The Wacky Sh*t Left Over in BRM's Brain After His Last Two Articles

[Big Red Machine]

So after my last two 2015 review articles, I had an idea for some comedy lists that didn't really pan out so well, but I've decided to post some anyway, so here goes...


TOP 5 TEAMS/STABLES THAT TOTALLY NEED NAMES IN 2016 (suggestions encouraged):
Colin, Enzo, & Carmella
Togi Makabe & Tomoaki Honma- (Can they really still be “Great Bash Heel” if that name was from, like, five years ago and they are now babyfaces?)
Dana Brooke & Emma- there’s got to be some kind of “Blondes” name you can use here
Toru Yano & The Briscoes
Silas Young & The Beer City Bruiser (my suggestion would be Best Friends By Default)






TOP 5 TOTALLY WACKY IDEAS FOR 2016:
(Full disclaimer: I was a little intoxicated when I came up with some of these)
5. Booker exchange- not for the actual booking, but as a fantasy booking exercise, I’d love for ROH, EVOLVE, and CHIKARA to switch bookers with Quack booking ROH, Delirious booking EVOLVE, and Gabe booking CHIKARA, starting from where they all left off in 2015 and going until the end of 2016. That’d be some crazy stuff right there.
4. EVOLVE brings in Simon Dean to manage Chris Hero. Using his “Simon System,” Hero loses weight and runs roughshod over everyone- not just in EVOLVE, but in PWG and NOAH as well. (And on a slightly more serious and much more feasible note, how about EVOLVE bringing Tank Toland in for a show to tell everyone how disappointed he is in Chris Hero getting fat, leading to a match where Hero kicks Toland’s ass?)

3. Eva Marie vs. Taleer Hendrix: Loser must dye her hair a different color!

2. Baron Corbin vs. minis dressed as Godwinns & the Proletariat Boar of Moldova (think about it for a minute. It’ll come to you).

1. DDM-FT4!
What is the DDM-FT4, you ask? Well if PWG runs a DDT4- the Dynamite Duumvirate Tag Team Title Tournament, why can’t they run a Dynamite Duumvirate Male-Female Tag Team Title Tournament, in which the entrants must all be couples? Imagine the brackets!

Joey & Candice (shut up. I know they’re not a shoot couple, but they’re Joey and Candice, so they still count!)
Davey Richards & Angelina Love
Daizee Haze & Delirious
Michael Elgin & MsChif
Magnus & Mickie James
Luke & Amber Gallows
Roderick Strong & Marina Shafir
Akira Hokuto & Kensuke Sasaki (they’d totally come out of retirement for this, right?)
(Obviously Roddy & Shafir would go over because they’re the most badass. Or maybe Sasaki and Hokuto are, but let’s have the old people put over the young people and build for the future!)

BTW, can you image how awesome the WWE version of this would be if WWE every got the required testicles and ovaries to do this:
Hunter & Steph
Jimmy Uso & Naomi
John Cena & Nikki Bella
Daniel Bryan Bryan & Brie Bella
Nattie Neidhart & Tyson Kidd
Rock & Ronda (she’ll get out of that UFC contract somehow)
Cesaro & Death Rey!
Punk & AJ (okay… even in a fantasy world, that’s a little too far- I think we’re far more likely to see Vince and Linda team up in a WWE ring than we are AJ and Punk), so let’s replace them with… um… Alexa Bliss & Murphy? Miz & Maryse? Dean & Renee? Yeah. Let’s go with Dean & Renee. No, wait apparently Zack Ryder & Emma is now a thing, so we’ll give them a spot. Perhaps this could lead to new push for Ryd- hahahahahahahaha! Sorry. I couldn’t even get through typing that without bursting into laughter.)

[cero2k]

this was one of the weirdest things i've read

So after my last two 2015 review articles, I had an idea for some comedy lists that didn't really pan out so well, but I've decided to post some anyway, so here goes...


