATCH: Antonio Cesaro(c) (w/Aksana) vs. Santino Marella- no rating. Decent segment.
Didn’t Santino just get a rematch last week? Why is he getting another title shot?
Anyway, they did advance the story a bit, as this week, Santino was hesitant to use the cobra, but these matches still feel too similar. Some more length would help them.

i was really hoping that the day Cesaro killed the cobra, he would do it like Earthquake killed Jake Roberts' snake. just for the reference.

AJ & VICKIE SEGMENT- dragged on a bit too long, but I liked where it ended up… until AJ broke down crying. They should had people come out to calm her down after she through the chair.

I thought this was stupid. So my boss can't hit me, but i can hit him?? and why didn't AJ simply book Vickie vs Beth or Vickie vs Show as a punishment for hitting her?? I love that they're breaking AJ down with people leaving and stuff, but this was just moronic, hasn't AJ's whole thing been to make matches out of nowhere like Lawler loves so much?

[kiel297]

No Cero, why didn't AJ just FIRE HER ASS

[cero2k]

No Cero, why didn't AJ just FIRE HER a**

exactly!!

[Big Red Machine]

AJ & VICKIE SEGMENT- dragged on a bit too long, but I liked where it ended up… until AJ broke down crying. They should had people come out to calm her down after she through the chair.

I thought this was stupid. So my boss can't hit me, but i can hit him?? and why didn't AJ simply book Vickie vs Beth or Vickie vs Show as a punishment for hitting her?? I love that they're breaking AJ down with people leaving and stuff, but this was just moronic, hasn't AJ's whole thing been to make matches out of nowhere like Lawler loves so much?

AJ's whole thing has been that if she hears someone use the words "crazy" or "unbalanced" or the like around her, she assumes they are talking about her and she puts them in a punishment match. This situation was different, and her response was to break down. I'm sure we will get Vickie vs. Beth or Nattie as a punishment match next week.

[Serujuunin]

AJ & VICKIE SEGMENT- dragged on a bit too long, but I liked where it ended up… until AJ broke down crying. They should had people come out to calm her down after she through the chair.

I thought this was stupid. So my boss can't hit me, but i can hit him?? and why didn't AJ simply book Vickie vs Beth or Vickie vs Show as a punishment for hitting her?? I love that they're breaking AJ down with people leaving and stuff, but this was just moronic, hasn't AJ's whole thing been to make matches out of nowhere like Lawler loves so much?

AJ's whole thing has been that if she hears someone use the words "crazy" or "unbalanced" or the like around her, she assumes they are talking about her and she puts them in a punishment match. This situation was different, and her response was to break down. I'm sure we will get Vickie vs. Beth or Nattie as a punishment match next week.

Either that or she'll be totally broken and she won't do anything at all... I want her to resign as GM and go back to wrestling.