BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

Post by Big Red Machine » Feb 27th, '18, 19:02

OPENING SEGMENT- weird
We start out with Alexa Bliss! and Mickie James already in the ring. Alexa talks up her win, then gives Mickie credit for doing her part… except that Mickie didn’t really help Alexa much because she was already eliminated by the time Alexa entered the match!
She cut a promo on the other women in the Elimination Chamber, after which… WOW! Alexa got my text asking her where the WrestleMania sign was!
Alexa then turned her attention to Asuka and cut a promo on her. Asuka came out… and Alexa just kept talking. She said that Nia deserved to be in the title match, not Asuka. Alexa made fun of Asuka, and then said that Asuka had better wipe the smile off of her face or else Nia will… and just like that, Nia Jax came down to the ring.
Asuka knocked by Alexa and Mickie down with sucker-shots but was then run over by Nia. Asuka managed to catch Nia in a triangle but Alexa and Mickie put the boots to her. Sasha and Bayley came out to make the save, working together perfectly, and at his point I am forced to ask the following question: Is this show being broadcast from another dimension?
Mickie is not only Alexa’s lackey, but is 100% heel again without any sort of turn. Nia also seems like she’s back to being Alexa’s lackey (it came off like they had set a trap for Asuka) and Bayley and Sasha are working perfectly together without so much as a sideways glance despite the fact that Sasha “stabbed her best friend in the heart” by betraying her last night. It’s the only reasonable explanation.
Anyway, Asuka almost knocked Nia down with her kicks but got cut off when Alexa floored her with the big right hand. The three heels then left together to Alexa’s music, and we went to a commercial. When we came back from commercial we got…

ALEXA BLISS!, NIA JAX, & MICKIE JAMES vs. SASHA BANKS, BAYLEY, & ASUKA- 6.5/10
This was a solid six-woman tag match. By far the best moment of this match came right before the commercial break, when Alexa had just given Sasha a beating and Sasha rolled out to the floor, and she’s on the floor, on her back, in pain… and a fan leaned over her in order to shout “why are you such a bad friend?!”
The heels first got the heat on Bayley, who managed to escape and Sasha tagged in. Sasha, too, was eventually cut off and beaten down, but she, too, managed to make it back to her own corner… only to have Bayley jump down from the apron and not receive her tag. Mickie pulled her back for a nearfall but then Sasha made the hot tag to Asuka who dominated Mickie and get the win, but not before they did a spot to show that Bayley was willing to help Asuka, but not Sasha. Asuka made Mickie tap to get the win. This was much different from how I imagined Bayley responding to Sasha’s betrayal, but I do like it.

JOHN CENA PROMO- He wants to challenge The Undertaker at WrestleMania but he has been “told that that match is impossible.” By who? If Taker shows up and says he wants to face Cena, am I supposed to think that WWE isn’t going to book him? Anyway, Cena says that he’s going to show up on Smackdown tomorrow to try to find a way to get to WrestleMania. Why doesn’t he just declare himself an entrant into the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royale?
(That all being said, if they really want to push this story, what they should do on Smackdown is have Cena answer a Bobby Roode US Title Open Challenge and lose cleanly.)

BRAY WYATT vs. HEATH SLATER (w/Rhyno)- squash
Then Bray cut a promo on Matt that was supposed to make it sound like he is going nuts, which kind of worked.

THE MIZ PROMO- He claimed to be just 62 days away from becoming “the longest-reigning Intercontinental Champion of all-time,” which made no sense to me until I realized he meant cumulative days as champion. He really should have specified what he meant.
He also complained about not having a Mania match yet, and also pointed to the sign. He bad-mouthed Rollins and Balor, then bad-mouthed Kurt for not being able to tell him who he would face at WrestleMania six weeks out. He calls out whoever he is supposed to face tonight, and we get…

SETH ROLLINS vs. THE MIZ (w/the Miz-tourage)- 6.5/10
Rollins won but his hip is injured. Then Balor came out to steal Rollins’ moment, because I guess Balor is just a dick. Seth left in the middle of Finn’s entrance.

FINN BALOR vs. THE MIZ (w/the Miz-tourage)- 6/10
That’s right! It’s not Finn who was being a dick. It’s Kurt Angle who is the dick. Not only is he forcing Miz to compete in some sort of personal gauntlet without telling him, but he didn’t tell anyone about it, including Seth (who clearly got annoyed at Finn) and the announcers (who had to stand there blathering on about how they have no idea what’s going on).
The match ended by immediate DQ when the Miz-tourage jumped Balor, and it’s hard to be too upset with Miz about this. Gallows & Anderson came out to make the save. Then Kurt appeared on the TitanTron (and from the way he was talking, this sounded very pre-taped as well) saying that he had already told Miz about this Finn Balor match, which doesn’t seem true at all. First of all, if he told Miz about the Balor match, why wouldn’t he have also told him about the Rollins match is Rollins’ match was first, and why would he feel the need to keep everyone else in the dark about it?
Kurt then ejects everyone’s friends from ringside and orders the match to continue one-on-one, and he warns Miz that if there isn’t a “clear winner” Miz won’t be going to WrestleMania. Coach and Graves immediately poked (obvious) holes in this last part, with Coach noting that a win for Miz and a loss for him here achieve the same result, and Graves suggesting that Miz just take a count-out, as that will still give us a “clear winner.”
Miz had the advantage early but Balor made his comeback and won. The announcers argued over who should get a title shot. All agreed that Rollins deserved one, but only Cole was insistent that Balor should have one, too. Graves was completely right in this, to the point where Coach switched sides mid-argument. All of this just makes Cole look bad, and makes Balor’s claim to a title shot almost heelish because of the big advantage he had going in of Miz having already wrestled.