TOP 5 TOTALLY WACKY IDEAS FOR 2016:
(Full disclaimer: I was a little intoxicated when I came up with some of these)
5. Booker exchange- not for the actual booking, but as a fantasy booking exercise, I’d love for ROH, EVOLVE, and CHIKARA to switch bookers with Quack booking ROH, Delirious booking EVOLVE, and Gabe booking CHIKARA, starting from where they all left off in 2015 and going until the end of 2016. That’d be some crazy stuff right there.
4. EVOLVE brings in Simon Dean to manage Chris Hero. Using his “Simon System,” Hero loses weight and runs roughshod over everyone- not just in EVOLVE, but in PWG and NOAH as well. (And on a slightly more serious and much more feasible note, how about EVOLVE bringing Tank Toland in for a show to tell everyone how disappointed he is in Chris Hero getting fat, leading to a match where Hero kicks Toland’s ass?)
I'm still hoping that Hero debuts in LU as the father of 'Son of Havoc" aka Havoc

3. Eva Marie vs. Taleer Hendrix: Loser must dye her hair a different color!

2. Baron Corbin vs. minis dressed as Godwinns & the Proletariat Boar of Moldova (think about it for a minute. It’ll come to you).

1. DDM-FT4!
What is the DDM-FT4, you ask? Well if PWG runs a DDT4- the Dynamite Duumvirate Tag Team Title Tournament, why can’t they run a Dynamite Duumvirate Male-Female Tag Team Title Tournament, in which the entrants must all be couples? Imagine the brackets!

Joey & Candice (shut up. I know they’re not a shoot couple, but they’re Joey and Candice, so they still count!)
Davey Richards & Angelina Love
Daizee Haze & Delirious
Michael Elgin & MsChif
Magnus & Mickie James
Luke & Amber Gallows
Roderick Strong & Marina Shafir
Akira Hokuto & Kensuke Sasaki (they’d totally come out of retirement for this, right?)
(Obviously Roddy & Shafir would go over because they’re the most badass. Or maybe Sasaki and Hokuto are, but let’s have the old people put over the young people and build for the future!)
Cherry Bomb and Pepper Parks
Mia Yim and Eddie Kingston
Johnny Gargano and Candice LeRae
Joey Ryan and Laura James
The Jarretts
Jessicka Havok and Sami Callihan
Trent and Chuck Taylor dressed as a woman
Ricky and Saraya Knight
Austin Aries and Thea Trinidad
Bennett and Maria (w/Third Wheel Taven)
Matt Hardy and Reby Sky
Ricochet and Tessa Blanchard
Dreamer and Beulah
Brooke and Robbie E (is that still a thing?)
CVE and MASADA (again, not sure if that is still a thing)


BTW, can you image how awesome the WWE version of this would be if WWE every got the required testicles and ovaries to do this:
Hunter & Steph
Jimmy Uso & Naomi
John Cena & Nikki Bella
Daniel Bryan Bryan & Brie Bella
Nattie Neidhart & Tyson Kidd
Rock & Ronda (she’ll get out of that UFC contract somehow)
Cesaro & Death Rey!
Punk & AJ (okay… even in a fantasy world, that’s a little too far- I think we’re far more likely to see Vince and Linda team up in a WWE ring than we are AJ and Punk), so let’s replace them with… um… Alexa Bliss & Murphy? Miz & Maryse? Dean & Renee? Yeah. Let’s go with Dean & Renee. No, wait apparently Zack Ryder & Emma is now a thing, so we’ll give them a spot. Perhaps this could lead to new push for Ryd- hahahahahahahaha! Sorry. I couldn’t even get through typing that without bursting into laughter.)
Carmella and Big Cass, Stardust and what's-her-face, Charlotte and Bram (in kayfabe, they're back together), Rosa Mendes and Michael Hayes, Bully Ray and Velvet Sky, Lesnar and Sable, Rollins and that chick they fired

i'm surprised i know so many couples.....

[Big Red Machine]

this was one of the weirdest things i've read
Can't say I didn't warn you.

So after my last two 2015 review articles, I had an idea for some comedy lists that didn't really pan out so well, but I've decided to post some anyway, so here goes...


