NWK Reviews Chris Jericho's Rock n' Wrestling Rager at Sea (awful)

[NWK2000]

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final match
Christopher Daniels vs "Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington

We are told Dalton Castle is concussed because he was hit in the head with a title belt in the first round, and replacing him is Ashley Remington, who is VERY clearly Dalton Castle. Colt plays like they are different people, and Jay Lethal plays along until he doesn't and says that they're straight up the same person. Dumb comedy and like three good sequences before Ashley wins with a rollup and awards Christopher Daniels a fruit basket, which Daniels happily accepts. As someone who's reviewing Ring of Honor in 2002, this match offends my mortal soul

1.5/10

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final match
"The Villain" Marty Scrull vs Flip Gordon

Flip and Marty stall a bit during the Code of Honor schenanigans, and then immediately go to a false finish with a Rock Bottom by Marty.. Some fun sequences to start. I have never seen Flip Gordon in a singles match before, and I like what I see. Marty crotches Flip during a springboard and teases a Gran Naniwa rope crab walk, which nets the match an extra .5 just on its own. Instead, he just punches Flip in the face. Marty gets some submissions in, then Flip fights back to a false finish, we then get some strong style exchanges, as well as a tease at some rollup wins. Flip gets the chance to fire back up, and then after an exchange of moves, Flip flips the pin after a Sugarback Powerbomb. This is now the second rollup win we've seen, and after a signature move no less.

6/10

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final Match
Cheeseburger vs Jay Briscoe

Cheeseburger is wearing a Jushin Liger bodysuit, fuzzy winter jacket, and a wide brimmed beach hat. Cheeseburger needs adult supervision when he gets dressed and I hate him. Jay begs Cheeseburger to take a countout because Jay doesn't want to kill him. Cheese flips off Jay, which make him an idiot. Jay Lethal is entirely too excited about seeing a murder happen, because he marks out when Briscoe hits a big boot. The ref gives Cheeseburger a standing count at some point for no reason. Briscoe kills Cheeseburger forever until he comes back. Burger gets a 2 1/2 count on Jay fucking Briscoe. Completely unacceptable. Briscoe hits a Jay Driller for the win thank God.

DUD

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final match
Mark Briscoe vs "Hangman" Adam Page

Lots of no selling exchanges of basic moves to start. Because Adam Page hit a weak sounding chop to start, every bit of Adam Page offense gets a "That was weak" chant because wrestling fans are stupid and will drive a joke into the ground immediately. As if to prove my point, when Adam does a bridging deadlift Fall Away Slam, the crowd chants "That was strong" . A bird flies down and lands on a guy in the crowd. This causes both announcers to lose their shit, and completely lose track of the match. Jay in particular is crying with laughter. Briscoe wins with YET ANOTHER roll up. This was an average match hampered by a shitty crowd, a bird, and a threepeat of a finish we've seen earlier tonight.

4.5/`10

Sea of Honor Tournament Semi-Final match
Flip Gordon vs Dalton Castle

Dalton tells the ring announcer to tell everyone that he has a very severe sunburn and to not touch him ANYWHERE. And this guy is a babyface? He doesn't look sunburnt on his arms or legs, but at least he's wearing a shirt. Why am I analyzing this? A shoulder block causes Dalton to walk around like he's hurt. The fans chant asshole, and a woman very audibly goes, "SUCK IT UP YA BABY" Dalton takes a chop, and pours a fan's water down his shirt while he powders out. That would make it hurt more you fucking idiot. A backrake causes Dalton to sell like he's been stabbed with a sword. The referee checks Dalton. Go Flip! PUNCH HIM IN THE CHEST UNTIL HE DIES! Matt Taven is on commentary this night, and he's continually saying the tournament means nothing because he, not Jay Lethal, is the real world champion. Great job buddy.. We get some moves, and ANOTHER rollup giving Flip the win . This is FOUR ROLLUP FINISHES! AND IT LOOKED LIKE SHIT! FUCK THIS TOURNAMENT! I HATE MY LIFE!

DUD

Sea of Honor Tournament SemiFinal match
Jay Briscoe vs. Mark Briscoe

Apparently Jay toasted to friendly competition, but Mark threw the toast in his face. This is a show in 2018. There was no excuse for not showing footage of this. Mark throws a chair in Jay's face two minutes in and no DQ. But then again I guess you just kind of let stuff with the Briscoes go if you're an ROH referee. As you might expect, these two go hell for leather, big strikes, big moves, and a few weapons thrown in. And unsurprisingly, when two serious wrestlers have a serious match, it's the best match of the cruise.

