BRM Reviews the 4/22/2022 Rampage

[Big Red Machine]

OWEN HART FOUNDATION MEN’S TOURNAMENT QUALIFIER: Adam Cole vs. Tomohiro Ishii (w/Orange Cassidy & Rocky Romero)- 5.75/10
A good sign that you’ve tried to fit too much into a show if someone hits the “forward thirty seconds button” on the remote at the beginning of the theme song and finds that they have missed the opening bell for the first match.
They both got their spots in, including Ishii’s random no-selling. It’s so stupid. How the hell do you start a sequence no-selling the other guy’s finisher and then just trade a few strikes and end it in a double-down? It doesn’t do anything for the story. In fact, it undermines the story when the story is both guys working the head, and you’re no-selling your opponent’s finisher that is a strike to the head. It’s just no-selling to get a pop.
Jay White came out to attack Rocky Romero from behind. Orange Cassidy made no move to chase after White to get any sort of revenge. Some friend and stable-mate he is. White’s presence distracted the referee, allowing Cole to hit Ishii with a low blow to get the win, because G-d forbid Adam Cole should beat Tomohiro Ishii cleanly. Unworthy Adam Cole gets the “big win” to advance in this “high-stakes” tournament, which is so “high-stakes” because the winner gets… um…

EARLIER TODAY, THE JERICHO APPRECIATION SOCIETY ARE EJECTED FROM THE BUILDING- terrible
This was just Jericho and his group being clowns. And you’ve got to love how management is so proactive about making sure no one interferes in this match with nothing on the line, but didn’t take any steps to prevent interference all of those times that Britt Baker’s crew or Dan Lambert and Ethan Page or The Elite screwed someone out of a title match.

LEXI’S INTERVIEW WITH HOOK IS ONCE AGAIN INTERRUPTED BY DANHAUSEN- idiotic
Danhausen has spilled potato chips all over the floor, so Hook shoves him against a cinderblock wall… but not hard, which was highly disappointing. Anyway, spilling potato chips on the floor is what finally prompts hook to speak, telling Danhausen that Danhausen now has his attention.
Excalibur noted that we “rarely hear Hook speak,” which makes me wonder why the hell they keep trying to interview him every week.

SERPENTICO vs. LANCE ARCHER (w/Jake “The Snake” Roberts)- squash
Serpentico dove onto Archer and started celebrating as if he had wiped him out when he didn’t, because we apparently needed some comedy in this match. Archer won quickly with the blackout. After the match he chokeslammed Serpentico unnecessarily, like Wardlow does with the powerbombs. And, of course, instead of booing this unnecessary assault, the crowd went wild for it, just like they do when Wardlow does it. Knowing that he’s the heel and he’s not supposed to be getting cheered, Archer then teased doing a third one, but then didn’t, which is a fine way to get booed, but really makes no kayfabe sense.
The were was also a big-picture/meta issue that really bugged me here. I really didn’t like that Archer off TV for a while and then was only booked on TV again AFTER a match with him that the promotion wants to promote has been signed (and a similar thing happened with Nyla Rose before her title shot against Thunder Rosa).
I know. I know. I’m getting upset a wrestling promotion for promoting something. The issue, to me, is that it’s not supposed to be so damn transparent. If Archer is destroying people on TV for three weeks before the Wardlow match is announced, then when you do the angle for the Wardlow match, the feeling is “OOOOH! A clash of the titans!” and you can just go right to the match without any further build-up. Doing it this way, with the angle and agreement to a match happening first and this mismatch only being announced afterwards but being booked to happen before the Wardlow vs. Archer match, it feels much more transparent that the purpose of this match is to make Archer look impressive going into the Wardlow match… or, in kayfabe terms, it feels like Tony Khan is sending Serpentico out there to get murdered so that he can hopefully sell more tickets and draw a better rating for Archer vs. Wardlow.
Even if you had some sort of crazy constraints of TV time and couldn’t possibly get Archer into a match before now, they could have fixed this by just having Jake cut a promo saying that Archer had an open contract for tonight and dared anyone to come out and experience the devastation that would be visited upon Wardlow. Surely that would have been a more effective use of time on this show than having Tony Schiavone host a backstage talking segment with Toni Storm and Jaymie Hayter for the twelfth time.

TONY NESE VIDEO PACKAGE- good

LAX AND THE JERICHO APPRECIATION SOCIETY ARE BARRED FROM THE BUILDING: Eddie Kingston vs. Daniel Garcia- 7.25/10
Kingston is rocking a Sara Del Rey t-shir for some reason. Garcia worked the ribs, Kingston worked the head. Kingston won clean.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- decent
Kingston told Jericho that after he will whip him with his belt. It’s been thirteen years, and Taz still doesn’t know what the term “sacrificial lamb” means. And wasn’t Taz one of the people backstage at ECW who was so upset about the crucifixion angle?

TONY SCHIAVONE INTERVIEWS KEITH LEE & SHANE STRICKLAND- great
They cut a great promo on Team Taz, and then Ricky Starks responded from his head-set at the commentary table.

TONY SCHIAVONE INTERVIEWS JAMIE HAYTER, BRITT BAKER, & TONI STORM- bad
Nothing useful was said.

FTR VS. FTR VIDEO PACKAGE- fine
Well… at least we’ve had one person tell us why winning this tournament is so important to him. Unfortunately, that person was Dax, whose reason was so generic as to be pointless (he wants to win it for his daughters).

MARK HENRY INTERVIEWS THE PEOPLE IN THE MAIN EVENT- meh
Jade and Sterling were decent. Shafir had one line, which was bad.

AEW TBS TITLE MATCH: Jade Cargill(c) (w/Mark Sterling) vs. Marina Shafir- 6.5/10
The match was good at times, but also had some rough points. Jade needs to learn to sell better. Red Velvet and Kiera Hogan reached over the guardrail and punched Marina, and Sterling later got involved as well. Shafir was supposed to be a babyface? Well… they had me fooled. Jade retained, but the interference means that we should get a rematch, which I’m not eager to see at all.


A decent episode of Rampage.