BRM Reviews the 12/21/2020 Raw (bad)

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews the 12/21/2020 Raw (bad)

Post by Big Red Machine » Dec 22nd, '20, 21:08

OPENING SEGMENT- bad, aside from Charlotte
Charlotte comes out and cuts a total heel promo about how she’s the greatest and “when a friend needs help… and there’s something in it for me,” she’ll always come help. That last line was so deliberate that, unlike with Sasha, I can’t possibly imagine that the idea here isn’t for Charlotte to come off like a heel. She brought out Asuka, waited for Asuka to praise her, and then jumped in so, “so, about that Raw Women’s Championship…” before she was interrupted by Nia and Shayna.
That’s when this fell off a cliff. Shayna and Nia started out with the horrendous, not even close to clever holiday- jokes. They have a naughty list, “but instead of coal, we hand out beatings.” “Yeah, season’s beatings.” Kill me now.
Then Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke came out, and called Shayna ugly and Nia fat. You all know me. You know that I’m not someone who snowflake who hops at things like this and gets offended. I’m all for people being mean to each other on a wrestling show. But when you’re preaching with your women’s division the way that WWE tries to, I do think you ought to think twice before having to two large-breasted blondes who were only signed to the company because of how they look in bathing suits come out and make fun of the appearance of the two people in this segment who least fit the traditional standard of beauty. Especially when they’re coming out completely unbidden. These two supposed babyfaces came out here just to make fun of the heels… and they chose to first insult their looks, and then make fun of them for losing the tag titles when they weren’t even the ones who took the belts from them. Dana and Mandy came off like petty mean girls here, and not even the ones who are the queen bee but rather the hangers-on that the queen bee attracts. When Charlotte proceeded to treat them like total peons, I just nodded my head and said “yeah, that makes sense.”
Charlotte suggested that we have the already-scheduled Mandy and Dana vs. Baszler and Nia match right now, so that she could sit and enjoy seeing these four underlings fight for her entertainment. Everyone agreed and a referee came out, so we got…

SHAYNA BASZLER & NIA JAX vs. MANDY ROSE & DANA BROOKE- 4.75/10
When we went to a commercial before this match, Charlotte’s music was playing (because she was the last one to talk, I guess). When we came back from the commercial, the tag champs were on commentary and Charlotte’s music is still playing. Why is her music even playing through the commercial at all? There’s no one there for it to entertain!
This match went WAY longer than it needed to before the heels won clean. Just to show you who was actually important here, the camera kept cutting to Charlotte on commentary every ten seconds or so. Despite the heels winning clean, the babyfaces attacked them after the match. Byron Saxton dismissed this unsportsmanlike bullsh*t as “making a statement.”

THE HURT BUSINESS BULLY A VALUED BACKSTAGE CREWMEMBER- This guy was wearing a New Day shirt, so they bullied him. At least this time they gave their victim a free Hurt Business shirt for his trouble.

THE HURT BUSINESS CELEBRATE HOW GREAT THEY ARE IN MVP’S VIP LOUNGE- bad
They talked about how great they are. MVP brought in a photographer to take a picture of them posing together. Dude… you’re on national TV. Just grab one of the camera operators and have someone grab the screencap for you.
Anyway, they took their picture, but R-Truth came out of nowhere to photobomb them because he’s an asshole. The 24/7 goofs then all ran around the ring and around the Christmas set-up on the stage. This was dumb and pointless.
When the goof patrol left, Matt Riddle and Jeff Hardy came out. Matt Riddle suggested that they “get toasted” and listen to either Joe Rogan’s podcast or a Dave Chapelle special. Riddle is now openly advocating drug use. I know it’s just pot, but given Jeff Hardy’s history, I’m not sure that I really want them to hang out together. Jeff cut a promo saying that faith and pride were more important than money. It was corny.

They promised us that we would hear from Randy Orton later tonight about his “infernal actions” last night (i.e. setting The Fiend on fire). If you want me to think of what Randy did as being so heinous, how about you don’t make puns about it?

SARAH SCHREIBER INTERVIEWS ANGEL GARZA- He’s hits on her. Remember when they did this for months with Charly Caruso and it went nowhere?

ANGEL GARZA vs. DREW GULAK- 3/10
Garza won a short match cleanly.

CHARLY CARUSO INTERVIEWS AJ STYLES- good
Holy crap! The interviewer asked the exact question that I was thinking of as a viewer at home (if AJ is so angry at Miz for screwing him out of the title last night, why did he agree to be on Miz’ talk show?), and the wrestler gave a logical answer (because he wants to hear what Miz has to say for himself, with the implied threat that if AJ isn’t happy with Miz’s statement, AJ and Omos are going to kick Miz and Morrison’s asses).

MIZ TV WITH SPECIAL GUEST AJ STYLES- very bad
Tom Phillips claimed that Miz was “despondent” because of his failure to win the title when he cashed in MITB last night, but he didn’t sound anything close to “despondent” to me.
Miz tried to apologize to AJ by offering him a role in the next Marine movie. Arguing happened. Drew came out, and he, Keith Lee, and Sheamus recited lame poetry. It’s like the people who put this show together never learn.
The babyfaces decided to attack the heels now even though they already have a Street Fight scheduled for later tonight. The babyfaces won the brawl, but AJ kicked Keith Lee into Sheamus so of course they started arguing.