7/10

Sea of Honor Tournament Final
Jay Briscoe vs Flip Gordon

Jay jumps Flip at the bell, which makes sense because you don't want him to get any momentum. Flip eventually fights back and tries to hit a 450 splash early, but Jay gets the knees up and rolls him up for a 2. Jay works as the default heel, and Flip makes comebacks. Jay hits the Jay Driller but Flip kicks out at 2. This was a huge moment, the commentators (Cabana and Lethal for the final night) and the crowd are all marking out. And then Flip immediately hits the Flip 5 for the win. The finish came entirely too soon after a huge moment

6/10

Bullet Club ("The Villain Marty Scrull, "The American Nightmare" Cody, and Kenny Omega) vs Alpha Club (The Young Bucks and Chris Jericho)

People are singing along to Judas. Jericho and the Bucks are wearing matching gear, which warms my tag team wrestling heart. Lots of fun dives to start. Jericho and Omega get tagged in early., but Cody blind tags Kenny because he's a dick. Jericho takes it to Cody. Nick tags in but gets isolated by the Bullet Club. Cody teases Shattered dreams but flips off the crowd instead. This allows Nick to hit a Crossbody. Nick makes the hot tag to Jericho after some more spots Jericho can still do his stuff like it's 1999. Cease and Desist/Walls of Jericho three way submission. Marty tags in Cody after a double down. More spots, and we finally get Jericho vs Kenny Omega, and a brawl between the two, which ends in a Triple Superkick party for a 2 Count. Meltzer Drivers, Walls of Jericho, Codebreakers, Cross Rhodes, Poisonranas,. Matt comes in illegally and Marty hits Jericho with his umbrella causing Kenny to only pick up a two. Kenny sells his back to tease but not do a OWA. Kenny hits an OWA on one of the Jacksons for the pin moments later

7.5/10

The show ends with the commentators asking when Jericho vs Omega II will happen as they stare each other down to close.


The main event was fantastic, Briscoe vs Briscoe was amazing, Briscoe vs Flip was good . But the rest of the tournament can go die. No one should purchase a Ring of Honor show, or buy into Honorclub next year. . The World Cup Tournament was a better tournament than this one, because while the finish was dumb, it was treated like a legitimate sporting contest . I would rather The Prince of Saudi Arabia buy WWE and watch Shane McMahon and Brock Lesnar squash all of my favorite wrestlers than watch Cheeseburger or Dalton Castle ever again. In fact, those two should be banned from televised professional wrestling all together, and their actions was enough to call a show with CHRIS JERICHO on it bad. Do not watch this show, or ANY further Ring of Honor products.

[Big Red Machine]

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final match
Christopher Daniels vs "Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington

We are told Dalton Castle is concussed because he was hit in the head with a title belt in the first round, and replacing him is Ashley Remington, who is VERY clearly Dalton Castle. Colt plays like they are different people, and Jay Lethal plays along until he doesn't and says that they're straight up the same person. Dumb comedy and like three good sequences before Ashley wins with a rollup and awards Christopher Daniels a fruit basket, which Daniels happily accepts. As someone who's reviewing Ring of Honor in 2002, this match offends my mortal soul

"Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington was a gimmick Dalton Castle used in CHIKARA a few years before his ROH run started. Fans would chant "LET'S GO SAILING." It was funny, like, twice. The character went nowhere because Quackenbush had already well lost his mind by then.

[Big Red Machine]

Also, you have made me quite glad you watched this show because now I know to avoid it.

[NWK2000]

Sea of Honor Tournament Quarter Final match
Christopher Daniels vs "Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington

We are told Dalton Castle is concussed because he was hit in the head with a title belt in the first round, and replacing him is Ashley Remington, who is VERY clearly Dalton Castle. Colt plays like they are different people, and Jay Lethal plays along until he doesn't and says that they're straight up the same person. Dumb comedy and like three good sequences before Ashley wins with a rollup and awards Christopher Daniels a fruit basket, which Daniels happily accepts. As someone who's reviewing Ring of Honor in 2002, this match offends my mortal soul

"Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington was a gimmick Dalton Castle used in CHIKARA a few years before his ROH run started. Fans would chant "LET'S GO SAILING." It was funny, like, twice. The character went nowhere because Quackenbush had already well lost his mind by then.

Chikara stopped being a thing in my head once all the competent indy guys stopped doing bookings for them and the roster became 100 percent dorks.

