BRM Reviews the 8/25/2021 Dynamite (good until the main event)

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews the 8/25/2021 Dynamite (good until the main event)

Post by Big Red Machine » Aug 26th, '21, 14:34

MATT HARDY vs. ORANGE CASSIDY- 6/10
We start off with dumb clown sh*t. Then Orange Cassidy stole money from Matt Hardy. He attacked the guy and put his money in this pocket. We just saw the Dirty Dawgs do this on Smackdown last month. It doesn’t become less wrong because you like the person doing it. Eventually they started to have a real wrestling match, which was decent. Matt worked over OC’s back while OC targeted the head and neck a bit. They also did a thing where OC used Matt’s moves. Matt must have broken his nose or something from the way he was bleeding. Also, much props on the clever finish, where they actually found a way for the hands in the pockets to be a beneficial thing do to during a wrestling match.
I would have liked more of an explanation for why Matt, who has been so reliant on outside help, left his crew in the back.

MALAKAI BLACK PROMO- good, other than the fact that he said “idiocrasy” when he meant “idiocy.” (Unless he meant that Brock Anderson was somehow committing himself to Cody by standing up for his dad, which I guess makes some sense, but not much).

CHRIS JERICHO PROMO & SEGMENT WITH MJF- great
Jericho cut a good promo about how his inability to beat MJF is gnawing at him and challenges MJF to a match at All Out in which in Jericho doesn’t win he will “never wrestle in AEW again.” That’s some interesting and very good wording on Jericho’s part. Sure, he teased becoming a full-time commentator (which is reason enough for me to cheer with all my heart that he’ll win, because his commentary has been the most grating of any commentator I have ever heard with the exception of Matt Striker), but it 1) allows him to wrestle in WWE again without going back on his word and 2) from the way he phrased things earlier (“if I can’t beat MJF, I don’t deserve to be in AEW) it puts AEW over as having better wrestlers than WWE if Jericho ever does go back to WWE after losing).
MJF came out to respond to this challenge and cut a great promo accepting it. I’m not crazy about doing two retirement angles at the same time, but I will admit that it was the only thing I could think of that would I would believe would get MJF to accept another match against Jericho.

VARSITY BLONDS PROMO- fine

ALL OUT #1 CONTENDERSHIP TOURNAMENT SEMIFINAL MATCH: Lucha Bros. (w/Alex Abrahantes) vs. Varsity Blonds (w/Julia Hart)- 5.75/10
Jurassic Express and the Elite came out to watch the match. The wrestlers did their stuff. I thought the Varsity Blonds looked very weak losing to a move that Sammy Guevara survived a more extreme version of onto the floor last week.
The Bucks initiated a post-match confrontation but were chased off by the combined might of the babyfaces.

ANDRADE VIDEO PACKAGE/PROMO ON PAC- good

RED VELVET vs. JAMIE HAYTER (w/Dr. Britt Baker D.M.D. & Rebel)- 4.25/10
That standing moonsault from Red Velvet was Botchamania fodder. Uch.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- meh
The heels went to beat Red Velvet down but Kris Statlander came out to make the save. Britt narrowly escaped Statlander’s finisher. This felt very formulaic. I think it would have been better for her to come out when Rebel got involved in the match and chase the other two away.

DARK ORDER PROMO- bad
They’ve broken up because of the “should we help Adam Page or not” thing. You’d think that Page would have clarified to them that it’s okay to help me if I’m getting the sh*t beaten out of me by a vicious gang. The other problem here was the deliveries. Evil Uno’s delivery is what it is and I will accept it, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t amplify the corny feel a segment might have, and with the dialogue in this one and Alex Reynold’s high school play delivery, this was not good. It came off like one of those early Prophecy segments in ROH.

TONY SCHIAVONE INTERVIEWS CM PUNK- GREAT!
Tony asks Punk “what is the one thing that brought you back to the ring?” I guess that despite his repeated claims throughout the night, Tony didn’t actually watch Punk’s promo from Rampage. Or the highlights of it they showed earlier tonight.
Punk had fun with the crowd (including teasing that Dragon is coming in) and built up both himself and his match with Darby Allin.

