BRM Reviews AEW New Year's Smash: Week 1

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews AEW New Year's Smash: Week 1

Post by Big Red Machine » Jan 8th, '21, 14:20

TH2 & THE ACCLAIMED vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS & SCU (Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian)- 5.75/10
Chris Jericho is on commentary tonight. The acclaimed dissed Snoop Dogg, who will be here later tonight.
Excalibur mentions that Kaz and Daniels vowed to never team together again the next time they lose a regular tag match… and Ross immediately questions whether they’ll actually stick to the stipulation. Way to undermine the company, dumbass.
The match was a bunch of moves and a finish that was far too cute.

Daniels and Kaz let everyone know about their silly announcement that they’ll split up if they lose again. They also told the Bucks that they’ll have their backs, but also want a title shot.

Excalibur reminds us that the records reset at the beginning of the year, which is really arbitrary. It must suck to go on a winning streak in December and then have it forgotten.

The ring skirt is promoting Cody’s show, too. I’ll give them a pass on this and assume this was something the network asked them to do.

He won’t interfere in Fenix’s title shot tonight, but he will make Omega pay at some point.

Chuck tells us that Trent will be out for four or five months due to the assault last week by the Video Game Geeks. Said geeks show up to interrupt Chuck’s promo… and Chuck just stands there, astoundingly calm for someone staring down the group that viciously assaulted his best friend.
They very politely agreed to have a match next week where if Chuck Taylor loses to Miro, he will become Miro’s young-boy until after Kip & Penelope’s wedding.


The rest of the Inner Circle watched from the stage. Wardlow won a very good hoss-fight cleanly. We got a nice, respectful fist-bump after the match.

Snoop mostly just stood there.
They took shots at Vince over the Twitch thing. Matt wants Private Party to sign contracts with him for 30% of their earnings. Basically, they’re the up-and-coming young wrestlers with potential, and Matt is their scuzzy trainer trying to use them as a meal ticket. On commentary, Jericho pretty much explained the joke for those who didn’t get it.

Why are they having a weigh-in for a match with no weight-limit attached to it? Isn’t Tony Khan supposedly the “detail guy?” How did this slip past him?
Things quickly got dumber, as Taz got upset because Cage was asked to weigh in first. WHO THE F*CK CARES?!
Darby was wary of getting jumped. Taz made fun of Darby for being small, so Darby cut a promo on him. Darby wants to just start fighting because he’s sure the attack is inevitable. Sting saw that violence was about to happen, so he came out to back Darby up. Team Taz chickened out while Taz cut a promo to build up next week’s match.
This would have made a lot more sense as a contract signing. The only way the weighing part was relevant was that it gave Taz an opening to make fun of Darby for being small so Darby could cut his promo, but you could have just had Taz make fun of Darby for being small during a contract signing, so all this did was create a pointless logic problem.

Based on the way they’ve done these segments so far, it’s going to be a stretch for the Inner Circle to turn on Jericho any time soon.

A RECAP OF SOMETHING ABSOLUTELY BAFFLING FROM DARK- Marko Stunt is in the ring and is approached by an even shorter person in a Dark Order mask who tries to goad him into accepting a match without Jungle Boy or Luchasaurus at ringside. I don’t think we’d ever seen this person before. Maybe some framing by one of the announcers would have been good?

Alex Marvez casually says that Marko was “having some fun there with Negative 1.”
1. That didn’t look like fun. It looked like one person goading another.

After bringing this segment up, Marvez asks Marko about it. JUST KIDDING! He asks him “what’s next for the Jurassic Express?” So what was the point of showing us the video package and then having Marvez bring it up?
Marko says that they’re going after the tag titles. FTR and Tully Blanchard show up and point that Marko shouldn’t be referring to the team as “we” because he doesn’t contribute sh*t. Marko challenges them to face him and Jungle Boy next week. It will be a lot of fun watching FTR rip Marko apart.

MATT SYDAL vs. CODY RHODES (w/Snoop Dogg)- 7/10
They got Snoop Dogg to record a new version of Cody’s theme song. Arn Anderson isn’t at ringside with Cody as usual because… um…
This was a great, well-paced wrestling match. Cody won clean.

Cody had accidentally punched Serpentico on the outside when he was aiming for Sydal, so Dr. Luther & Serpentico jumped him after the match. The fans wanted Snoop Dogg to help but he didn’t. Sydal eventually did. Then, once the heels were defeated, Snoop Coward decided to steal the glory by stopping Sydal from going to the top rope so he could come off the top rope himself with an embarrassingly bad splash. Jericho was in full clown mode the whole time.

AEW WORLD WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH: Hikaru Shida(c) vs. Abadon- 3.5/10
They started brawling on the ramp. Early on Abadon dragged Shida under the ring and came out with blood all over her chin, and we’re supposed to believe that she… but into one of Shida’s arteries, I guess, based on the amount of blood. This is SOOOOOOO f*cking dumb.
Abadon beat Shida up for 95% of the match. Shida eventually hit her finisher and won. I hope to never see Abadon again.