[cero2k]

I saw the show, I didn't think it was awful, but nothing really worth going out of your way to watch. It was what it was supposed to be, a fun show for a unique setting. It's a cruise, no one should be expecting a Final Battle to happen at a cruise. This was supposed to be more like a Night of Hoopla.

Apparently Jay toasted to friendly competition, but Mark threw the toast in his face. This is a show in 2018. There was no excuse for not showing footage of this

Considering this is the briscoes, 'toasted' could had been pot, so may be worth not showing it?

[NWK2000]

I saw the show, I didn't think it was awful, but nothing really worth going out of your way to watch. It was what it was supposed to be, a fun show for a unique setting. It's a cruise, no one should be expecting a Final Battle to happen at a cruise. This was supposed to be more like a Night of Hoopla

You probably aren't wrong. And you can put on a fun match working 75 percent less hard than you normally do. I felt like Dalton's stuff was almost TOO silly though, and the fact that a jobber like Cheeseburger got offense on basically the ROH guy actively made me mad

Apparently Jay toasted to friendly competition, but Mark threw the toast in his face. This is a show in 2018. There was no excuse for not showing footage of this

Considering this is the briscoes, 'toasted' could had been pot, so may be worth not showing it?

It's just a narrative issue that annoys me to no end regardless of context. If I was reading say, Lord of the Rings, and there was a sentence that said, "Oh yeah, Frodo and Sam had a disagreement on how to deal with The Ring". that would piss me off. I want to know what the characters said, what the disagreement was, and what happened as a result. In wrestling in 2018 this actually makes me more mad because you know that everything that happened in a ring on that cruise was recorded by somebody. Get somebody's fancam, do something that makes it sound like it actually happened and you didn't just conjure a feud out of mid-air like this was WWF circa 1992

[cero2k]

I saw the show, I didn't think it was awful, but nothing really worth going out of your way to watch. It was what it was supposed to be, a fun show for a unique setting. It's a cruise, no one should be expecting a Final Battle to happen at a cruise. This was supposed to be more like a Night of Hoopla

You probably aren't wrong. And you can put on a fun match working 75 percent less hard than you normally do. I felt like Dalton's stuff was almost TOO silly though, and the fact that a jobber like Cheeseburger got offense on basically the ROH guy actively made me mad

yeah, i don't disagree with you. The Dalton Castle was for the most part an inner circle joke, only a few recognized him when he came out, it was mostly all silence during his entrance, but I mean, it's the only time Dalton is ever gonna wrestle in a boat, i can totally understand wanting to capitalize on it.
As for Cheeseburger, it's the same thing we've been complaining since the beginning. Red and I have to come agree that he's only pushed because he's one of the only active success stories from the ROH Dojo, but we can't for the love of god understand why people like him. like he keeps getting booked in NJPW. At least try to teach him some grappling and have him work like Sabre or something.

[NWK2000]

yeah, i don't disagree with you. The Dalton Castle was for the most part an inner circle joke, only a few recognized him when he came out, it was mostly all silence during his entrance, but I mean, it's the only time Dalton is ever gonna wrestle in a boat, i can totally understand wanting to capitalize on it.

But it's a number 1 contendership tournament. You want to have a fun tournament with goofy comedy, fine. But don't link it to the next challenger for your top title. Have it just be a silly tournament, have Ashley win it so that he can be King of the Sea or something equally silly.

[Big Red Machine]

yeah, i don't disagree with you. The Dalton Castle was for the most part an inner circle joke, only a few recognized him when he came out, it was mostly all silence during his entrance, but I mean, it's the only time Dalton is ever gonna wrestle in a boat, i can totally understand wanting to capitalize on it.

But it's a number 1 contendership tournament. You want to have a fun tournament with goofy comedy, fine. But don't link it to the next challenger for your top title. Have it just be a silly tournament, have Ashley win it so that he can be King of the Sea or something equally silly.

This. I would have even almost been okay with it if he had spent the whole time on the cruise as Ashley Remington, and wasn't in the tournament but just became a surprise entrant in a six-man tag. You can even advertise Dalton Castle but then claim he couldn't come because of injury, take a guy out of an undercard tag match and put him in the tournament, then have Ashley Remington come out as the surprise replacement, and everyone can speculate that he might be Dalton's long-lost identical twin. But don't take Dalton Castle out of your tournament to replace him with a in-joke.