TOP 5 TOTALLY WACKY IDEAS FOR 2016:
(Full disclaimer: I was a little intoxicated when I came up with some of these)
5. Booker exchange- not for the actual booking, but as a fantasy booking exercise, I’d love for ROH, EVOLVE, and CHIKARA to switch bookers with Quack booking ROH, Delirious booking EVOLVE, and Gabe booking CHIKARA, starting from where they all left off in 2015 and going until the end of 2016. That’d be some crazy stuff right there.
4. EVOLVE brings in Simon Dean to manage Chris Hero. Using his “Simon System,” Hero loses weight and runs roughshod over everyone- not just in EVOLVE, but in PWG and NOAH as well. (And on a slightly more serious and much more feasible note, how about EVOLVE bringing Tank Toland in for a show to tell everyone how disappointed he is in Chris Hero getting fat, leading to a match where Hero kicks Toland’s ass?)
I'm still hoping that Hero debuts in LU as the father of 'Son of Havoc" aka Havoc

3. Eva Marie vs. Taleer Hendrix: Loser must dye her hair a different color!

2. Baron Corbin vs. minis dressed as Godwinns & the Proletariat Boar of Moldova (think about it for a minute. It’ll come to you).

1. DDM-FT4!
What is the DDM-FT4, you ask? Well if PWG runs a DDT4- the Dynamite Duumvirate Tag Team Title Tournament, why can’t they run a Dynamite Duumvirate Male-Female Tag Team Title Tournament, in which the entrants must all be couples? Imagine the brackets!

Joey & Candice (shut up. I know they’re not a shoot couple, but they’re Joey and Candice, so they still count!)
Davey Richards & Angelina Love
Daizee Haze & Delirious
Michael Elgin & MsChif
Magnus & Mickie James
Luke & Amber Gallows
Roderick Strong & Marina Shafir
Akira Hokuto & Kensuke Sasaki (they’d totally come out of retirement for this, right?)
(Obviously Roddy & Shafir would go over because they’re the most badass. Or maybe Sasaki and Hokuto are, but let’s have the old people put over the young people and build for the future!)
Cherry Bomb and Pepper Parks
Mia Yim and Eddie Kingston
Johnny Gargano and Candice LeRae
Joey Ryan and Laura James
The Jarretts
Jessicka Havok and Sami Callihan
Trent and Chuck Taylor dressed as a woman
Ricky and Saraya Knight
Austin Aries and Thea Trinidad
Bennett and Maria (w/Third Wheel Taven)
Matt Hardy and Reby Sky
Ricochet and Tessa Blanchard
Dreamer and Beulah
Brooke and Robbie E (is that still a thing?)
CVE and MASADA (again, not sure if that is still a thing)

Beulah hasn't wrestled or even been around wrestling in forever.
Brooke and Robbie E. definitely aren't a thing anymore. They even used this in an angle in TNA either last year or in 2014.
Aries & Rosita I had forgotten about, Bennett/Maria, Hardy/Sky, and the Jarretts would lack in the working department.
Pepper Parks is a dork.
Didn't know about most of the rest.

BTW, can you image how awesome the WWE version of this would be if WWE every got the required testicles and ovaries to do this:
Hunter & Steph
Jimmy Uso & Naomi
John Cena & Nikki Bella
Daniel Bryan Bryan & Brie Bella
Nattie Neidhart & Tyson Kidd
Rock & Ronda (she’ll get out of that UFC contract somehow)
Cesaro & Death Rey!
Punk & AJ (okay… even in a fantasy world, that’s a little too far- I think we’re far more likely to see Vince and Linda team up in a WWE ring than we are AJ and Punk), so let’s replace them with… um… Alexa Bliss & Murphy? Miz & Maryse? Dean & Renee? Yeah. Let’s go with Dean & Renee. No, wait apparently Zack Ryder & Emma is now a thing, so we’ll give them a spot. Perhaps this could lead to new push for Ryd- hahahahahahahaha! Sorry. I couldn’t even get through typing that without bursting into laughter.)
Carmella and Big Cass, Stardust and what's-her-face, Charlotte and Bram (in kayfabe, they're back together), Rosa Mendes and Michael Hayes, Bully Ray and Velvet Sky, Lesnar and Sable, Rollins and that chick they fired

i'm surprised i know so many couples.....

[XIV]

There really was some shit left in there. But I love a mixed tag team tournament filled with couples, it would be good fun.

[Big Red Machine]

There really was some shit left in there. But I love a mixed tag team tournament filled with couples, it would be good fun.

I actually had a serious one going that was stuff that would be cool in 2016, but the only thing I had on the list so far was K.E.S. coming to WWE to be a badass monster heel tag team, but with Gallows and Anderson actually (hopefully) about to do that, I figured I should give up, post this instead, and just get working on fantasy booking until Smackdown stars (I think I'm going to save New Year Dash 2016 until the weekend at this rate).