RENEE YOUNG INTERVIEWS SETH ROLLINS- yup. He’s pissed at Balor. He also says that he wants The Miz at WrestleMania.


At one point Cole buried Miz for “running out of gas” in his second match of the night when Rollins managed to go over an hour last week. This is just about the worst thing they could do with that Rollins performance.



ROMAN REIGNS PROMO- the newest scheme to get people to cheer for Roman is revealed.
Roman cut a promo positioning himself as the only person brave enough to speak truth to power and saying that Brock no-showed tonight’s show because he doesn’t respect the WWE or its fans, and that he is an entitled little punk who “hides behind his contract.” They did a very good job with this, and the use of the Dana White photo was very clever, and this did get the people in the building to cheer Roman... but the problem still remains that they have tried so many different schemes (have Rock endorse him, have Bryan endorse him, have Foley endorse him, make him a patriot, shoot on Cena, pair him up with Sasha, have him go all Attitude Era and try to kill someone with a motor vehicle) that my immediate reaction to this was that not “Roman is right!” but rather “this is their newest scheme to make us cheer for Roman.”

BRAUN STROWMAN PHONE PROMO- it’s a phone promo with words on the screen. Some of the words included “symphony of destruction,” which is a phrase that I should only here in connection to The Maestro or if it happens to be the name of Kane’s next entrance music. Also, these phone promos by necessity make Braun look shorter due to the perspective, which makes him look less impressive that he wound in a regular camera-shot promo.

2 OUT OF 3 FALLS MATCH FOR THE WWE RAW TAG TEAM TITLES: Sheamus & Cesaro(c) vs. Titus Worldwide (w/Dana Brooke)- 6/10
Titus Worldwide are getting another title shot because Sheamus & Cesaro ran their mouths on Twitter after last night’s win, and Titus responded by pointing out that they still have a 3-2 record against the tag champs, so Kurt booked a 2 out of 3 falls match to settle things once and for all. I came shockingly close to actually liking this reasoning, but I still have to ask why the hell a gimmick match for the tag titles was not hyped up at any point in the first two hours of the show?
The first fall came about five seconds in when Cesaro distracted Titus to allow Sheamus to nail him with a Brogue Kick for the pin. They then had a pretty good second fall, which the heels won clean, so they are now 4-3 over Titus Worldiwde, totally killing them off as challengers… which I’m fine with. There was a very odd moment when Titus seemed to be going for a powerbomb on Sheamus but finished it like a Dominator, and I don’t think anyone will ever know if that was the plan or not, because it looked like Sheamus fell a little, but it also did look like that was what they planned to do even though it wasn’t what anyone expected.

CHARLY CARUSO INTERVIEWS SHEAMUS & CESARO- they buried all of the teams they’ve beaten. Sheamus worried that they would be left off of WrestleMania “because who do you face when there is no one left to beat?” This was a very good heel promo.

WARRIOR AWARD- same issues as every year. This isn’t what Warrior wanted.

“THE DRIFTER” SINGS- Good
He got to cut an actual promo first, in which he took a shot at Corey Graves after years of Corey sh*tting on him. That was great.

BRAUN STROWMAN vs. “THE DRIFTER” ELIAS SAMPSON- 2/10
Braun beat up and chased the drifter. Drifter got himself DQed for spraying Braun with a fire extinguisher. Braun then beat The Drifter up some more. Braun was going to put The Drifter through the announcers’ table but he raked Braun’s eyes and escaped. Braun chased him backstage in a scene that felt like it only existed so we could get the cliché wrestling tease of the limo pulling up, but this time it’s extremely stupid because it’s not like there is any mystery of who this could be.