MIRO PROMO- good
I like that they’re ramping up both how dangerous he feels and how deranged he sounds in proportion. He wants Eddie Kingston.

JON MOXLEY, EDDIE KINGSTON, & DARBY ALLIN (w/Sting) vs. THE WINGMEN (Ryan Nemeth, J.D. Drake, & Cezar Bononi) (w/”Pretty” Peter Avalon)- 2/10
Why are our top babyfaces being booked against jobbers all the time?

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- more jobber stuff
Daniel Garcia jumped Darby from behind, then bailed when Sting and pals came to make the save.

ALEX MARVEZ’S INTERVIEW WITH TAY CONTI IS INTERRUPTED BY THE BUNNY- fine
Nice to see that someone finally remembered that Conti is a member of the Dark Order, seeing as how she has been absent from all of their backstage segments for months. The Bunny asked her why she is still hanging out with “those losers in the Dark Order.” As I pointed out, though, she really isn’t. At least not on camera, and that kind of makes her look like an asshole, doesn’t it? “Sure, we can hang out… so long as it’s not in public.”
Allie tries to recruit her to the Hardy Family Office so they can work together in the Casino Battle Royal at All Out. Tay rips the contract up so Allie slaps her, starting a brawl that was quickly broken up by security. This was a passable (if slightly clumsy) way to both get over the idea of the battle royale and reinforce the idea of dissension within the Dark Order.

FTR PROMO- great, but…
Cash’s arm is apparently not working right… but AEW is willing to clear him for just one match? I guess I’m okay with that if he is. This promo made FTR feel like huge babyfaces.

TONY SCHIAVONE’S INTERVIEW WITH THE ELITE (MINUS THE TAG TEAMS) IS INTERRUPTED BY CHRISTIAN CAGE- meh
Words were exchanged and a fight broke out. Like with Kofi making the claim to Lashley about MVP on Raw a few months ago, the claim that Callis is maliciously manipulating Kenny Omega falls short due to a lack of evidence that anything Callis has done hasn’t worked out to Omega’s betterment.
Anyway, there was a fight and Christian got beaten up until Kazarian came out with a pipe to chase them away. He’s been “hunting” the Elite for months now, but he rarely seems to have actual matches against them. Shouldn’t he be asking Tony Khan for matches against them?
Also, it would have been nice to see Jurassic Express have Christian’s back like he has had theirs.

JON MOXLEY PROMO- great, but…
At the PPV he is wrestling… Satoshi Kojima? Weren’t they building up for a match against Tanahashi? Kind of makes Tanahashi seem like a coward if you don’t present some sort of reason for why it couldn’t be him.

THE GUNN CLUB vs. THE FACTORY (Q.T. Marshall, Aarow Solow, & Nick Comoroto)- 2/10
They’re putting Big Show vs. Q.T. Marshall on a PPV. Really. Wight was on commentary for this match. Dumbass Q.T. distracted himself pointing at Wight and got rolled up. I just Q.T. get humiliated here, so why should I feel the need to pay to see it on PPV?

DAN LAMBERT PROMO- F*CKING TREMENDOUS!

MALAKAI BLACK INTERVIEWS ARN ANDERSON- a good promo for a match I can’t possibly care about.

MALAKAI BLACK vs. BROCK ANDERSON (w/Arn Anderson)- 0.5/10
Brock got some offense in, but mostly Black kicked his ass in a short match.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- pointless
Black gets a chair. Arn hops in to stop him. Arn- yes, old Arn Anderson- gets to be the first one to block the Black Mass... so Malakai just kicked him in the nuts and then hit the move anyway. Malakai Black menaced the downed Andersons until Lee Johnson came out, and the undefeated and much more experienced Black inexplicably backed down from this rookie who has lost most of his matches. THIS was the main event segment. A segment that at best tred water in this story, and set up a match between the new big scary heel and some dork who isn’t even good enough to be booked on Dynamite more than once a quarter. But hey! We’ve got to give Black the main event spot because we want to make him feel like a star and make him a big deal for when Cody beats him.


This was a decent to good episode of Dynamite until main event segment. It feels like they’re doing a good job building to a PPV that just doesn’t feel exciting because so many of the wrestlers are in what feel like sub-optimal matches (or not booked at all).

STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:
1. Tony Schiavone put over the upcoming Dynamite in Norfolk by telling us that he has a lot of friends looking forward to coming to the show. Then Jim Ross completely deflated that fact by telling us that Tony’ friends were “getting free tickets.” Moron.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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cero2k
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Re: BRM Reviews the 8/25/2021 Dynamite (good until the main event)

Post by cero2k » Aug 26th, '21, 14:41

Big Red Machine wrote: Aug 26th, '21, 14:34

MALAKAI BLACK vs. BROCK ANDERSON (w/Arn Anderson)- 0.5/10
Brock got some offense in, but mostly Black kicked his ass in a short match.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- pointless
Black gets a chair. Arn hops in to stop him. Arn- yes, old Arn Anderson- gets to be the first one to block the Black Mass... so Malakai just kicked him in the nuts and then hit the move anyway. Malakai Black menaced the downed Andersons until Lee Johnson came out, and the undefeated and much more experienced Black inexplicably backed down from this rookie who has lost most of his matches. THIS was the main event segment. A segment that at best tred water in this story, and set up a match between the new big scary heel and some dork who isn’t even good enough to be booked on Dynamite more than once a quarter. But hey! We’ve got to give Black the main event spot because we want to make him feel like a star and make him a big deal for when Cody beats him.

For someone who is so adamant that heels need to be booed and babyfaces need to be cheered, how can you fault them for going for cheap heat with Black. Dude is getting cheered and 'one more time' treatment for being himself, being an ass kicker is only gonna get him more over. You make Cody more important than Cody himself does.

Also, how was that not a squash rating?
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Big Red Machine
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Re: BRM Reviews the 8/25/2021 Dynamite (good until the main event)

Post by Big Red Machine » Aug 26th, '21, 18:28

cero2k wrote: Aug 26th, '21, 14:41
Big Red Machine wrote: Aug 26th, '21, 14:34

MALAKAI BLACK vs. BROCK ANDERSON (w/Arn Anderson)- 0.5/10
Brock got some offense in, but mostly Black kicked his ass in a short match.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- pointless
Black gets a chair. Arn hops in to stop him. Arn- yes, old Arn Anderson- gets to be the first one to block the Black Mass... so Malakai just kicked him in the nuts and then hit the move anyway. Malakai Black menaced the downed Andersons until Lee Johnson came out, and the undefeated and much more experienced Black inexplicably backed down from this rookie who has lost most of his matches. THIS was the main event segment. A segment that at best tred water in this story, and set up a match between the new big scary heel and some dork who isn’t even good enough to be booked on Dynamite more than once a quarter. But hey! We’ve got to give Black the main event spot because we want to make him feel like a star and make him a big deal for when Cody beats him.

For someone who is so adamant that heels need to be booed and babyfaces need to be cheered, how can you fault them for going for cheap heat with Black. Dude is getting cheered and 'one more time' treatment for being himself, being an ass kicker is only gonna get him more over. You make Cody more important than Cody himself does.
My issue isn't with heels getting cheered (the crowd will do what the crowd is going to do) so much as it is with promotions doing things that they know will encourage the wrong reaction. Britt cutting a total babyface promo in her home town is a perfect example of that.

Cheap heat is a fine way to try to get an ass-kicker heel booed, but cheap heat doesn't work for me when it feels like it's something the character is doing either specifically for the sake of being booed (which most characters0 and certainly Malakai Black- shouldn't care about) or when it feels like something being done at the booker's instructions to set something else up, and this fit both. Why did Malakai Black get a chair? He comes across like a guy who thinks ahead and has a specific goal in mind, and I can't imagine that whatever his goal was would be so unimportant that he would let an unarmed Lee Johnson scare him off. The result is that it felt like a pre-planned segment whose goal was to get Black booed and set up for a match with Johnson.

And the fact that he has been programmed against Cody is a part of the reason why Black is getting cheered. If they had put him against Page or Moxley or Jericho or a babyface Omega, I don't think he gets cheered anywhere near as much.

cero2k wrote: Aug 26th, '21, 14:41
Also, how was that not a squash rating?
You're right. I really should have had the whole thing (post-match included) as "no rating, bad segment." I was probably feeling a little harsher because this was the main event they did this with.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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