[Big Red Machine]

I saw the show, I didn't think it was awful, but nothing really worth going out of your way to watch. It was what it was supposed to be, a fun show for a unique setting. It's a cruise, no one should be expecting a Final Battle to happen at a cruise. This was supposed to be more like a Night of Hoopla

You probably aren't wrong. And you can put on a fun match working 75 percent less hard than you normally do. I felt like Dalton's stuff was almost TOO silly though, and the fact that a jobber like Cheeseburger got offense on basically the ROH guy actively made me mad

yeah, i don't disagree with you. The Dalton Castle was for the most part an inner circle joke, only a few recognized him when he came out, it was mostly all silence during his entrance, but I mean, it's the only time Dalton is ever gonna wrestle in a boat, i can totally understand wanting to capitalize on it.
As for Cheeseburger, it's the same thing we've been complaining since the beginning. Red and I have to come agree that he's only pushed because he's one of the only active success stories from the ROH Dojo, but we can't for the love of god understand why people like him. like he keeps getting booked in NJPW. At least try to teach him some grappling and have him work like Sabre or something.

I understand why people like Cheeseburger, and I think he's good at what he does. The problem is that the role he is given (and the way he is talked up by the announcers) do not match up with what he should be doing. Cheeseburger's role should be an a combination of the role that Delirious himself plays (hole-filler in occasional- or even more than occasional) undercard mutli-man matches, and role that Captain New Japan used to play (lovable jobber who rarely wins, and even when he does, it's not against anyone even at Will Ferrara's level). He's a great person to have a babyface destroy in a singles match if you're trying to give said babyface an edge as a prelude to turning heel, and his athletic abilities allow him to play a role in multi-man spotfests very well. I don't even mind the idea that Liger has taken a shine to this undersized kid with a big heart.
What Cheeseburger should absolutely NOT be doing is eating up time on shows (and especially not on TV) feuding with other undercard "why are they even on the shows?" (sorry to group you in with them, Rhett) losers, and doubly so when these feuds drag on forever and go nowhere. And the announcers should not be talking him up like he has some sort of major breakout potential. But that is exactly what Delirious does with Cheeseburger.

[KILLdozer]

I've recently read Castle to WWE could be a thing again soon.

[cero2k]

I've recently read Castle to WWE could be a thing again soon.

Castle ain't passing a physical right now

[Bob-O]

I've recently read Castle to WWE could be a thing again soon.

Castle ain't passing a physical right now

He could if he did some steroids.

[KILLdozer]

I've recently read Castle to WWE could be a thing again soon.

Castle ain't passing a physical right now

He could if he did some steroids.

AND WHY WOULDN'T HE?!?!?

[KILLdozer]

I'll say this though...

I don't think ANYONE needs to see those..."boys"...on steroids...Awh...

[cero2k]

I've recently read Castle to WWE could be a thing again soon.

Castle ain't passing a physical right now

He could if he did some steroids.

Roids don't heel your bones

[KILLdozer]

Castle ain't passing a physical right now

He could if he did some steroids.

Roids don't heel your bones

Sounds like you say that from...experience!

[KILLdozer]

I also think he meant "take a bunch of steroids, hit the giant rip and jack in front of WWE officials...instantly signed."

[Big Red Machine]

I tried to watch the big six-man tag and couldn't get through more than five minutes of it because the very booking of the match itself was grating in a way that made it all feel fake. They spent months on all of this Omega vs. Cody with the Bucks and Marty caught in the middle stuff only for the end result to be that everyone is a happy family again for All In, and now Cody is right back to being a dick to everyone. And the Bucks spent months agonizing over who to side with and getting upset at the merest of slights were Marty was angry at Kenny for putting him in a position where they would have to be on the other side of a wrestling match... and now the moment Kenny's mortal enemy who crashed their show and assaulted Kenny just a few weeks ago wants to team with them, and they go running to team with him? It's just so painfully apparent that everything about the match wasn't happening because it made sense but rather because "wouldn't it be so cool if...?"
When these guys do matches they're basically spotfests of emotion. They know how to do the big "spots" for a match or a storyline and know how to do the nice little touches and callbacks, but they don't understand how to do them in a coherent and logical manner, so it winds up hurting every single they do because the more they try to do, the less sense it all makes.

[cero2k]

It's just so painfully apparent that everything about the match wasn't happening because it made sense but rather because "wouldn't it be so cool if...?"

it's a match in a in a freaking cruise with costumes. don't try to connect everything to canon and make things serious. People paid a million bucks to have fun. If any of this was cannon, people would be complaining that it happened on a private show