KEITH LEE AND SHEAMUS ARGUE BACKSTAGE UNTIL DREW MCINTYRE YELLS AT THEM EVEN LOUDER THAN THEY WERE ALREADY YELLING AT EACH OTHER- fine
It’s nice to see someone acting reasonable for once. Drew sent Sheamus away, then talked Lee into trusting him for tonight.

RICOCHET vs. T-BAR (w/Retribution)- 5/10
T-Bar won pretty much cleanly.

NEW DAY PROMO EARLIER TODAY- good
This was the usual “it’s not how high you get but how many times get back up and start climbing back towards the top” promo.

THE HARDY BROS. (Jeff Hardy & Matt Riddle) vs. THE HURT BUSINESS (Bobby Lashley & MVP) (w/Shelton Benjamin & Cedric Alexander)- 6/10
The terrible referee ordered the bell to be rung even though the Hurt Business had not yet determined which of them would start the match. Jeff was the babyface in peril and he eventually tapped out to the Hurt Lock.

THE DRIFTER TALKS- fine
Jaxson Ryker is now with Elias because Elias’ music “changed his life.” Cool. An explanation for Ryker’s character changed.

JAXSON RYKER (w/“The Drifter” Elias Sampson) vs. GRAN METALIK (w/Lincé Dorado)- no rating, fine segment
Ryker dominated Gran Metalik, but Metalik at least got to take Elias out first. That being said, I did not like Elias being allowed to sit on the turnbuckle.

RANDY ORTON PROMO AND OTHER DUMB SH*T SEGMENT- bad
Randy comes out and cuts a long, over dramatic promo. When he finally gets to his big line about how he took The Fiend out, the lights go off and Fiend magic happens and suddenly there is a whole f*cking playground in the ring, complete with a swing set and a slide. Alexa Bliss! is sitting on one of the swings and cuts her own overdramatic rehearsed speech bullsh*t promo about how The Fiend built her “Alexa’s Playground” and if The Fiend ever comes back, it will be worse than anyone’s worst nightmares or whatever. I hope everyone out there who got excited when The Fiend first appeared are happy with what they’ve unleashed on the world by accepting and giving positive feedback to what was so clearly more of the same dumb Bray Wyatt bullsh*t that we had been getting for years.

SARAH SCHREIBER INTERVIEWS PEYTON ROYCE & LACEY EVANS- good

PEYTON ROYCE & LACEY EVANS vs. CHARLOTTE FLAIR & ASUKA- 4/10
In a six-minute match, the tag champs almost lost the team whose gimmick is that they don’t work together well.

TITUS O’NEIL DOES CHARITY WORK- Titus was standing next to a really old person and not wearing a mask. Not cool, bro.

STREET FIGHT: Drew McIntyre, Keith Lee, & Sheamus vs. John Morrison, The Miz, & AJ Styles (w/Omos)- 6.75/10
This is a Street Fight and these teams have already brawled tonight… and they’re starting it with chain wrestling and people calmly waiting for tags? What the f*ck?!
They proceeded to have the tamest Street Fight I’ve ever seen, with some dumb, holiday-themed weapons. Also, someone decided to put food on the tables at ringside, so the wrestlers were bumping onto the food and (hopefully paper) plates… and also, they’re wasting food. It’s the holiday season. Aren’t there orphans they could have given this food to?
There was one good moment towards the end when Drew was setting up for the Claymore but Sheamus tagged himself in to steal the glory and go for the Brogue Kick, but Lee immediately tagged himself in to pay Sheamus back. Omos put Morrison through a table for no reason. Sheamus and Lee stared to argue after the match because pro wrestling.


Another bad episode of Raw. Not only have they learned nothing from their bad ratings, but they spent the night hyping up a pointless Street Fight that turned out to be very un-Street Fight-ish, killing the damaging the gimmick for when they inevitably try to hot-shot it again (which will probably be in two weeks). Morons.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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cero2k
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Re: BRM Reviews the 12/21/2020 Raw (bad)

Post by cero2k » Dec 22nd, '20, 22:40

Red, question. Is there a shoot reason why Alexa Bliss is the Fiend's prop? Is she legit injured or something that called for her to become this thing and stop wrestling?
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Big Red Machine
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Re: BRM Reviews the 12/21/2020 Raw (bad)

Post by Big Red Machine » Dec 22nd, '20, 23:14

cero2k wrote: Dec 22nd, '20, 22:40 Red, question. Is there a shoot reason why Alexa Bliss is the Fiend's prop? Is she legit injured or something that called for her to become this thing and stop wrestling?
Not that I've heard of, and when she has a concussion, we normally hear about it because she's pretty open about that sort of thing.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

Upcoming Reviews:
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
DGUSA Open the Ultimate Gate 2013
ROH/CMLL Global Wars Espectacular: Day 3

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