[XIV]

There really was some shit left in there. But I love a mixed tag team tournament filled with couples, it would be good fun.

I actually had a serious one going that was stuff that would be cool in 2016, but the only thing I had on the list so far was K.E.S. coming to WWE to be a badass monster heel tag team, but with Gallows and Anderson actually (hopefully) about to do that, I figured I should give up, post this instead, and just get working on fantasy booking until Smackdown stars (I think I'm going to save New Year Dash 2016 until the weekend at this rate).

My, your wrestling brain has been busy!

[Big Red Machine]

There really was some shit left in there. But I love a mixed tag team tournament filled with couples, it would be good fun.

I actually had a serious one going that was stuff that would be cool in 2016, but the only thing I had on the list so far was K.E.S. coming to WWE to be a badass monster heel tag team, but with Gallows and Anderson actually (hopefully) about to do that, I figured I should give up, post this instead, and just get working on fantasy booking until Smackdown stars (I think I'm going to save New Year Dash 2016 until the weekend at this rate).

My, your wrestling brain has been busy!

Way too busy. I'm also trying to finish a NOAH show from September (the one with Suzuki vs. Sugiura and K.E.S. vs. War Machine), and trying to find time to start watching ROH Validation and some old Evolve shows.

[XIV]

I actually had a serious one going that was stuff that would be cool in 2016, but the only thing I had on the list so far was K.E.S. coming to WWE to be a badass monster heel tag team, but with Gallows and Anderson actually (hopefully) about to do that, I figured I should give up, post this instead, and just get working on fantasy booking until Smackdown stars (I think I'm going to save New Year Dash 2016 until the weekend at this rate).

My, your wrestling brain has been busy!

Way too busy. I'm also trying to finish a NOAH show from September (the one with Suzuki vs. Sugiura and K.E.S. vs. War Machine), and trying to find time to start watching ROH Validation and some old Evolve shows.

Sucks growing up with commitments doesn't it?

Between my job, my wife, my Warhammer, my football (both British & American) & my wrestling... I struggle for time, and I've dropped off TNA & most indy wrestling in the last couple of years. I need to stoke some time up to re-familiarise myself because WWE being my main source of Wrestling input just isn't cutting it.

[Big Red Machine]

My, your wrestling brain has been busy!

Way too busy. I'm also trying to finish a NOAH show from September (the one with Suzuki vs. Sugiura and K.E.S. vs. War Machine), and trying to find time to start watching ROH Validation and some old Evolve shows.

Sucks growing up with commitments doesn't it?

Between my job, my wife, my Warhammer, my football (both British & American) & my wrestling... I struggle for time, and I've dropped off TNA & most indy wrestling in the last couple of years. I need to stoke some time up to re-familiarise myself because WWE being my main source of Wrestling input just isn't cutting it.

Ah. See.. that was your mistake. You have too many other interests, and you have an actual life. I'm the only person regularly in my office, and I went straight into the workforce while most of my friends went off to graduate school in far away locations, so I basically have no life that doesn't revolve around wrestling or hockey or comics books (and I'm about a two years behind on most of the comic books).

[XIV]

Way too busy. I'm also trying to finish a NOAH show from September (the one with Suzuki vs. Sugiura and K.E.S. vs. War Machine), and trying to find time to start watching ROH Validation and some old Evolve shows.

Sucks growing up with commitments doesn't it?

Between my job, my wife, my Warhammer, my football (both British & American) & my wrestling... I struggle for time, and I've dropped off TNA & most indy wrestling in the last couple of years. I need to stoke some time up to re-familiarise myself because WWE being my main source of Wrestling input just isn't cutting it.

Ah. See.. that was your mistake. You have too many other interests, and you have an actual life. I'm the only person regularly in my office, and I went straight into the workforce while most of my friends went off to graduate school in far away locations, so I basically have no life that doesn't revolve around wrestling or hockey or comics books (and I'm about a two years behind on most of the comic books).

To be fair, because of the job, Playing any football (soccer) hasn't happened in 4 months now. I do regularly play and build Warhammer and I do not miss a WWE show all that often. I've just had to adapt slightly, which meant cutting some things off over the last couple of years, once I have kids... well... who knows what will happen, but Wrestling & Warhammer will always be part of my life, so I'll squeeze them in somehow.