NWK reviews King of the Ring 93

[NWK]

1. We get a rundown of the The King of the Ring brackets, and advertisements for Shawn Michaels vs. Crush and Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna.

2. The broadcast team is Jim Ross, Bobby Heenan, and Randy Savage, which I have long maintained is the best commentary team ever to be assembled.

3. Our first match is Bret Hart vs. Razor Ramon. We learn how much of a biased assclown Savage is, as apparently he's been prompting fans to chant "1-2-3" to piss off Razor.

4. Razor Ramon vs. Bret Hart is a solid match, with Bret Hart winning after reversing a Super Backdrop into a crossbody/splash pin. 7/10

5. Before the next match we get a package of Mr.Hughes, Harvey Whippleman, and Giant Gonzales laying out both Undertaker and Paul Bearer and stealing the urn.

6. Our next match is Mr.Perfect vs. Mr.Hughes w/ Harvey Whippleman. I had to rewatch this match twice, because the first time I watched I spent the entire time making fun of Mr.Hughes' ring name. Mr Hughes, is without a doubt, the absolute worst wrestler I've ever seen in the ring since The Wall. Mr.Perfect can't get him down, and the only way he can get any solid offense is by choking Mr.Hughes with his TIE! Unless your initials are I.R.S, you should be prohibited from wearing a tie during a match.

7. Apparently Mr. Hughes and Harvey Whippleman are the two biggest idiots in the WWF at the time, because Harvey....

A. Gives Mr.Hughes the Undertaker's stolen urn to use as a weapon

B. Mr.Hughes uses said urn to beat Mr.Perfect over the head, causing the DQ. Do they not know that the winner of the King of the Ring is like, really important and stuff? The match gets 3/10.

8. Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Bam Bam Bigelow did a good job of making up for the last match. THAT my friends is how you book big men. Not only did it make Hacksaw look brave, fighting through an injury for most of the match, but it also made Bam Bam look good by putting down a beloved babyface. The art of working over a body part from beginning to the end of a match is a lost art, but done perfectly here, as Bam Bam finishes the match with a diving headbutt to Duggan's ribs, which he's worked over since the opening bell.

9. Tatanka vs. Lex Luger gets off to a slow start, as there's this whole debacle about whether or not Luger should wear an elbow pad over the match. I will say though, Bobby Heenan's drawings in the "Brain Scan" segment, in which he tried to illustrate Luger had a monkey wrench in his arm, was made even more hilarious by the fact that Luger turned around at one point, forcing Heenan to go "No wait, the other arm"

10. Tatanka turning Luger's beloved mirror over on him was classic.

11. Wow...who knew that Tatanka and Lex could wrestle a full match, even if the time limit only was 15 minutes.

12. We get pretty general promos from both Hulk Hogan and Yokozuna at separate points in the PPV, Hogan's was pretty generic, but Mr.Fuji makes Yoko's promo unintentionally hilarious with his overdone Asian accent.

13. The match going to a draw was brilliant, as it kept both Luger and Tatanka undefeated but the sad part is this ending would be abused in many King of the Ring's to come when WWE Booking was just too lazy to book a semi-final.

14. The pre-match interview between Bret Hart and Mr.Perfect turned out to be unintentionally funny, as it turned into a "My dad could beat up your dad" type of argument.

15. Bret Hart def Mr.Perfect in a classic match 8.5/10

16. I swear to God, no matter how shitty of a wrestler Hulk Hogan is, honest to God, I ALWAYS mark out for him, he always brings this main event atmosphere to wherever he's wrestling. He does it here again with Yokozuna, despite the fact that Yokozuna can't work worth a crap. This was a solid match given the wrestlers involved. The finish (a cameraman interference) was something that I'd never seen before. 4.5/10

17. 8-Man Tag Match (Money Inc and The Head Shrinkers w/Afa vs. The Smoking Guns and Stiener Bros). This match had no real purpose and filled all of 3 minutes, 2/10

18. HBK vs. Crush was a decent match. The Doink interference was well done. My only disappointment was that we were robbed of a Sweet Chin Music 6.5 out of 10

19. Bam Bam Bigelow versus Bret Hart was fantastci, Bret overcoming fatigue for the entire match, while surviving punishment from Bam Bam. The multiple restarts left fans on the edge of their seats. The very end of the PPV (the coronation) succeeded in setting up a Jerry Lawler/Bret Hart feud 8.5/10