BRM Reviews the 3/2/2012 Smackdown

[Big Red Machine]

OPENING SEGMENT- Sheamus was good, everyone else wasn’t.

SHEAMUS vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/Vickie Guerrero)- 4.75/10. Needed A LOT more time.

SEGMENT IN TEDDY LONG’S OFFICE- dumb. I cannot stand Teddy Long. He is SO boring it isn’t funny. Get him off of my TV screen

HEATH SLATER vs. SANTINO MARELLA- 3/10

NATALYA & EVE SEGMENT- Painfully bad

EVE TORRES vs. NATALYA- DUD! The only good part about this match was Cole ripping into Booker T for his stupidity.

CODY RHODES & BIG SHOW SEGMENT- okay

MARK HENRY vs. THE BIG SHOW- 6/10.
Good big-man match.

RANDY ORTON PROMO- okay

TEDDY LONG TELLS DREW MCINTYRE THAT IF HE DOESN'T WIN TONIGHT, HE WILL BE FIRED- this is at least the third time this has happened, so why should we believe that anything will actually happen tonight? And considering that this is the third time we have had this stip and Drew hasn't been fired yet, Drew whining about it made him look bad

IF MCINTYRE LOSES, HE WILL BE FIRED: Justin Gabriel vs. Drew McIntyre- DUD!
The blowoff to this angle lasts two minutes. In fact, almost all of the matches in this angle have been under three minutes, which makes Drew look like a jobber and makes Teddy Long look like an idiot for hiring a jobber.

DANIEL BRYAN PROMO- AWESOME (although cutting a promo on a TV show in which you run people down for watching TV is a bit awkward)

RANDY ORTON vs. DANIEL BRYAN (w/AJ!)- 6.5/10.
Not good enough for a main event, but I will let it go because it built towards another match at Mania

JOHNNY ACE MAKES KANE VS. AKSANA FOR NEXT WEEK- good

Overall, not a very good episode of Smackdown, but Dragon vs. Orton and Henry vs. Big Show made it watchable

STUPID ANNOUNCER QUOTES:

1. Booker T- Booker starts to talk about how winning the title changes you, then randomly goes on a rant calling AJ an "in-house rat." I will give Booker the benefit of the doubt and assume that he is saying that Dragon is treating AJ like wrestlers would treat ring-rats (i.e. using them for stuff, from sex to rides, and, in this case, help in matches), and that AJ either doesn't know or doesn't care that she is being used because she is either naive or gullible. Even giving Booker the benefit of the doubt with this... his tone did not convey this at all. I had to go back and listen to what he said three times just to make sure that he wasn't saying that Dragon has changed for the worse because of AJ's influence on him. This was also a poor choice of words, as "rat? doesn't seem to be a term that people in the business use anymore, so, to those who don't know what it means, it sounds like he is horribly insulting AJ.

Following up on this, Booker says that AJ sees Dragon as a meal-ticket. Where the hell is he getting this from? Thankfully Matthews called him out on it.