Conti cut what was essentially a babyface promo to build up to her NWA World Women’s Title match against Serena Deeb next week. Then Anna Jay announced that she and the Dark Order would be at ringside as well, so get ready for some interference.

Pac did all of the talking. He started off by saying that they always move as a pack… except for tonight, when Fenix will be alone because… um… he’s supposed to be a babyface this week.

AEW WORLD TITLE MATCH: Kenny Omega(c) (w/Don Callis) vs. Rey Fenix- 8/10
I like that their new video game show is on right after Dynamite, as it makes it a lot more believable to me that they could go well into the next hour if necessary.
They were on the outside forever without being counted out because “no one wants to see this match end on a count-out.” Well if that’s the case, why aren’t all AEW World Title matches contested under “no count-outs” rules?

I thought Fenix doing a nip-up out of a V-Trigger to deliver a superkick and then sell was stupid. I can buy that sort of thing coming off the ropes, or if you don’t go down, but a nip-up requires for too much concentration and body control for me to be able to buy someone doing it right after taking a knee to the face hard enough to knock them backwards off their feet (and, of course, moments later, Omega hit a V-Trigger and Ross tried to sell it to me as certainly the finish). In general, the match was a little too spotty for my tastes, but it was still excellent (and was definitely helped by the fact that we hadn’t seen anything else like this so far tonight).

Callis throws it to the back, where Kingston and Pac have been assaulted by Kingston’s group. Again… it’s convenient that these guys decided not to come ringside with their friend like they usually do.
Callis wanted Omega to end Rey Fenix’s career. Moxley came out with a barbed-wire baseball bat to make the save. Gallows and Anderson showed up and attacked Moxley. Jericho on commentary is shouting about they don’t work here and the announcers are wondering if this was an “Impact trap” as these big meanies are beating up top babyface Jon Moxley… and the crowd, of course, is chanting “TOO SWEET!” because “YAY! The guys we like are here! Who cares what they’re doing? We just want to see them!” F*ck 2021 wrestling fans.
Like me, Jim Ross is wondering where security is. And it’s not even like this is the first time outside wrestlers have jumped into the ring on this show, either. Omega hit Moxley with the barbed-wire bad a few times.
FINALLY someone gets off their asses in the back to try to make the save. Is it Sting? Cody? Darby Allin? Some other top babyface? Or even a midcard babyface? NOPE! It’s TWO JOBBERS (Brian Pillman Jr. & Griff Garrison). They get their asses kicked, but at least they’ve inspired the other jobbers around ringside to try to do the right thing. It’s a shame none of the babyfaces in the locker room have any sort of moral convictions. Ross used the phrase “hostile takeover,” which is one I would have avoided at all costs.
Moxley got beaten up forever until eventually the Young Bucks got off their asses to put a stop to things.
Garrison and Pillman each grabbed on of Kenny’s arms and were each attacked by Gallows and one of the Jacksons to free Kenny. That was a fine spot, but Jericho asking if it mean they were working together was silly, because if they were working together, wouldn’t the Bucks be helping Bullet Club beat up on Moxley? Or maybe they all are, as the Bucks joined them for a Too Sweet at the end. Things making sense from minute to minute has never been one of strong suits of the creative forces behind this company.

This was… certainly a momentous episode of Dynamite. In was very good in the ring (though not as good as NXT), but creatively it was… well… mostly still Dynamite. I am very aware that I might just be having a viscerally negative reaction to the Bullet Club reunion for it’s very n.W.o. feel (and doing the hand signals doesn’t help), and the fact that trying to do the n.W.o. all over again is one of those things that I would avoid doing at all costs if I were running a wrestling promotion up against WWE (or in any position, really) because it’s one of those things that just screams “WE’RE STILL TRYING TO BE THE ATTITUDE ERA” despite that strategy having failed a million times before in a #2 televised promotion, so I’m trying to keep an open mind, but I think it’s fair to say that how they handle this will have a big impact (no pun intended) on a lot of people’s faith in their booking team.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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Re: BRM Reviews AEW New Year's Smash: Week 1

Post by XIV » Jan 9th, '21, 12:20

Omega v Fenix gets 5 stars. Meltzer’s hard-on for Omega continues to rage on.

It was an okay enough match, but certainly not a “classic” or a match I’d wish to re-watch.

I think the first thing about a 5 star match is that you’d want to see it again and again. See Rock v Austin ah Wrestlemania, Shawn v Undertaker at Wrestlemania, Triple H vs Cactus Jack at Royal Rumble, Daniels v Joe v AJ Styles at Unbreakable.

All matches that you could watch again and again, and they still put you right back in the story and you feel the whole match.

This doesn’t come close to that.
Have A Nice Day!

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