HUNTER, STEPH, RONDA, & KURT SEGMENT- decent
Steph & Hunter come out here and claim that Kurt was hallucinating last night. Okay… if that’s their story, then why did they let him run the show tonight? Steph cut a great hypocritical heel promo and insisted that this would all be resolved speedily tonight after she simply explained the hierarchy here in WWE to everyone involved.
She first insisted that Kurt come out to apologize , but Ronda came out instead (with her hair up, which we all know means that she is all ready to square up). Hunter and Steph began to flee, but Kurt came out to talk to Ronda and try to calm her down. Ronda says that she will not allow herself to be disrespected or treated like property. Excellent. Then Kurt implored her to “work thin the system” because “I really need this job.”
OH COME THE F*CK ON! First of all… are you telling me that Olympic Gold Medalist Kurt Angle won’t be able to find a job? Why can’t he just go wrestle in this mythical “Japan” that they occasionally mention where AJ, Gallows, Anderson, Balor, Nakamura, and Itami won so many championships?
Secondly… is Kurt an idiot? Is that what I’m supposed to think? His delivery last night made it sound like he had no idea that revealing Hunter and Steph’s comments would be detrimental to the Ronda/Authority relationship (even though a small child would have known this), and if he really did know and said those things anyway, he’s an idiot for not thinking it would jeopardize his job which he needs so much makes him an idiot anyway!
Thirdly, Ronda is absolutely correct that she has a right to stand up for herself when she is being disrespected and to not have her employers treat her like property (you can argue that they haven’t treated her as such yet, but their comments show that they certainly do view her that way). Whatever Kurt’s financial situation is, Ronda’s right to being treated with respect trumps Kurt’s financial issues… and quite frankly, Kurt has come off like such an idiot here that I think it would be best for all of the WWE and its fans if Kurt did lose his job in favor of someone more competent.
Kurt is now going along with Hunter and Steph’s story, claiming that he lied last night. What a great babyface he is, betraying the truth for money, and trying to manipulate Ronda into a situation where the heels might well be able to manipulate her.
Ronda did, in fact, seem to buy it, but insisted that Kurt’s story didn’t resolve one thing: the slap. She insisted that if they want her to put everything behind them, Steph needs to apologize to her for slapping her last night. “And if you don’t apologize, I will not hesitate to rip your arm out of its socket.” The crowd chants for Ronda to “RIP IT OUT!” but Steph instead profusely apologizes to Ronda and Ronda seemed to… maybe “buy it” isn’t quite the right word, but she definitely accepted the public gesture.
So… everything is all happy and solved and the crisis is averted and Hunter and Steph turn to leave… and then Hunter lays Kurt out with a cheap-shot. WHY? He did everything you wanted and you got out of this with an obedient Kurt willing to destroy his own reputation to keep you happy and a mostly-obedient Ronda, who just asked for one simple verbal concession which Steph already gave… so what did this get you? However frustrating their characters might be in their interactions with the other wrestlers, Hunter and Steph are always portrayed as intelligent and calculating. This move was just plain dumb.

I laughed my ass off at the one cameraman getting in the other camera’s shot, then getting word he was in the way and ducking out. That was hilarious.

The worried talk of the town since last night as been Ronda’s promo skills, and while she started out a little stiffly here, I thought she was passable by the end, and I have no fear about her ability to cut promos in the long or even medium run.
This segment did what it was supposed to but I had trouble getting into it simply because I really don’t want to see Austin vs. McMahon again, and that’s clearly where this is heading.

Overall this was a meh show from WWE. There were no particularly short matches other than Braun vs. Strowman, but nothing too long, either, and while there was stuff I didn’t like, there wasn’t really anything that sent me into a rage. It was like watching Impact. Not bad, but not exciting, either.


Hold #712: ARM BAR!

Upcoming Reviews:
WWE in 2005
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
Beyond Flesh
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
ECW Guilty As Charged 1999

User avatar
Serujuunin
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Joined: Dec 17th, '10, 19:56
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Re: BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

Post by Serujuunin » Feb 27th, '18, 22:24

May I recommend a font edit? All that italic is hard to read >.<

User avatar
Big Red Machine
Posts: 20845
Joined: Dec 16th, '10, 15:12
Favorite Wrestler: Kane

Re: BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

Post by Big Red Machine » Feb 27th, '18, 23:21

Serujuunin wrote:
Feb 27th, '18, 22:24
May I recommend a font edit? All that italic is hard to read >.<
Ask and ye shall receive.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

Upcoming Reviews:
WWE in 2005
FIP in 2005
ROH Validation
Beyond Flesh
PWG All-Star Weekend V: Night 2
ECW Guilty As Charged 1999

User avatar
Serujuunin
Posts: 1821
Joined: Dec 17th, '10, 19:56
Favorite Wrestler: Jeff Hardy
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Contact:

Re: BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

Post by Serujuunin » Feb 28th, '18, 08:59

Big Red Machine wrote:
Feb 27th, '18, 23:21
Serujuunin wrote:
Feb 27th, '18, 22:24
May I recommend a font edit? All that italic is hard to read >.<
Ask and ye shall receive.
Thank you :)

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KILLdozer
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Joined: Dec 16th, '10, 22:54
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Re: BRM Reviews the 2/26/2018 Raw

Post by KILLdozer » Feb 28th, '18, 17:21

Nawh, don't "put your hair up, and square up."

More like....

"RUN UP... AND GET DONE UP!!!!"
When they come, they'll come at what you love.

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